Obaa Yaa
Itching to find out if he loves me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have a boyfriend and things have been moving on smoothly with us without sex until recently when I came across a young graduate who has completed his national service and living in the same vicinity with me.
This gentleman looks unfriendly when viewed from afar but he is down- to- earth and loves all people.
Additionally, he is serviceable and ever willing to give a helping hand no matter the type of work.
In view of this, I always call him whenever I am in dire need of assistance and I have taken him as my sibling.
Though he is good to me, he has never proposed to me but keeps on calling me “My love”.
He is such a caring and nice gentleman and my instinct tells me to find out from him whether he is interested in me, but my friends told me not to draw his attention to that because they believe he is doing this from his heart.
I am not convinced because when I checked his messages this evening, he has expressed his appreciation to me for all that I have been doing over the period. I sometimes go to his house and prepare food for him and he appreciates all that I do and tells me he loves me.
I would like to find out from him if he is interested in me because he is the shy-looking type who will always like to keep himself from trouble. When it comes to worse I will simply back out of getting close to him, though he is of immense assistance to me.
My boyfriend too has a lot on his hands so I don’t want to worry him sometimes. What should I do?
Ama, Tema.
Dear Ama,
Some people hardly talk openly express their feelings in public no matter the promptings or temptations that they are confronted with.
Your situation can be likened to an open race type for which you have to study the two gentlemen thoroughly and possibly wait for the opportune time to take decision.
Once you have not received any response from the new gentleman to know his intention or what he feels about you, there is every reason to maintain your composure. Equally essential is the need to be careful with your friends since not everyone will be sincere in the pieces of advice they will give.
Inasmuch as it is important to tread cautiously and let time be a determining factor in this case, you ought to play your cards in a diplomatic manner in order to get the best person out of the two.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
