Relationship
The role of employment status, wealth, geographical location in divorce
Several research findings have identified factors likely to account for divorce. These factors include (but are not limited to):
1. Employment Status and Income Levels of Individuals
Several research on the employment status of married individuals have identified how it influences marital stability. If the husband is employed, the likelihood of the marriage ending in divorce is low.
The is because, as the head, he would be in a better position to provide for the family’s needs, strengthening the family and increasing their standard of living (Lee, unpublished).
On the contrary, women who are employed are at risk of having a higher divorce rate, particularly when they find themselves in unhappy marriages.
This is because they can afford to be independent and cater for their children (Becker, Landes & Michael, 1977; Oppenheimer, 1997; Sayer & Bianchi, 2000). Moore’s (1994) argument also supports the fact that women’s divorce risks increase as they find themselves in highly time-demanding occupations outside the home. This is because they might be unable to devote ample time to their spouses and children.
Despite these findings, I know of a good number of women who are doing their best to maintain some balance between their married life and their work. I highly commend such women for their extra efforts on behalf of their families.
2. Wealth
Research shows that the individuals’ wealth status could either increase or decrease the probability of divorce. Some scholars (Kurderk, 1993 and Rootalu, 2010) indicated that when individuals are more affluent and wealthy, marriage stability is compromised because couples could easily afford the costs involved in the divorce process.
Others also suggest that individuals who are not wealthy (especially women) are at lower risk of divorce than more prosperous women (Ambert, 2002).
3. Geographical Location or Type of Residential Place
Geographic location and its characteristics could impact your marriage’s stability. Several studies on the location of residence have shown that married couples who live in urban communities are more likely to experience divorce than their rural counterparts (Adegoke, 2010; Adedokun, 1998).
According to Takyi (2001) and Moore (1994), urbanisation undermines African marriages.
Characteristics dominant in urban communities, such as the preference for conjugal union over the extended family and the increasing number of women in restrictive and time-consuming employment setups, have been argued to weaken the foundation of families and marriages.
This is because the conjugal family type does not allow for the involvement of other extended family members except for the immediate family (nuclear family). The immediate family is mainly made up of the married couple and their children; hence, there is less opportunity for the involvement of other members of the other family.
Indeed, it matters a lot how much your in-laws are involved in your marriage (in a healthy way, without much interference).
Modernisation in Africa is destroying the benefits that could have been derived from couples’ healthy relationships with the extended family.
Oppong (1992) supported this argument that African modernisation has led to the type of urbanisation, encouraging wide separation from extended families. Unfortunately, urbanisation supports an individualistic living arrangement (devoid of considerations for other families).
It is not surprising that a good number of researchers confirm that urban divorce rates exceed rural areas’ rates.
To be continued …
Source: Excerpts from “PREPARING FOR A HAPPY AND FULFILLING MARRIAGE: Everything You Need to Know Before You Say ‘I Do’” Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist, Lecturer, and Marriage Therapist). ORDER BOOK NOW: https://selar.co/preparing-for-a-happy-and-fulfilling-marriage
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COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAINING INSTITUTE)
Relationship
How to Navigate Social Media Boundaries as a Couple
Navigating social media boundaries as a couple can be tricky. With constant access to each other’s lives online, it’s essential to establish clear boundaries to maintain a healthy relationship. Here are practical tips to help couples manage social media use effectively.
1. Have an Open and Honest Conversation
The first step is to talk openly with your partner about social media usage and how it affects your relationship. Honest conversations may feel challenging, but they are essential for understanding each other’s perspectives and setting mutually acceptable boundaries.
2. Be Specific
When discussing boundaries, be clear about the behaviors that bother you and the limits you’d like to set. For example, instead of saying, “You spend too much time on social media,” try:
“I feel neglected when you are on your phone for extended periods during our conversations. Can we set a limit on phone usage during quality time together?”
3. Be Considerate
Consider and respect your partner’s viewpoint. Setting boundaries is not about controlling each other; it’s about creating balance and fostering trust in the relationship. The goal is to maintain connection without letting social media interfere with your bond.
4. Agree on Social Media Etiquette
Social media etiquette guidelines can help couples define what is and isn’t acceptable online behavior. Discuss whether you will follow each other, what kinds of photos you’ll post, and how you will interact with others online. Clear guidelines help prevent misunderstandings and maintain respect.
5. Respect Each Other’s Privacy
Respecting privacy is crucial. Avoid snooping on your partner’s accounts, sharing personal information without consent, or posting photos or updates that may make them uncomfortable. Trust and respect form the foundation of a healthy digital relationship.
6. Don’t Use Social Media as a Measure of Your Relationship
Remember that social media often shows a curated “highlight reel” of other people’s relationships. Avoid comparing your relationship to these selective portrayals. Every relationship is unique, with its own challenges and successes. Focus on what makes your bond special rather than online comparisons.
Conclusion
Setting boundaries on social media is key to nurturing a healthy, happy relationship. Open communication, mutual respect, agreed-upon etiquette, and avoiding comparison with others online are all vital steps in maintaining intimacy and trust in the digital age.
Source: Arkansas Relationship Counselling Centre
Relationship
Vulnerability, Openness Strengthen Relationship Bond

In the realm of romantic relationships, vulnerability and openness are often misconstrued as signs of weakness. However, research in psychology and relationship counselling suggests that embracing vulnerability can be a powerful catalyst for deepening emotional intimacy and strengthening bonds.
The Power of Vulnerability
Vulnerability involves sharing our innermost thoughts, feelings, and desires with our partner, making us susceptible to potential hurt or rejection. Yet, it is precisely this openness that allows us to build trust, foster empathy, and create a sense of safety in our relationships.
When couples prioritise vulnerability, they often experience a profound shift in their relationship dynamics. For instance, a couple I counselled, who were struggling to connect after a recent move, found that sharing their fears and anxieties with each other helped them rebuild their emotional intimacy. By being open about their struggles, they were able to support each other and strengthen their bond.
Benefits of Vulnerability and Openness
- Deeper understanding: By sharing our thoughts and feelings, we gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and our partner.
- Increased empathy: When we are open about our struggles, our partner is more likely to respond with compassion and support.
- Resilience: Vulnerability helps us develop coping mechanisms and learn to navigate challenges together.
- Authentic connection: By being our authentic selves, we create a sense of mutual understanding and connection.
Cultivating Vulnerability in Relationships
So, how can we cultivate vulnerability in our relationships? Here are some practical tips:
- Start small: Begin by sharing your thoughts and feelings in low-stakes situations, like discussing a book or movie. As you become more comfortable, you can gradually share more personal aspects of yourself.
- Practice active listening: When your partner shares their vulnerabilities, respond with empathy and understanding. This helps create a safe space for open communication.
- Be present: Focus on the present moment and try to let go of distractions. This allows you to stay engaged and responsive to your partner’s needs.
- Show appreciation: Express gratitude for your partner’s vulnerability and celebrate their courage in sharing their thoughts and feelings.
In many successful relationships, couples have reported that regular “check-ins” or meaningful conversations help them stay connected and build a stronger bond. By prioritising vulnerability and openness, these couples are able to address life’s challenges together, fostering a deeper sense of connection and intimacy.
Vulnerability and openness are essential components of a healthy, fulfilling relationship. By embracing these qualities, we can build stronger, more resilient bonds with our partners. As we navigate the complexities of relationships, let us remember that vulnerability is not a weakness, but a strength that can bring us closer to ourselves and our loved ones.
To be continued…
Source: Excerpts from “COURTSHIP MATTERS: Keys to a Fulfilling Lasting Marriage” by Rev. Counselor Prince Offei (Lecturer, Published Author, Mental Health Professional, and Marriage Counsellor).
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COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES
CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAINING
INSTITUTE)
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