Obaa Yaa
Should I take this initiative?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Life they say is full of uncertainties and one may not know where his or her help may come from that is the ultimate goal of why people befriend others. I hope Obaa Yaa helps me in terms of my decisions about relationship issues. I am currently a lost ball in the weeds and do not know what to do at the moment.
There is this girl I have befriended for months now and gradually I am head over heels for her but I do not know how to go about it nor do I want to upset my applecart. Should I go ahead and articulate my thoughts to her or we should be just friends because I am of the view that she may even end up befriending me should I let her know my thoughts, what should I do?
Yaw Baah, Koforidua, Eastern Region.
Dear Yaw
I am delighted that you reached out to Obaa Yaa with your problems. Honestly I understand how you feel, but my advice is that you are tactful in handling this issue. Every good love story has a unique start and while you do not want to stall your friendship with the lady by asking her out now, waiting too long to express your feelings to her too may be late. If you’ve built a good friendship and she seems ready for a quality relationship, express your love for her, for all you know she may be interested!
Good luck and if she accepts, kindly make her happy.
My dad has threatened not to attend my wedding; instead, he has been raining curses on me.
Each morning and night, he would call and rain curses on me, telling me I was bringing shame and bad luck to my marriage because I told him, my step father will be present.
I have personally been to his house to invite him, yet he keeps telling me he can’t make it. What should I do?
Kwesi,
Suhum
Dear Kwesi,
Your dad’s curses, guilt, and threats come from his pain and fear of losing his role, but that doesn’t make his behaviour idle.
You can love him as your father and still set a firm boundary for him.
If he crosses that line, end the call or stop replying his messages. Protect your wedding and your peace by limiting contact, especially late at night and early morning, and stand by your partner.
Remember, respecting your dad doesn’t mean erasing the role your stepdad played – both can matter without problems.
Don’t let his behaviour dictate the start of your marriage. You can’t control if he comes around, but you can control not letting his anger affect your emotions.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Before we got married five years ago, my husband told me that his former wife left him shortly after he lost his job following a financial scandal which rocked the company.
But thanks be to God that the court cleared him and ordered the company to pay him for the five years he stayed at home for wrongful dismissal.
As soon as this ex-wife heard that the company had complied with the court’s orders and paid him, she shamelessly declared that she was making a comeback and has vowed to kick me out of my matrimonial home at all cost.
She promised to hire ‘machomen’ to throw my things out of the house and was prepared to bear the consequence for that action.
Even though my husband has assured me that this would never happen, her ex is bent on disturbing my peace.
What should I do?
Adzo,
Tafo.
Dear Bertha,
The lady is threatening to use violence against you. That’s constitutes a breach of the law and she must be reported to the police for issuing those threats.
However, I will advise you to discuss it with your husband so that you are not seen as acting entirely on your own.
As a matter of fact, it is only the police that can handle this matter professionally and must be involved, unless of course your husband talks to his ex-wife to stop harassing you. So have a good discussion with your husband about the matter. All the best.
