Obaa Yaa
She has broken my heart
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I met this beautiful lady in 2021 at a crusade in Accra. Coincidentally, we stayed at the same place during the crusade as we listened to the word of God, prayed, and danced to gospel tunes from different artistes.
Having stayed at the same place throughout the night, it became obvious when l requested for her contact before we finally parted company at dawn to our respective homes.
I called her in the evening and that opened the floodgates of constant interactions between us. We sustained this lovely relationship until we agreed to get married.
This decision was welcomed by our parents and friends, all of whom wished us the best in our proposed marriage.
Unfortunately, as the time for our marriage drew closer, her attitude toward me changed and she made up her mind not to pick my calls any longer.
Shocked by this sudden change in her behaviour, l momentarily became disturbed and could not eat for days.
My mother who realised there was something wrong, consoled me with these words, “when one door is closed, another is opened.”
This revived my spirit and l tried to forget about this sad incident.
What should l do?
Thomas- Koforidua.
Dear Thomas,
Every misfortune comes with blessings provided one is patient to listen and follow events that happen in life.
God could be delivering you from a serious problem in the future so you should not be disturbed by the sudden change of events.
Take your time to study situations carefully and be of good cheer since there are better days ahead, provided you wait for God’s direction.
My dad has threatened not to attend my wedding; instead, he has been raining curses on me.
Each morning and night, he would call and rain curses on me, telling me I was bringing shame and bad luck to my marriage because I told him, my step father will be present.
I have personally been to his house to invite him, yet he keeps telling me he can’t make it. What should I do?
Kwesi,
Suhum
Dear Kwesi,
Your dad’s curses, guilt, and threats come from his pain and fear of losing his role, but that doesn’t make his behaviour idle.
You can love him as your father and still set a firm boundary for him.
If he crosses that line, end the call or stop replying his messages. Protect your wedding and your peace by limiting contact, especially late at night and early morning, and stand by your partner.
Remember, respecting your dad doesn’t mean erasing the role your stepdad played – both can matter without problems.
Don’t let his behaviour dictate the start of your marriage. You can’t control if he comes around, but you can control not letting his anger affect your emotions.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Before we got married five years ago, my husband told me that his former wife left him shortly after he lost his job following a financial scandal which rocked the company.
But thanks be to God that the court cleared him and ordered the company to pay him for the five years he stayed at home for wrongful dismissal.
As soon as this ex-wife heard that the company had complied with the court’s orders and paid him, she shamelessly declared that she was making a comeback and has vowed to kick me out of my matrimonial home at all cost.
She promised to hire ‘machomen’ to throw my things out of the house and was prepared to bear the consequence for that action.
Even though my husband has assured me that this would never happen, her ex is bent on disturbing my peace.
What should I do?
Adzo,
Tafo.
Dear Bertha,
The lady is threatening to use violence against you. That’s constitutes a breach of the law and she must be reported to the police for issuing those threats.
However, I will advise you to discuss it with your husband so that you are not seen as acting entirely on your own.
As a matter of fact, it is only the police that can handle this matter professionally and must be involved, unless of course your husband talks to his ex-wife to stop harassing you. So have a good discussion with your husband about the matter. All the best.
