Features
Of rat catcher, ambitions
It was the day for the interview. Boys as small as 11 and as old as 22 and numbering about 120 were scheduled to individually face a panel of three to justify their inclusion in the first year list of students of the secondary school that was their first choice.
The Common Entrance Exam (CEE) marks would be added to marks obtained at the interview, out of which a borderline would be drawn to make way for 80 new students. The rest could go to hell or become cocoyam farmers if they chose.
Incidentally, that was the year the school authorities decided not to enrol ‘grandfathers’. Hitherto, bearded men were admitted into form one primarily because the school needed physically powerful students to represent it during sporting activities.
Apparently, most of such muscled, macho candidates had stayed all their lives in the villages chasing rats and racing with grass cutters that didn’t want to end up in the soup pot. The skills of such candidates were thus harnessed to win hundred-metre races at inter-school athletics, meetings. Some could also run 800 metres like the antelope.
Some of these over-aged students loved school and had ambitions. They started school at the age of about 12. By the time they got to Form 4, they’d hit 22. They sat for the CEE, passed and got enrolled into secondary schools where they featured prominently in athletics because of their rat-catching skills and styles.
Normally they were not good footballers because they were notorious for scoring ‘own goals’. Neither were they good table-tennis players because they held the bats as if they were going to weed a cassava farm. But in the school-choir, they were fantastic as bass singers. In fact they sang double-bass and the school buildings shook with the resonance.
It was often the tradition that the biggest ‘man’ in the school was made the dining hall prefect in his final year. By that time, he should look like a Rwandan militiaman, and should eat like an idiot. However, they kept the discipline because of occasional slaps they dished out to recalcitrant juniors.
It also became registered that because the older boys developed uncontrolled appetite and passion for double-plates, they instigated the students to riot whenever there were lapses in proper nutritional management.
The big students, were, therefore, useful in certain ways but problematic in others because they were also bullies.
That year, the authorities decided that the tall middle-weight candidates wouldn’t be admitted, but they came for the interview all the same thinking that they would even be given preferences because they could compete with grasscutters in any free race.
The biggest and tallest entrant that year was a Togolese. While the lad was schooling at the primary level in Togo, his father was in Ghana. Having completed, he joined his Dad and attended middle school in Sikaman and studied Anglais. Luckily he passed the entrance exam although his English was quite damaging to the human ear.
Before the interview session, the headmaster came round to look at the candidates present. The Togolese copper arrived a bit late and when he landed, many mistook him for a pantryman. He grinned contentedly and was quite magnificent with his shirt tucked into a tight pair of shorts. His muscles bulged
When the headmaster saw him, he was awed. This was a classic example of men they didn’t want to admit into the school; a perfect specimen of the undesirables. The boy, sorry man, was almost 25, barefoot, completely shaven with close-cropped hair like a convict, hard face with a noble ambition to become either a lawyer or doctor.
His colleagues curiously studied him and agreed that he’d be a good sprinter for the school although they also admitted his appetite for food will be a problem to humanity.
The headmaster called him to have a chat.
“What’s your name?”
“Kormi,” he replied and grinned sheepishly.
“That’s the only name you have?”
“No. Kormi Drakey”, he said crudely.
“You’re a big boy”, the headmaster observed.
“Why have you applied to this school?”
“I can do sports well”, Drakey declared. “That’s why I apply”.
The implication was that he applied to help the school through its sporting problems and that his enrolment should be a matter of course, an issue of undisputed priority.
“You can run well?” the headmaster asked.
“Yes. Look at my thighs; couldn’t you see it? I be zonal champion. 100 metres, 200 and long jump. Nobody fit me.”
The headmaster was doubly impressed with the curriculum vitae. The boy was not a giant, he was indeed going to show his class.
“Okay”, said the headmaster. “Run round the park and let’s see your stamina.”
Drakey immediately took off like an Olympic champion as the headmaster called out the name of the first candidate on the list to begin the interviews.
Drakey circled the large park 13 times, and when he became very tired, he stopped and headed for the master’s office where the interview was taking place. He was sweating and bedraggled. The other candidates laughed because the Togolese machoman’s destiny was becoming quite tragic.
He opened the door and when the headmaster saw him, he was amused. He has forgotten all about the six foot candidate was becoming quite tragic. “Is that all you can run?” he asked.
This, certainly, was an irritating question.
“Didn’t you see me?” Drakey ejaculated. “I ran be a hare 13 good rounds. No be joke at all-o”.
Okay go and wait for your turn. It turned out that Drakey was indeed not given an admission letter after the ordeal, whereupon he became furious and insulted the headmaster.
“If you know you won’t took me why should you take me run like that? You don’t have sense? Is that how to treat a woman being? Your mother!”
Of course that wasn’t the right way to treat a human being much more a “woman being.” The case would have been referred to the then Ombudsman.
I was reminded of this incident when Samuel Adade was sacked from school because he was married, apart from the fact that he was grossly over-aged. The guy wanted to be somebody in life and saw education as the way out. Why should he be denied the opportunity?
His wife is dead and they still do not want him back in the school. This is clearly unjust. Sikaman Palava submits that a man’s education cannot be stifled because of age and marital status at this time when we are even encouraging the idea of functional literacy for our fathers and grandmothers. If 60 year olds are being encouraged to learn, why should a 22-year old be denied the opportunity just because he is married?
In some overseas countries, even 90 year olds are pursuing degree courses although they know they’d die the next minute.
If Master Adade cannot be enrolled because of his “old” age of 22, then functional literacy is no longer anything to encourage. Don’t you get my point?
This article was first written on Saturday, September 17, 1994
THE typical itinerant salesman in Sikaman is a herbalist. He is normally a slim macho with the capacity to perambulate the expanse of area covering the triangle of Accra-Tema-Ashiaman. In short, he can walk a total of 60 miles a day, marketing a product that cures every disease, including poverty. 
The door-to-door herbal pharmacist advertises his product by word of mouth. He has nothing to do with the Food and Drugs Board (FDB). After all, his concoctions do not feature on FM stations.
Those herbalists who cannot walk to propagate the herbal gospel, liaise with drivers of mass transportation and their mates. They are, therefore, given the chance to sell their products on Benz buses that ply the routes.
Normally, the herbalist starts his sales message with a prayer and Bible study. He asks the passengers to bow down their heads in supplication to God the father, the son, the Holy Spirit.
When a herbalist asks the passengers to close their eyes and bow their heads, Moslems on board naturally feel offended. They feel that the herbalist has no right to assume that every passenger is a Christian. They think such an assumption is an affront to Islam.
So a Moslem on board will raise the hand for a point of order. He’ll remind the herbalist that it would be in his own interest to mind his language.
“Be careful the way you address people in a public place. Not every person here is a Christian,” he’d state assertively.
Of course, the herbalist will promptly ignore him, but would all the same “watch” his tongue. Who knows whether or not the Moslem brother is inspired by Quoranic zeal to defend the tenets of Islam to the hilt?
When he starts saying, “Wallahi!” and “Inshallah!” it could be the beginning of proclaiming Islam as supreme, a point which must be driven home with talibanic precision.
So the herbalist must tread carefully lest he steps on fire.
The herbalist could even add a measure of mirth to it all, by announcing that Christians on board today have very interesting company on the journey, but that should not detract from the business of the day.
The Moslem brother will weigh the words carefully and offer a wry smile.
He must be careful the occasion does not degenerate into the use of semantics and proverbial oration to deride his conviction that public utterances must be mindful of religious sensibilities. He has made his point very clear and expects that it is taken in good faith in the interest of a peaceful journey.
The herbalist will now open the New Testament and preach salvation, stating clearly that salvation can come only through Jesus Christ and NOBODY else.
The Moslem brother will now start twitching his moustache. The visible and almost revolutionary reflexes of his upper lip can be an indication that sentiments have begun superseding reason, and the outcome could well be tragic now shift uneasily in his seat.
The time has come for him to also express his right to the religion of his fore-bears. He’ll put his hand into his pocket and rise to his feet. The time has indeed come!
This article was first published on Saturday, September 9, 2006
When the cause of a particular problem like sickness, disease, sudden illness, a social issue etc. are not known, it stands to reason that resolving it becomes a huge challenge.
Citizens would understand the government when public announcements are made to the effect that government is trying to find a solution to the issue, even though it is taking a while for it to be resolved because citizens are rational beings.
On the other hand, if the solution to a particular issue is known to everybody but the government for whatever reason, is dragging its feet in resolving it, citizens become frustrated and begin to lose trust in their leaders.
One such issue is the heavy traffic along a section of the Kasoa – Odokor road. A short stretch of bad road between the traffic light at the Weija Government Hospital and the entrance to the entrance of the overhead that leads to the N1, is the cause of the problem but nothing is being done about it, day after day, week after week, month after month. Thus is clearly unacceptable.
Another issue that requires urgent attention is the lack of pavements along a lot of streets in parts of the various Municipal Assemblies. Exercise is a prerequisite for long life and healthy living and for those of us who it has become a way of life, this issue of people putting up structures right to the edge of the drains beside the roads, are making life difficult for us.
We are compelled to walk along the roads, putting our lives at serious risk. Pedestrians should never be compelled to compete with vehicles on our streets and roads. Roads and streets are made for vehicles and pavements are made for pedestrians. That is the norm. Any attempt to normalise a situation where pedestrians are mingling with vehicles is insanity.
It is the road regulations that makes it so and therefore district or municipal assemblies are to take responsibility and ensure that spaces for pavements are not encroached upon. Citizens have rights that must be protected by their leaders and making pavements available to pedestrians, is one of them.
When we hear of teachers having sex with students, it appears it is something recent. It is not a new phenomenon. It has been there since Adam. Perhaps this issue is getting much attention due to the proliferation of social media. It was an open secret in times past when Teachers were in relationships with female students and some married them immediately after completion of school.
Some teachers were also known to be having unholy interactions with female pupils but due to the times that these acts occurred, human rights issues and the awareness around it, allowed such unscrupulous teachers to get away with their crimes.
Now we are in a different era and so a Headmaster is now in hot waters. He is alleged to have raped about 19 female students and as usual, some officials tried to cover it up and are also in hot waters and their actions or inactions in the matter are under investigation.
Why the man has been allowed to roam freely without being arrested is simply mind boggling. It appears that the law applies differently, depending on who you are. This issue came to public attention sometime in August this year, yet the police had not arrested or invited this man for question regarding the rape allegation.
It has come out that he is a Constituency Secretary of the ruling party and the question in the public domain is that, is it because he is a political figure that is why he is still walking around without questioning? I believe in the rule of law so let us hold our breadth and let the proper thing be done.
The police must however be seen to be active in this matter. God bless.
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