Obaa Yaa
My wife has been discussing me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I and my wife have been married for five years now, although we have known each other for over three years.
She is a banker and I am a journalist. We have two beautiful daughters.
The problem is that her childhood female friend who is not married yet has been worrying me to sleep with her. I told my wife about her actions and how she comes into our apartment whenever my wife is not around.
I personally confronted her and she told me my wife was the cause. She said my wife keeps telling her how good I am in bed.
Is it right for a partner to discuss a husband to a friend?
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Dear Jeff
You have a very interesting but serious issue at hand.
For your wife to discuss such issues with a friend suggest they are very close and trust each other.
But that notwithstanding, it is not enough to make her friend take such an action.
In our clandestine moments, friends chat about a lot of personal issues based on the trust that exist between them so I would not blame his wife much.
My issue is with the way her friend reacted. It means she has always been ‘crushing’ on you but never mustered the courage to tell your wife.
I think you did very well by avoiding her and making your wife aware of what was happening. She will now know the kind of ‘serpent’ she’s keeping as a friend.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
