Obaa Yaa
My sisters disapprove of my girlfriend
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Though we attended different universities, we were good friends and maintained the friendship until we completed school.
Having known each other for a long time, we got attached to each other and could not resist the idea to marry.
During the course of our dating, she used to visit me at home and this made it possible for my family to know her better.
On many occasions, she spent some time with my sisters in the house, even on occasions l was not at home, they discovered that she was not a good lady for me to marry.
They complained that she was lazy, would not wash dishes after her meals, failed to tidy up her surroundings among others.
My sisters added that she was not courteous and lacked manners. l was surprised to hear these complaints from them.
l believe the complaints were genuine because they were happy when l introduced her to the family the first time. What should l do?
John, Takoradi.
Dear John,
You are fortunate to discover such character traits in your fiancé at this stage before you take any definite decision in your relationship.
That is why the youth are always advised not to indulge in sexual intercourse during dating, since this has the tendency to possibly cloud your reasoning when faced with the challenge to make certain decisions in a relationship.
Since your sisters have failed in helping her to change her behaviour, l don’t know whether your intervention can help in this case. You are being cautioned about the dangers inherent in such a marriage and the possibility to reconsider your decision.
If you are able to change her character to suit your desire, then you can go ahead to marry her.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I wrote sometime back in 2024 to discuss an ordeal I went through. I contracted a sexually transmitted disease (STD) when I was doing my national service. Initially, I thought it was a normal sickness, so I visited a nearby hospital for treatment. I still feel itching and pains in my manhood.
I began to worry about the whole situation. I wrote to you and you directed me to see a specialist. The doctor did what he could, but the disease still persists. I have also gone through a lab test which shows that there is nothing wrong with me. A few doctors and pharmacists I contacted claim it could be psychological.
There is a sore at the tip of my male organ, and I am disturbed. Not only do I find it difficult to urinate, but it gives me continual sharp waste pain. Currently, I’m not only going through serious physical pains but psychological, because I cannot concentrate on my job for five minutes. I have also been praying and fasting. Can this be spiritual?
Mawuli, Keta
Dear Mawuli,
I hope you are doing well. I will advise you to take your medication regularly. There is still hope for your situation. See a urologist at the Korle-Bu Teaching Hospital for assistance.
I cannot say if your condition is spiritual or not. However, do not stop praying to God. Your miracle may just be on the way.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I’m a lady in my late 30s who wants to give love a second chance, despite all the pain and scars love has caused me.
Tony was just a new staff my company recruited to work in my department. We became friends, and our friendship became stronger when we realised we were both of the same tribe. We fell madly in love, and dating each other was the best option. I got pregnant and less than a month later, we did our traditional wedding and later signed in court.
I found out that my husband, Tony, had a wife and a child in the United Kingdom (UK) when I was eight months pregnant and five months married. What should I do?
Patricia, North Kaneshie
My dear Patricia,
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It takes a lot of courage to open up about your pain. It sounds like you’ve been through a really tough experience with Tony.
First, let’s acknowledge your strength and resilience. You’ve been through a lot, and you’re still standing. That says a lot about your character.
It sounds like Tony presented himself as a good man, and you believed him. You connected well and he seemed to have good family values, but it turns out he was hiding a big secret.
My advice to you is to take time to process your emotions. It’s okay to feel angry, hurt, and confused, but allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship and the future you thought you had.
You might want to consider seeking support from loved ones, a therapist, or a support group. Talking through your feelings can really help.
In terms of the next steps, you may consider getting legal advice to understand your rights and options. As a pregnant woman, you have certain rights, and it’s essential to prioritise your well-being and the baby’s well-being.
