Obaa Yaa

My sisters disapprove of my girlfriend

Published

5 years ago

January 23, 2021

Dear Obaa Yaa,

Though we attended different universities, we were good friends and maintained the friendship until we completed school.

Having known each other for a long time, we got attached to each other and could not resist the idea to marry.

During the course of our dating, she used to visit me at home and this made it possible for my family to know her better.

On many occasions, she spent some time with my sisters in the house, even on occasions l was not at home, they discovered that she was not a good lady for me to marry.

They complained that she was lazy, would not wash dishes after her meals, failed to tidy up her surroundings among others.

My sisters added that she was not courteous and lacked manners. l was surprised to hear these complaints from them.

l believe the complaints were genuine because they were happy when l introduced her to the family the first time. What should l do?

John, Takoradi.

Dear John,

You are fortunate to discover such character traits in your fiancé at this stage before you take any definite decision in your relationship.

That is why the youth are always advised not to indulge in sexual intercourse during dating, since this has the tendency to possibly cloud your reasoning when faced with the challenge to make certain decisions in a relationship.

Since your sisters have failed in helping her to change her behaviour, l don’t know whether your intervention can help in this case. You are being cautioned about the dangers inherent in such a marriage and the possibility to reconsider your decision.

If you are able to change her character to suit your desire, then you can go ahead to marry her.

Obaa Yaa

I am Torn Between Two Guys

Published

6 days ago

October 11, 2025

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am torn between two guys and finding it very difficult to make a choice.

I have known the first guy for three years. We respect each other a lot. We started as just friends, but we recently began dating. Even though we don’t have much in common, he makes me feel loved and special.

Interestingly, I met the second guy only two weeks ago through a mutual friend. From the beginning, it has been nothing but good vibes between us. I enjoy his company, and we share many things in common. He is basically my type of man, both physically and mentally.

Now I feel like I have to choose, but I am lost and unsure who to go for.

—Esinam, Legon

Dear Esinam,

When it comes to love, everyone must take time to think carefully. You’re not just choosing a partner—you are choosing a potential husband and the father of your children, regardless of your current feelings.

Consider your priorities. Which of the two aligns better with your values, goals, and aspirations?

You might also reflect on:

Emotional stability — Who offers long-term security and respect?
Compatibility — Who truly understands you and shares your vision?
Consistency — Who has shown genuine care over time?
Future plans — Who fits into the life you want to build?

Attraction and good vibes are important, but so are character, compatibility, and long-term intentions.

Take your time, listen to your inner peace, and choose the one who fits not just your heart today, but your future tomorrow.

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Obaa Yaa

My grades are dropping

Published

6 days ago

October 11, 2025

WeeklySpectator

Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 22-year-old lady at the University of Ghana, Legon. I realised my Grade Point Average (GPA) was very good and could even get a First Class if I put in more effort.

It is rather unfortunate that in Level 300, I have noticed a significant drop in my academic performance, which has left me both confused and worried about my future.

The increased workload and expectations at this level have been overwhelming, making it challenging to balance demanding courses with extracurricular activities and personal responsibilities.

This pressure has fuelled my anxiety, making it even harder to maintain my grades. The coursework is substantially more demanding, and I often find myself struggling to keep pace.

This sudden shift has been disheartening, and I can’t help but worry about the long-term impact it may have on my future.

Chelsea, Accra.

Dear Chelsea,

Although you have realised a significant drop in your grades, it does not mean that you should throw in the towel. See it as a signal to change your approach to studies.

Identify the subjects or topics you are struggling with and put in more effort. Create a study timetable to manage your time well, making sure you revise regularly instead of waiting until exams.

Don’t hesitate to ask teachers for clarification or join a study group with friends who understand the subject better.

Also, cut down distractions such as too much time on the phone or the use of social media when studying.

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