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Obaa Yaa

My past life is traumatising me

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Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am currently going through difficult moments in my life because of my past activities.

I am a 35-year-old lady who is single and hoping to get married, however, nothing is working for me.

The issue is that, in the past, I had a special preference for only married men and so far, I have been able to date about seven of them. Out of this number, I have destroyed five of those marriages due to my relationship with the husbands.

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I made sure I made time for them, cook and always offer them good treatment, especially in bed because they were all nice to me.

My dilemma is that, one of the men wants to marry me after divorcing his wife.

However, my friends are advising me not to make that move because it will look as if I am the reason for their break up.

Will I be wrong by marrying him because I am still single and searching?

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Worried Lady,

Achimota.

Dear worried lady,

Marrying someone who has divorced the spouse because of you can be quite complex.

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Even as you reflect on your journey and seek a new path, there are several concerns that may arise.

First, there’s the idea of karmic debt, which suggests that our actions bear consequences. In this context, marrying someone to whom you played a role in his divorce might evoke feelings of guilt or unease.

Additionally, it’s essential to consider the emotions of the wife who has been left behind. Entering into a marriage with her ex-husband could be viewed as a lack of respect for her and the relationship they once shared.

This situation also prompts important self-reflection regarding your personal growth. It’s worth contemplating whether marrying this person would signify genuine progress in your life or if it might merely lead to repeating past patterns.

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However, there is another side to consider. Everyone deserves a second chance, and if you’ve truly repented, committing to someone who loves and accepts you could represent a positive step forward. Ultimately, the most crucial aspect of your decision should be your own happiness and well-being, as you strive to create a fulfilling future.

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Obaa Yaa

I have no peace in my home

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Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am 35year –old-lady married to a banker. I am a housewife. I am fair in complexion. I got my left hand tattooed sometime last year. I have never had my peace with my husband because he strongly abhors.

In my attempt to get it erased, I have caused a big scar on my hand which has worsened the situation. Sometime ago, your esteemed paper carried a story about how permanent tattoo can be cleared and a location.

May I know whether it is possible to get the scar and tattoo erased, and how much it would cost.

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Worried housewife, Prampram.

Dear housewife,

Since I have no idea how wide and deep the scar and tattoo are, it would be difficult for me to have a meaningful discussion with the specialists at the unit.

I suggest that the next time you visit Accra, you pay a visit to any skincare unit and ask what help they can offer.

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But until then, do not apply any self-medication. You may also ask your doctor to advise you as if there is any way out for a surgery. All the best.

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Obaa Yaa

He doesn’t wear his wedding ring

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Dear Obaa Yaa,

Ever since we got married, two years ago, my husband seldom wears his wedding ring except on occasion such as church service, funerals, outdooring and other social gatherings.

For the rest of the week, he goes to work without it. The excuse he gives is that whether he wears the ring to work or not, he is by law married to me.

But I beg to differ. I suspect there is more to it than what he told me. I need your advice on this.

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Eno, Ashiaman.

Dear Eno,

Some men don’t like wearing rings; others enjoy it. It is just like how some women like wearing jewellery or large earing while others would rather do away with them.

The fact, however, is that a man can misbehave even when he wears it or not because there are ladies who wouldn’t mind with the ring on.

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When he gets back home, he would wear it again. What difference does it make if he doesn’t wear it all?

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