Obaa Yaa
My decision to marry worries my parents
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Though I love my girlfriend and would like to marry her, my parents are not in favour of our relationship.
We have been in a relationship for five years and have decided to marry despite the disagreement of my parents.
My parents used several tricks including influencing many relatives to discourage me from going ahead to marry my lover but all have failed since I will go by my plan to marry this lady.
One of the most recent deceit was to discourage me on the grounds that the lady cannot conceive due to her previous relationship.
It is quite interesting to note that my girlfriend has not had any previous relationship to justify their claims that she is incapable of conceiving.
Despite all problems, I am still willing to marry this pretty lady and build my family with her.
Should I go ahead with my decision?
Samuel, Accra.
Dear Samuel,
Your problem is a general one which a lot of youth are confronted with.
Though marriage is contracted between two lovers, the consent or the approval of parents is important for peace to prevail.
Despite the differences in opinion between you and your parents, there is the need to smoke the peace pipe so that you can enjoy their support, love and care. With this, your wife- to-be will feel happy in the marriage.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.
Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.
This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I has now become a family affair.
I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.
He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.
Baaba, Apam
Dear Baaba,
Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage.
Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.
Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.
You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.
On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200.
He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.
Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.
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