Obaa Yaa
I intend to quit marriage
He was a devout Christian who carried out his activities with zeal and to the admiration of the lecturers and students in the institute.
Without mincing words, l developed deep love for him and wished l could be his special friend to make me stand tall among the rest of the female students.
In school, other students discussed their liking for this senior of ours and there was not a single person who said anything bad about his character.
As fate would have it, this student lost his school Identification Card and the message went round but it could not be found anywhere.
I went home to pick up provisions my parents bought for me when my mother showed me an ID card that had been found in town and enquired from me if l could trace the owner in my school.
I screamed the loudest to inform my mother that the owner was one of our school mates. This discovery marked the beginning of our friendship which lasted three years without any misunderstanding between us.
I receive his call one afternoon that he would like to accompany me to the house after close of work. Shortly after he had arrived in my office, there came a downpour which lasted more than four hours and claimed many lives.
Terrified by the havoc the rain had caused and the fear of the unknown, he suggested that l should spend the night in his apartment for my safety.
Unfortunately, in the night, he could not hold unto his moral principles while l also gave in suddenly to his sexual demands. l got pregnant, became sick in the process and had to pass through series of challenges.
Terrified initially, he later came to perform the marriage rites and promised to follow up with wedding when conditions improved.
Surprisingly, his character has changed after l was delivered of my child. He has refused to support me in any way and failed to heed my calls to assist in educating the child.
I was shocked to the marrow to discover that my husband has a three-year-old male child and he pays frequent visits to the family.
In shame, he has confirmed the story after l had provided further details.
I am taken aback by this new development and contemplating ending the marriage.
Will l be right in carrying out this plan?
Akua.
Dear Akua,
You should be worried about how this ‘angel’ of yours who you cherished in the past has transformed, the circumstances under which you got pregnant and why he is treating you like this.
Kindly remain calm and maintain your life in the modest way possible. It is likely that he is passing through inexplicable challenges and should be given sometime to straighten up his life.
It is too early to throw in the towel. Time will definitely tell.
MY daughter completed Senior High School this year and she had a very good grade.
With her grade, her father wants her to pursue Computer Science Engineering, but she had an interest in Civil Engineering.
Finally, admission forms are out and my daughter got Civil Engineering.
Her father doesn’t pay for her school fees because she did not choose the course he wanted her to offer.
Due to this, they don’t see eye to eye and it is causing tension at home.
Please, how do I reconcile father and daughter? I am so stressed with what’s going on between the two. Thank you.
Enyonam, Keta.
Dear Enyonam,
BOTH of them have legitimate feelings: the father may be worried about her future and wants to guide her, while your daughter wants to pursue a field she is genuinely interested in.
Do not try to settle the matter when either person is angry. The purpose should not be to decide who is right, but to find a solution that protects their relationship and your daughter’s future.
Ask your daughter to explain why she chose Civil Engineering.
She should explain what attracts her to the course, the subjects involved, the career opportunities and, importantly, why she believes she can succeed in it. If she has researched the universities and career paths, she should present that information to her father.
Talk to the father that financial support should not become a weapon.
It is understandable that a parent wants to have a say in a child’s education, especially when paying the fees. However, withdrawing educational support simply because his daughter chose a different legitimate course can damage their relationship. He can express his disagreement while still supporting her and allowing her to take responsibility for her choice.
Dear Araba,
THERE is this handsome gentleman in my area I am crushing on badly. He gave me a lift to the office a month ago and I mistakenly farted in the car.
When the incident happened in the car, he just stared at me but looked unbothered, which made me a bit comfortable.
Araba, Takoradi.
Dear Araba,
HONESTLY, I don’t see anything wrong with that. You are human, and human beings fart. The fact that he didn’t say anything or make you feel uncomfortable probably means he understood that it was an accidental, normal bodily function.
Ever since that incident happened, he has stopped calling or texting me. He doesn’t even give me a lift any longer.
Please, tell me, is it a crime to fart in your crush’s car?
What is keeping you embarrassed after months is not the fart itself but the meaning you have attached to it. You have replayed the incident so many times that it has become bigger in your mind than it probably ever was in his.
Just confront him that it was a mistake and, for that matter, we should let go of everything and move on.
