Obaa Yaa
I am afraid of getting married
I am afraid of getting married the third child of my parents, a graduate and 27 years old. Though I am working and have the means to cater for a family of my own, I am afraid of getting married because my two elderly brothers are suffering from broken marriages.
Their weddings were good in the beginning but could not go beyond four years.
The traumatic experience one of them had nearly resulted in a serious health problem.
This predicament is putting fears in me not to marry. Unfortunately, most of my colleagues have married and developing their families but I am at a standstill.
For this reason l would like to remain single to free myself from this problem. Despite my decision, I am waiting for your advice to help guide my decision.
Kwame, Tema.
Dear Kwame,
Though it is good to study current developments in your family to guide your future, we have different opportunities, circumstances and challenges in life that people go through. Things happen for different reasons and each person is different.
It was a coincidence that your brothers had this problem, and this should not put fears into you.
The circumstances under which your brothers operated will definitely be different from yours so have a changed mindset, remain positive and venture into marriage its benefits.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.
Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.
This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I has now become a family affair.
I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.
He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.
Baaba, Apam
Dear Baaba,
Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage.
Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.
Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.
You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.
On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200.
He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.
Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.
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