Obaa Yaa
Her love is still in my heart
Dear ObaaYaa,
We started friendship four years ago on a good note and this was a delight to many people.During the four years of our friendship, we visited each other at home and our parents and relatives had no problem with our relationship.
When l had surgery about two years ago, my lady was always there to render her support and services in whichever way she could and people admired her for that.
I was fortunate to get a job at Tamele in the Northern Region and she visited me on four occasions. Later, she told me that her father had disapproved of our relationship without assigning any reasons.
All attempts to persuade her to stick to our resolve to marry is unsuccessful and l am seriously disturbed about the latest events.
The love we have for each other is great and l do not know what step to take.
Kofi, Accra.
Dear Kofi,
I can imagine how you feel about the change of events in your relationship. I find it quite interesting how your parents were in support of your decision to marry initially.
Since it is not possible to pinpoint what might have informed his decision to change his mind suddenly, keep calm and see how things will turn out to be finally.
Though you might have enjoyed each other’s company all these yearsand very certain of a lovelymarried life, things are going contrary to how you had planned.
All the same, convey your sentiments to your girlfriend and plead with her to convince some of her relatives to talk to her father to rescind his decision.
However, if this suggestion fails, then you have to end the relationship, though on a painful note.
Six months after marriage, I realised my wife had cheated twice. One happened months before marriage and the other happened just two months after marriage. We dated for four years before we got married.
She had saved the name on her phone as Chairman. The conversation between them didn’t happen every day but once they talked, everything was about sex. My wife encouraged every word and even made suggestions as to where to meet.
I want to meet ‘Chairman,’ is it a good or a bad idea?
Yoofi, Takoradi.
Dear Yoofi,
What you have discovered is deeply painful, especially after investing four years of dating and entering marriage with trust, love and commitment. Betrayal in marriage is not only about the physical act, but also the emotional damage, secrecy and broken trust that come with it.
At this point, it is important not to make decisions purely out of anger or revenge. You need clarity, honest and calm conversations. Your wife must first be willing to tell the whole truth and take responsibility for her actions without excuses.
However, before deciding whether to stay or leave, ask yourself some important questions. Is she willing to cut ties completely with this man? Is she ready to rebuild trust through openness and accountability? And most importantly, do you still see a future with her despite the hurt?
Healing from infidelity takes time, patience and sometimes professional counselling. Do not suffer in silence. Speak to a trusted counsellor, pastor or matured family person who can guide both of you wisely.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 28 years old guy who has been posted as a trained teacher in one of the rural areas in the Central Region.
I didn’t move in with my family because of the nature of my wife’s job.
About two months ago, I befriended one of the students who run errands for me. One thing led to the other and mistakenly had my way with her.
After two weeks, the girl came to tell me that she was pregnant and that I should give her money to terminate the pregnancy because if her parents get to know of it, they would cause my arrest.
This got me disturbed because I might lose [u1] my job.
Upon a second thought, I discussed this with a friend and she told me it might be a plan to extort money from me.
I personally texted her not to terminate the pregnancy but interestingly, I received a response that she has seen her monthly flow.
In fact, I became convinced about what my colleague told me. I want to end the relationship, what should I tell her and what should be my response when my wife hears of it.
Obaa Yaa, please I need an urgent advice.
David, Tema.
Dear David,
Your case is a very simple one. You are even lucky your friend who is much acquainted with the chicanery of the local girls fortunately hinted you and the girl has confirmed it all.
You better quit that relationship and avoid her because she thinks about following you home.
If you haven’t told her you are married, please tell her now.
