Obaa Yaa
Dear Obaa Yaa,
A family friend of ours returned from the United States of America and brought me a lot of goodies.
He invited me to his house and gave me a digital camera, an I-Phone, dresses and cosmetics.
Suddenly, this guy, a womaniser by nature ever since I have known him, started making midnight calls to me on the phone he gave me.
I refused his calls because he always called late. One morning, he informed me that I should return all the things he gave me.
Interestingly, I sold my phone because of the new one he gave me. So, if I give it to him, I would have no phone.
Nyamedo, B.A.
Dear Nyamedo,
I DON’T think you have to return the gift because he did not offer them to you in exchange for anything.
There was no agreement that he was giving you the items in exchange for love.
Gifts, once given unconditionally, remains gifts and cannot be returned.
If your friend had any intentions about you, what stops him from letting you know?
You can’t just give someone something and assume the person will be in love with you.
If he harasses you, report the matter to the police.
I will advise you to stop taking gifts from people if you don’t know their intention to avoid this kind of drama.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We bumped into each other on orientation day as freshers on campus. I liked his smile, his choice of words, and charisma. I didn’t hesitate at all when he asked for my contact. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with a guy like this, I said to myself.
We texted more often, had conversations on phone, and our friendship literally grew very strong. We attended lectures together, studied together, hanged out together; everyone thought we were lovers.
He did everything for me—surprise dates, thoughtful gifts, pays my academic fees, and gives me a listening ear everyone would wish for.
One evening at a friend’s birthday party, standing in the middle of the audience, he proposed and asked me to be his girlfriend. I declined his proposal; this was because I have no feelings for him, and I just want us to be friends.
He is a man with good morals, so gentle, God-fearing, ambitious, a man every lady would wish for, but my heart just wasn’t in it. I wondered if love was supposed to be this complicated: the more he did, the more I felt like a friend, not a lover. He still wants me, but I want us to be just friends. What should I do?
Naa Kwarley, Kaneshie.
Dear Naa Kwarley,
This is a tough situation, and you’re handling it with both kindness and firmness.
Since you’ve already told him you’re not interested in a romantic relationship, it’s crucial to be clear and direct while still being respectful. I’d advise you to reiterate your feelings to him, emphasising that you value him as a person and appreciate what he’s done, but you see him more as a close friend. Make it clear that you hope you can still maintain a strong friendship, but it can’t be anything more.
It’s essential to be prepared for him to need space or time to process, so be patient and understanding.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a regular reader of your highly esteemed paper and I would like to know whether some amount of money is paid to those who write short stories for publication on the children’s page of your Weekly Spectator.
I wrote a short story which was published last month, and my friends who saw it told me that a token will be paid to anyone whose story is published.
A.J., Kwabenya.
Dear A.J.,
We don’t pay for short stories published on our children’s page. That opportunity is to encourage school children to develop the habit of writing. We believe that by publishing their short stories, they’ll be encouraged to write more.
The paper is open to everyone who wants to share ideas or write about a concern.
