Features
Confusion in Tema
TEMA is a city of mysteries. When someone dies, chances are that the person will resurrect and shame the devil. Come to the harbour city and you’d meet a few Jesuses of Nazareth and of course Kwame Korkorti.
Because people in Tema are used to dying and resurrecting after three days, when someone dies, it is important that the person himself go round town to announce his obituary before people can believe he is really dead and wouldn’t wake up and cause commotion.
When the infamous, spine-chilling Madam High Heels died in Tema a few years back, she announced her death in a rather grand style. She toured all primary schools in Tema, wearing a white dress and high-heeled pair of footwear. For more than eight weeks she terrorised school children. “I saw her with my own eyes,” one kid swore. “She wore high-heel shoes and her walkings was very stylish.”
“She entered into our classroom and then vanished when we screamed,” another recounted.
It was rumoured that only children could see the ‘ghost on strike’ because they are ‘holy.’ So they could see the celebrated ghost which was on tour allegedly searching for its lost daughter among school children.
In one of the schools, one male teacher nearly defecated when his class children began screaming in terror. A stampede was in progress and the terrified teacher who did not see the ghost apparently because he wasn’t holy, did not know which direction to flee. And if he had the misfortune of meeting the Madam right in his way, it could be disastrous for his health and future.
“Where is it?” he cried out to the kids. “It is near you!” they shouted back. That was enough to loosen his bowels.
The next stop was Teshie where the Madam visited. It was a real challenge to both staff and pupils. It was a real race as both teachers and kids defied all odds and took off in different directions. But it was the head teacher who impressed everybody. No one gave him a dog’s chance but he outran both his contemporaries and the younger generation.
Actually, he proved to all that he was not headmaster for nothing. He also proved that under certain circumstances you have to abandon the school children and seek your own salvation. Each for himself. Man no fool!
Apparently one kid had heard something like someone walking with high-heeled shoes and raised the alarm. That was enough for the speed.
Soon after the Madam rounded-off her tour came the era of the Black Cat. Don’t get scared, Black Cat isn’t really a cat and does not intend to be. The Cat is in fact a human being. He was commissioned by the Tema Metropolitan Assembly (TMA) to arrest floating drivers.
The emergence of floating drivers became a phenomenon when the lorry station which was first located near the Community One market was relocated remotely beyond the Mankoadze roundabout.
It caused great inconvenience to travelers because getting to the new station demanded some miles of walking in some cases. It turned out that some LT and mini-bus drivers took advantage of the situation, turned coat and began floating like butterflies picking passengers by the roadsides.
The GPRTU executive lamented the new development. The floaters were getting all the jobs and weren’t paying station fees. They were also allegedly dodging tax because they had turned renegade and were under nobody’s control. They complained to TMA and the Black Cat was hired to solve the problem using strong-arm and red-eye.
Black Cat is a strong, burly, barrel-chested fellow who has quite a reputation in the city. He seemed just right for the job. He headed a task force that moved silently around Community One in a taxi or a minibus targeting floating drivers and catching them for disciplinary action.
Sometimes, it resulted in a real chase when the recalcitrant drivers took off in escape. It was always a spectacle; dangerous sensation of screeching, weaving, dodging and aponkye braking as they raced, one escaping, the other furiously pursuing.
It was just miraculous that accidents did not occur in the misadventures. Sidewalks were trespassed by the offending drivers who either swung precariously to the left or to the right to avoid the Cat, with pedestrians screaming in terror and taking cover.
Residents of Tema became concerned about the dangerous pursuits and complained. Nobody minded them. Then one day Black Cat caught one driver but the man decided to resist arrest. Apparently he was too “tough copper” and decided to defy the might of the human cat.
A fight ensued and soon a capacity crowd gathered to witness it. In the course of it, it became clear that the driver was a poor match for Black Cat, and sooner or later the Cat’s back would touch the ground in defeat.
Sensing danger, it was alleged that Black Cat drew a knife and whum! whum! whum! Adzeiii-i-I!
News of the death of the driver reverberated the length and breadth of the harbour city. The rumour came in different versions. “Black Cat stabbed the man twice in the neck, twice in the stomach and once in the nose,” someone told me that day. Others said different things about the incident. What was, however, certain was that the driver had died.
The news incensed fellow drivers who stormed the offices of the TMA and ravaged it, burning a bus (allegedly belonging to Black Cat), smashing windscreens and causing pandemonium and destruction. The quiet made residents from all the communities converge on Community One to see what the hell was going on.
The death of the driver had precipitated a disturbance and the security agents had a tough time calming frayed nerves. Then something happened. The dead man was seen roaming in town and feeling good himself. He had resurrected.
What! Tema really is a mystery city.
This article was first published on Saturday May11, 1996
THE typical itinerant salesman in Sikaman is a herbalist. He is normally a slim macho with the capacity to perambulate the expanse of area covering the triangle of Accra-Tema-Ashiaman. In short, he can walk a total of 60 miles a day, marketing a product that cures every disease, including poverty. 
The door-to-door herbal pharmacist advertises his product by word of mouth. He has nothing to do with the Food and Drugs Board (FDB). After all, his concoctions do not feature on FM stations.
Those herbalists who cannot walk to propagate the herbal gospel, liaise with drivers of mass transportation and their mates. They are, therefore, given the chance to sell their products on Benz buses that ply the routes.
Normally, the herbalist starts his sales message with a prayer and Bible study. He asks the passengers to bow down their heads in supplication to God the father, the son, the Holy Spirit.
When a herbalist asks the passengers to close their eyes and bow their heads, Moslems on board naturally feel offended. They feel that the herbalist has no right to assume that every passenger is a Christian. They think such an assumption is an affront to Islam.
So a Moslem on board will raise the hand for a point of order. He’ll remind the herbalist that it would be in his own interest to mind his language.
“Be careful the way you address people in a public place. Not every person here is a Christian,” he’d state assertively.
Of course, the herbalist will promptly ignore him, but would all the same “watch” his tongue. Who knows whether or not the Moslem brother is inspired by Quoranic zeal to defend the tenets of Islam to the hilt?
When he starts saying, “Wallahi!” and “Inshallah!” it could be the beginning of proclaiming Islam as supreme, a point which must be driven home with talibanic precision.
So the herbalist must tread carefully lest he steps on fire.
The herbalist could even add a measure of mirth to it all, by announcing that Christians on board today have very interesting company on the journey, but that should not detract from the business of the day.
The Moslem brother will weigh the words carefully and offer a wry smile.
He must be careful the occasion does not degenerate into the use of semantics and proverbial oration to deride his conviction that public utterances must be mindful of religious sensibilities. He has made his point very clear and expects that it is taken in good faith in the interest of a peaceful journey.
The herbalist will now open the New Testament and preach salvation, stating clearly that salvation can come only through Jesus Christ and NOBODY else.
The Moslem brother will now start twitching his moustache. The visible and almost revolutionary reflexes of his upper lip can be an indication that sentiments have begun superseding reason, and the outcome could well be tragic now shift uneasily in his seat.
The time has come for him to also express his right to the religion of his fore-bears. He’ll put his hand into his pocket and rise to his feet. The time has indeed come!
This article was first published on Saturday, September 9, 2006
When the cause of a particular problem like sickness, disease, sudden illness, a social issue etc. are not known, it stands to reason that resolving it becomes a huge challenge.
Citizens would understand the government when public announcements are made to the effect that government is trying to find a solution to the issue, even though it is taking a while for it to be resolved because citizens are rational beings.
On the other hand, if the solution to a particular issue is known to everybody but the government for whatever reason, is dragging its feet in resolving it, citizens become frustrated and begin to lose trust in their leaders.
One such issue is the heavy traffic along a section of the Kasoa – Odokor road. A short stretch of bad road between the traffic light at the Weija Government Hospital and the entrance to the entrance of the overhead that leads to the N1, is the cause of the problem but nothing is being done about it, day after day, week after week, month after month. Thus is clearly unacceptable.
Another issue that requires urgent attention is the lack of pavements along a lot of streets in parts of the various Municipal Assemblies. Exercise is a prerequisite for long life and healthy living and for those of us who it has become a way of life, this issue of people putting up structures right to the edge of the drains beside the roads, are making life difficult for us.
We are compelled to walk along the roads, putting our lives at serious risk. Pedestrians should never be compelled to compete with vehicles on our streets and roads. Roads and streets are made for vehicles and pavements are made for pedestrians. That is the norm. Any attempt to normalise a situation where pedestrians are mingling with vehicles is insanity.
It is the road regulations that makes it so and therefore district or municipal assemblies are to take responsibility and ensure that spaces for pavements are not encroached upon. Citizens have rights that must be protected by their leaders and making pavements available to pedestrians, is one of them.
When we hear of teachers having sex with students, it appears it is something recent. It is not a new phenomenon. It has been there since Adam. Perhaps this issue is getting much attention due to the proliferation of social media. It was an open secret in times past when Teachers were in relationships with female students and some married them immediately after completion of school.
Some teachers were also known to be having unholy interactions with female pupils but due to the times that these acts occurred, human rights issues and the awareness around it, allowed such unscrupulous teachers to get away with their crimes.
Now we are in a different era and so a Headmaster is now in hot waters. He is alleged to have raped about 19 female students and as usual, some officials tried to cover it up and are also in hot waters and their actions or inactions in the matter are under investigation.
Why the man has been allowed to roam freely without being arrested is simply mind boggling. It appears that the law applies differently, depending on who you are. This issue came to public attention sometime in August this year, yet the police had not arrested or invited this man for question regarding the rape allegation.
It has come out that he is a Constituency Secretary of the ruling party and the question in the public domain is that, is it because he is a political figure that is why he is still walking around without questioning? I believe in the rule of law so let us hold our breadth and let the proper thing be done.
The police must however be seen to be active in this matter. God bless.
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