Obaa Yaa
She must leave my house
Dear Obaa Yaa,
When l was successfully delivered of my son, my husband and l saw the need to look for a house help to assist in the performance of the domestic chores to relieve me of the workload at home.
l understood him because the decision was taken in my interest and to provide me with some time to rest when less busy.
When the house help finally settled down in the house, she started wearing mini-skirts, transparent dresses and sometimes partially exposing her breast through her dress.
I did not hesitate to draw her attention to the fact that l was against her dressing so she must change.
Though l have served her this notice, she has refused to comply and continue to dress the way l have cautioned her against.
This lady is the type who is capable of meddling in matters which do not concern her.
A friend of mine who met her in town a couple of times has suggested that l should expel her from the house in order to save my marriage. She said l should not blame anyone if she succeeds in snatching my husband from me.
My husband has disagreed to my suggestion that the lady should leave the house because it is difficult getting house helps these days.
What should l do?
Nancy, Ablekuma, Accra
Dear Nancy,
I would like to commend you for your vigilance and for taking pains to study the nitty-gritty of what happens in your house.
Be reminded of the saying that “actions speak louder than words.” The details you have identified and the observation of your friend all point to the danger lurking in your backyard and immediate steps must be taken to address it before it gets out of control.
You can only save your marriage by ensuring that this lady leaves your house for good. However, if you delay, you would have yourself to blame.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We bumped into each other on orientation day as freshers on campus. I liked his smile, his choice of words, and charisma. I didn’t hesitate at all when he asked for my contact. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with a guy like this, I said to myself.
We texted more often, had conversations on phone, and our friendship literally grew very strong. We attended lectures together, studied together, hanged out together; everyone thought we were lovers.
He did everything for me—surprise dates, thoughtful gifts, pays my academic fees, and gives me a listening ear everyone would wish for.
One evening at a friend’s birthday party, standing in the middle of the audience, he proposed and asked me to be his girlfriend. I declined his proposal; this was because I have no feelings for him, and I just want us to be friends.
He is a man with good morals, so gentle, God-fearing, ambitious, a man every lady would wish for, but my heart just wasn’t in it. I wondered if love was supposed to be this complicated: the more he did, the more I felt like a friend, not a lover. He still wants me, but I want us to be just friends. What should I do?
Naa Kwarley, Kaneshie.
Dear Naa Kwarley,
This is a tough situation, and you’re handling it with both kindness and firmness.
Since you’ve already told him you’re not interested in a romantic relationship, it’s crucial to be clear and direct while still being respectful. I’d advise you to reiterate your feelings to him, emphasising that you value him as a person and appreciate what he’s done, but you see him more as a close friend. Make it clear that you hope you can still maintain a strong friendship, but it can’t be anything more.
It’s essential to be prepared for him to need space or time to process, so be patient and understanding.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a regular reader of your highly esteemed paper and I would like to know whether some amount of money is paid to those who write short stories for publication on the children’s page of your Weekly Spectator.
I wrote a short story which was published last month, and my friends who saw it told me that a token will be paid to anyone whose story is published.
A.J., Kwabenya.
Dear A.J.,
We don’t pay for short stories published on our children’s page. That opportunity is to encourage school children to develop the habit of writing. We believe that by publishing their short stories, they’ll be encouraged to write more.
The paper is open to everyone who wants to share ideas or write about a concern.
