Obaa Yaa
I feed myself and pay my school fees
Dear Obaa Yaa
I AM a 16-year old girl and live with my mother and father at Osu. A lot of things goes through my mind because I wonder if they are my real parents because they don’t take care of me.
I pay my own fees and feed myself, and what annoys me most is that my father sometimes ask me for money.
They don’t even ask me where I get the money from. My parents are really irritating me with this attitude of theirs. Even though they are both unemployed, I don’t think it’s an excuse enough for them to neglect me.
Gloria,
Senya Beraku.
*****
Dear Gloria,
IF your parents are unemployed, they naturally cannot care for you exactly the way you want.
What you have to do is to pray that your parents gets something to do so that they can be in a position to care for you.
Meanwhile, try as much as possible not to ‘sell’ yourself to unscrupulous men just because your parents are not looking after you.
If you are not in school, that is if you are on vacation, try and do some trading so that you can earn some income for your upkeep until things improve.
As for your parents not asking you about the source of your money, I don’t believe you have to make any case out of it.
The most important thing to consider is that the source must be clean. Don’t get money out of immorality, and lose your life in the proces
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Due to a small misunderstanding, my wife has left her matrimonial home and had gone to stay with my in-laws. I have been invited by them to come for the matter to be settled.
However, I have been reliably informed that my wife and my three-year-old son are currently staying with a man.
This is so annoying, I want to call in the police to arrest and charge this man for abduction.
Philip,
Accra.
Dear Philip,
You don’t have a problem with this man. You have a problem with your wife.
Also, do not rely on hearsay to act. I suggest you go to your In-laws to ask of your wife and listen to what they have to say.
Go along with a mature member of your family and discuss the issue.
If it is just a ‘small misunderstanding’ as you say then let your attitude lead to reconciliation.
If it is true that your wife is living with a man and her parents endorse it then that is another matter.
Your family must meet her family squarely on the matter to decide whether your marriage to their daughter is over or not.
But don’t go for a divorce no matter how complicated things may turn out to be. You owe your child his happiness. The police is a last resort.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a girl of 25 years. My fiancé is 30 years. We met about three years ago when my fiancé was in training college. The plan was to get married after his schooling so we started making initial preparations towards that.
Now, my fiancé has started working in readiness to carry on with the engagement but his father says he should hold on because he started work not long ago.
His father doesn’t object to our relationship but he insists that my fiancé should further his education at the University before the engagement.
He warned, however, that if we insist on carrying out with the engagement, then he should be counted out. He would have nothing to do with his son again.
My fiancé also thinks marriage without the consent of the father can be disastrous because the Bible even talks about honouring one’s parents.
Obaa Yaa, my problem is that I cannot wait any longer. I feel like walking out of the relationship because my fiancé is being dictated to by the father. Please what should I do.
Ekua,
Obom.
Dear Ekua,
Probably your fiancé’s father is concerned about a better future for the two of you since marriage can be financially demanding.
What you are calling ‘engagement’ is customary marriage.
I believe you need to accept your boyfriend’s father’s advice and also use the opportunity to either further your education or be financially stable.
It is good to be married but it is better both partners are financially stable so that both of you will not be financially or emotionally drained in the marriage.
Real security is when you and your partner have no ulterior motive for marrying each other but for the sake of mutual love and respect which is based on the fear of God.
