Obaa Yaa
Exchange house with abortion
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have been in a relationship close to five years with a married man and have enjoyed every aspect of it. My lover ensured that we both went on trips within and out of the country.
Our relationship took us through interesting moments and during one of our outings, we were nearly caught in our hideout by his wife who attended a seminar at the same hotel we lodged.
Having suffered many insults and embarrassments from his wife, l became pregnant and he impressed on me to abort it in exchange of a house.
Unfortunately, six months after causing the abortion, my lover decided to back out of the relationship with an excuse that l cheated on him and that he would not allow himself to be deceived by me because he had learnt a bitter lesson from the past.
What should l do?
Sarah, Accra.
Dear Sarah,
The challenges you have gone through explain the fact that it is not safe and acceptable to fall in love with somebody’s husband.
The insults, humiliations and disgrace you might have gone through should be enough to convince you to take a definite decision to break up the relationship with this man. It is not advisable to take delight in the support you are receiving from him.
You will never know peace so long as you maintain this unhealthy relationship. This is the time to take control of your life and resist the temptation of falling in love with this gentleman again.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
