Obaa Yaa
She changed after admission to Legon
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a banker working with one of the prestigious banking sectors in Ghana. In 2020, I met a very pretty young lady who had just completed her secondary education and was preparing to proceed to the University of Ghana Legon.
Prior to her entry into Legon, I proposed love to her and she gave in later but on condition that we did not engage in any sexual activity until we are ready to marry.
I fully complied with it and for over two years, we never had sex. In 2023 she finally gained admission into Legon and after three months on campus she started showing signs of disinterest in me, though she has sworn to me that she will never disappoint me in life.
When I demanded to know where I have wronged her, she could not say anything tangible to me. I have done all things to get her attention back but it seems, she has already made up her mind.
After sometime, I also decided to stay away from her though, I did not intend to call it quits until when she got to the second year when we met again and told her of the pain I had gone through.
She sounded encouraging, so we started through to the final year. My problem is that anytime this lady got out of my life, I find it difficult to meet another partner comparable to her. I still love her, what should I do?
Darko, Mankessim.
Dear Darko,
When it comes to love people take it on a smooth journey, others are not lucky.
From the look of things, I can tell that your girlfriend is no more interested in the relationship. She might have another suitor at school.
You made it known to me that you still love her and you want to make her your wife.
In my opinion, if she continues to give you attitude and pretend you don’t exist, kindly walk away for your peace and sanity.
You made a statement that, it is difficult to get a suitor just as your girlfriend. My advice to you is that, don’t rush, relax and give yourself some time to heal. You will definitely find a suitor who will give you peace and love.
Six months after marriage, I realised my wife had cheated twice. One happened months before marriage and the other happened just two months after marriage. We dated for four years before we got married.
She had saved the name on her phone as Chairman. The conversation between them didn’t happen every day but once they talked, everything was about sex. My wife encouraged every word and even made suggestions as to where to meet.
I want to meet ‘Chairman,’ is it a good or a bad idea?
Yoofi, Takoradi.
Dear Yoofi,
What you have discovered is deeply painful, especially after investing four years of dating and entering marriage with trust, love and commitment. Betrayal in marriage is not only about the physical act, but also the emotional damage, secrecy and broken trust that come with it.
At this point, it is important not to make decisions purely out of anger or revenge. You need clarity, honest and calm conversations. Your wife must first be willing to tell the whole truth and take responsibility for her actions without excuses.
However, before deciding whether to stay or leave, ask yourself some important questions. Is she willing to cut ties completely with this man? Is she ready to rebuild trust through openness and accountability? And most importantly, do you still see a future with her despite the hurt?
Healing from infidelity takes time, patience and sometimes professional counselling. Do not suffer in silence. Speak to a trusted counsellor, pastor or matured family person who can guide both of you wisely.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 28 years old guy who has been posted as a trained teacher in one of the rural areas in the Central Region.
I didn’t move in with my family because of the nature of my wife’s job.
About two months ago, I befriended one of the students who run errands for me. One thing led to the other and mistakenly had my way with her.
After two weeks, the girl came to tell me that she was pregnant and that I should give her money to terminate the pregnancy because if her parents get to know of it, they would cause my arrest.
This got me disturbed because I might lose [u1] my job.
Upon a second thought, I discussed this with a friend and she told me it might be a plan to extort money from me.
I personally texted her not to terminate the pregnancy but interestingly, I received a response that she has seen her monthly flow.
In fact, I became convinced about what my colleague told me. I want to end the relationship, what should I tell her and what should be my response when my wife hears of it.
Obaa Yaa, please I need an urgent advice.
David, Tema.
Dear David,
Your case is a very simple one. You are even lucky your friend who is much acquainted with the chicanery of the local girls fortunately hinted you and the girl has confirmed it all.
You better quit that relationship and avoid her because she thinks about following you home.
If you haven’t told her you are married, please tell her now.
