Features
Obituaristic and marital nonsense
It was a yearly ritual. Every year, on the day her husband died, she dressed up beautifully, went on top of his grave and danced to her satisfaction. For several hours, she’d boogie up and down, style after style, until she could dance no more. She’d then descend the grave and walk home panting yet contented.
When asked by reporters why she had taken to the yearly open-air disco dancing, the widow said it was in honour of DEATH which took away her husband. “When he was alive. I never had a moment’s peace,” she said.
What an honest confession about a dead person. She minced no words. The man gave her no peace, and that was exactly what she was saying. A widow in Sikaman would dare not say that of her deceased husband. His family members would procure pick-axes, hoes and cutlasses and descend on her with red eyes and tear her to pieces.
It is traditionally not proper to speak ill of people when they are dead, but some people are beginning to feel that the custom of speaking well about even dead criminals at funerals is not helping society either.
They claim that if the living know that all their misdeeds will be recounted at their funeral when they are dead, they will endeavour not to misconduct themselves while alive. I think that is a valid point, because the dead have had it too easy.
When someone volunteered to say that a deceased fellow died of alcohol, his neck was nearly twisted. What right did he have to air the cause of death even if it was true that the guy had died of too much bitters? In any case, did he perform any post mortem to ascertain the cause of death? And for what earthly or heavenly reason did he have to associate their loved one with an evil called ALCOHOL? “Next time you talk nonsense, we shall physically weaken your jaw.
It was at a funeral when a pastor undertook to say nice words about a dead common criminal that he was corrected by the deceased’s own professional comrade.
He raised his right hand to signify that he wanted to chip in a point of order as the resident pastor spoke of how exemplary the dead man’s ways were. When no one bothered to give him the chance, he stood up and raised both hands, meaning that he had the constitutional right to slot in a rejoinder before the lies became over-whelming.
He was heavily drunk. Asked what he wanted to say, he broached the subject that first and fore-most, he would recommend that the pastor be ex-communicated from the church because he was a congenital liar, a quality unbecoming of a clergyman. He then proceeded to say the deceased was a criminal just like himself and deserved no praises in any church.
He intimated that the deceased, when he was alive, cheated him out of a booty, not once or twice, but many times, for which he never forgave him till he died. He said such a person’s body should not be brought to contaminate the holiness of a church room. Before church elders could drag him out, he had spoken his mind.
I guess if the dead man had a soul that was present where he was laid in state, the soul would have repented right in the church room.
Well there are many problems associated with modern-day funerals. One of them which is getting solved gradually is the wake-keeping palaver. The Akyem Abuakwa Traditional Council has banned wake-keepings as a means of cutting down cost of funerals in the traditional area. The Presbyterian Church is also not encouraging its members to opt for wake- keeping in any event of death of a member.
What are wake-keepings for anyway? When there were no mortuaries in the past, wake was kept because family members could not leave their dead bodies and go to bed. Keeping wake has, therefore, outlived its usefulness in present day circumstances.
A wake-keeping today is an occasion where you can get a married woman drunk and seduce her, where young girls elope with married men for amorous purposes, and where people either get married or lose their spouses. Everything is under the cover of darkness, supervised by Jimmy Satan.
A funeral that is without an elaborate wake-keeping can save at least a lot of money. A funeral that is without frivolous eating and boozing can also save a fortune. The dead must not be a burden for the living, just like getting married shouldn’t be any big deal.
The average Sikaman bride is married at least three times without any sane reason. Her Caucasian or Anglo-Saxon counterpart gets married just once in a very simply ceremony.
Why are many young men unable to marry? The fact is that they can’t. They don’t have the dough. They must KNOCK DOOR, ENGAGE and WED-three in one. By the time they are through, they are in debt to a tune of 5 million. No marriage is stable when the foundation is built on a $5 million debt.
I guess my great grandfather married his loving wife with two bottles of akpeteshie, five tubers of yam and a bottle of zomi. Check out how much I have to spend when I want wife. You can’t get a woman with akpeteshie, yam tubers and palm oil anywhere in Sikaman today. Even in the remotest cottage, they ask you to “do wedding”. It is a command, not a suggestion.
The result is that the young men can’t get married, and once they are virile and not impotent, they continue impregnating the young and unmarried girls, littering communities with kids born out of wedlock, many ending up as the street kids we see everywhere hawking barefoot instead of studying in school.
This article was first published
on Saturday, April 18, 1998
Conflict at work is more common than you might think. According to 2022 research by The Myers-Briggs Company, more than a third of the workforce reports dealing with conflict often, very often, or all the time in the workplace. The same report found that managers spend an average of four hours per week dealing with conflict, and nearly 25 per cent of people think their managers handle conflict poorly or very poorly.
Addressing a dispute might feel tense or awkward, but resolving the conflict is typically well worth it in the long run. Whether you’re trying to mediate conflict between colleagues or are directly involved, here are seven steps you can take to manage workplace conflict.
1. Don’t put it off
Facing conflict head-on is hard. However, waiting too long to address it can negatively impact your emotional well-being, focus, and the entire office environment. If you’re feeling angry, letting that emotion fester can also escalate it over time. This can make you less responsive to other points of view and make it harder to resolve the issue.
The sooner you can address the conflict, the better it will be for you, the person you disagree with, and your entire team.
2. Learn all you can about the problem
It’s important to determine the type of conflict you’re dealing with. Begin by considering the cause of the conflict. For example, ask yourself whether someone said something that upset you or if you have emotions of anger and resentment that stemmed from something that happened.
Then try to identify if it’s a task, relationship, value, or team conflict. Once you know what type of conflict it is, you can work to resolve it with specific tactics for that situation.
If you skip this step, you may waste time or escalate the situation further by trying to address issues irrelevant to the real conflict.
3. Actively listen
Listen attentively when people share their side of the story. Active listening is one of the most valuable professional skills you can possess. This type of listening involves not only hearing what the other person is saying but also listening to understand their point of view.
No matter your role in conflict, it’s easy to begin sharing your opinion with little regard for the other people involved. However, it’s important to learn about all sides of a disagreement to make well-informed decisions before drawing conclusions.
To reach a resolution, you must step back and prioritize listening over talking. Ultimately, that will encourage the other person to do the same when it’s your turn to speak. –source: betterup.com
Today, I focus on the Temple Of Praise Ministries International (TOP Church) in Helsinki, as I continue my description of personalities or institutions and their accomplishments as members of the Ghanaian Diaspora in Finland.
The TOP Church in Finland has seen significant strides and accomplishments that must be made known to the public. 
Some history
The Church was established in Finland in September 2016. Since its inception, it has steadily grown both spiritually and numerically, by the grace of God, as disclosed to me by Mr Matthew Anini Twumasi, the Presiding Elder of TOP’s branch in Finland. The TOP Church has other branches across Africa, Europe, and America.
The Church in Finland was founded with a vision to create a welcoming and dynamic community where people could experience God’s love and grace (see, www.topchurchfinland.org). According to Presiding Elder Matthew, the TOP Church operates within a unique environment where Christianity coexists with what is seen as a largely secular society.
Despite this, he submits, there are significant opportunities for outreach, unity, and demonstrating the love of Christ through service and community engagement.
Activities
Church services at the TOP Church are typically held on Sundays for the main worship. In addition, there are mid-week prayer sessions, Saturday prayer services, and a half-night service held on the last Friday of every month. “We also organise quarterly programs”, Elder Matthew added.
His impression of the Church so far has been positive. “It is a vibrant and welcoming community where members are committed to worship, fellowship, and supporting one another in faith”, he stated.
In sum, Elder Matthew said the Church continues to grow by God’s grace. “We remain hopeful and committed to spreading the Gospel, strengthening the faith of our members, and making a positive impact in society”, he continued.
Achievements
The TOP Church has a number of achievements and achievements. Some of the strengths include strong community bonds, cultural diversity, and deep commitment to spiritual growth.
I also remember that during the COVID-19 period, I heard that the TOP Church was one such bodies that hugely supported its members and others to cope with the situation.
According to Elder Matthew, the challenges facing the church include “adapting to cultural differences, engaging the younger generation, expanding outreach in a secular society, and securing a permanent place of worship”.
Role in the Ghanaian community in Finland
The TOP Church plays a prominent role as a religious group that serves Ghanaian migrants and others in the Finnish society.
Thus, the TOP Church is a religious body for Ghanaian migrants in Finland and other nationalities who want to worship with them for diversity and better intercultural and multicultural understanding.
The Church also has mechanisms in place to support its members who are bereaved as a way to commiserate with them in times of death and funerals.
The Ghanaian community has played a vital role in the growth of the Church. Their strong sense of fellowship, dedication to worship, and active participation have helped build a solid foundation and attract others to the ministry, according to Elder Matthew.
Integration
By its activities, the TOP Church is helping to ensure integration of its members well into the Finish society.
This is important since social interaction and citizens’ well-being are an important part of the integration process.
The role of migrant associations and groups such as TOP Church acting as bridge-builders for the integration and inclusion of migrants through participation in the decision making process and by acting as a representative voice is highly appreciated in Finland. Thank you!
GHANA MATTERS column appears fortnightly. Written in simple, layman’s terms, it concentrates on matters about Ghana and beyond. It focuses on everyday life issues relating to the social, cultural, economic, religious, political, health, sports, youth, gender, etc. It strives to remind us all that Ghana comes first. The column also takes a candid look at the meanings and repercussions of our actions, especially those things we take for granted or even ignore. There are key Ghanaian values we should uphold rather than disregard with impunity. We should not overlook the obvious. We need to search for the hidden or deeply embedded values and try to project them.
With Dr Perpetual Crentsil
