Obaa Yaa
Never again in my life
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I took life easy from the beginning and things were moving on well for which reason I was happy.
I was always in the company of my friends, and we did things that pleased us and considered them as one of the best options in the world.
Nobody mattered to us and we did not hesitate to decline the pieces of advice given to us over the period.
To the best of our knowledge, we knew more than those who claimed to advise us on how best we should conduct our lives.
A few months after I had started moving with Frank, I discovered to my surprise that I was pregnant.
Since I was not prepared for pregnancy and its related problems at that time, my fervent prayer was to see my menses flow to gladen my heart, but that did not happen.
I was, therefore, compelled to carry the unwanted pregnancy and was eventually delivered of a baby boy without the support of my lover who had earlier showered loving words and a few gifts on me.
Having gone through this condition single- handedly without any support from him, what should I do?
Should I revenge in any way conceivable or should I report to the Domestic Violence and Victim Support Unit (DOVVSU)?
Maame, Accra.
Dear Maame,
You have done well by laying bare the facts in your narration.
Having read through your letter, I am tempted to say that you are your own teacher and have taken useful lesson from the problem you have gone through.
Let this be your guide through life and do not hesitate to admonish the youth whenever you get the least opportunity.
Try to contact the parents of your lover and force them to live up to their parental responsibilities. This man should not shirk his responsibilities only for the child to grow and he will come forward to claim him.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.
Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.
This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I has now become a family affair.
I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.
He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.
Baaba, Apam
Dear Baaba,
Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage.
Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.
Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.
You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.
On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200.
He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.
Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.
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