Obaa Yaa
My wife is building secretly
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We have been married for the past 15 years. Although our marital journey has not been easy, I love my wife.
At a point in our marriage, I betrayed my wife by impregnating a co-worker. I asked for forgiveness from my wife and she accepted by apology.
Recently, I discovered that my wife had built two houses and rented them without my knowledge.
The most painful thing is that she has willed these houses to the children which I found in our wardrobe.
When I confronted her she claimed that the reason for her behaviour was because she had lost trust in me after I impregnated a co-worker.
I am confused. What should I do to win her trust?
Jacob, Osu.
Dear Jacob,
This is an interesting letter which will serve as a useful lesson for couples.
Marriage basically thrives on love, trust and a great deal of tolerance. Couples must always ensure that these fundamentals are safeguarded in order to keep the marriage safe.
Unfortunately, you have grossly abused the trust of your wife and have called for this negative response from her. Judging by her behaviour, this is the best way for her to retaliate.
Though it is unfortunate that she has built houses without your knowledge, you should know that you have called for the tune and must, therefore, be prepared to dance according to it.
Secondly, you must be grateful that she has willed the houses to your children.
I am in my final year in the university. My elder sister has been very supportive after the death of our parents.
My sister has a boyfriend who visits often. Anytime he comes around, she wonders why I don’t entertain him and why I suddenly find an excuse to leave the room. She takes it as me being cold, even jealous, and it angers her more than I can even imagine.
She has no idea about what is going on behind her back. He has asked me out on several occasions and looks at me in a lustful manner.
But my problem is that I never told my sister the real reason I avoid her boyfriend. I have kept my distance, not out of hate for her or for him, but because I carry a secret that would break her heart.
Princess, Tema.
Dear Princess,
Why are you keeping this away from your sister? As long as you continue to live under the same roof with your sister, tell her about her boyfriend’s behaviour.
Have you by any chance confided in any relative? I’ll advise you to open up to someone, at least to take the weight off your shoulder.
Act fast before the situation exacerbates.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 23 years who lives in a compound house around Kasoa in the Central Region. I live with my auntie.
We are not always at home because she spends most of the time at the market due to her business, and I am mostly on campus.
One sunny afternoon, I overheard some tenants talking about another who takes her bath in a basin and throws the water away. We have two big bathrooms, but just because she doesn’t want to scrub, she has refused to bathe there.
Although she is usually not around due to her work as a nurse, it doesn’t warrant her to do as she pleases. We have spoken to the landlord about it, but she seems unconcerned. What should I do?
Beatrice, Accra
Dear Beatrice,
I am surprised that your landlord seems unperturbed.
Have you considered having a conversation with the tenant to find out why she ignores the chores? She does not seem bothered about the kind of perception the other tenants have about her.
Why would a young lady who is a nurse and an advocate for healthy living be this lazy and unconcerned about her surroundings?
No excuse should be tolerated just because she’s a nurse and mostly not around.
