Obaa Yaa
My decision to marry worries my parents
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Though I love my girlfriend and would like to marry her, my parents are not in favour of our relationship.
We have been in a relationship for five years and have decided to marry despite the disagreement of my parents.
My parents used several tricks including influencing many relatives to discourage me from going ahead to marry my lover but all have failed since I will go by my plan to marry this lady.
One of the most recent deceit was to discourage me on the grounds that the lady cannot conceive due to her previous relationship.
It is quite interesting to note that my girlfriend has not had any previous relationship to justify their claims that she is incapable of conceiving.
Despite all problems, I am still willing to marry this pretty lady and build my family with her.
Should I go ahead with my decision?
Samuel, Accra.
Dear Samuel,
Your problem is a general one which a lot of youth are confronted with.
Though marriage is contracted between two lovers, the consent or the approval of parents is important for peace to prevail.
Despite the differences in opinion between you and your parents, there is the need to smoke the peace pipe so that you can enjoy their support, love and care. With this, your wife- to-be will feel happy in the marriage.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
