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Mothers cannot wait
Last Sunday was Mothers’ Day worldwide and mothers all over the globe were saluted and honoured. All kinds of gifts were lavished on them. In fact, mothers’ day is a far, far bigger deal than fathers’ day. Whereas mothers get gifts as grand as houses, cars, jewellery, and other valuable presents depending on the financial clout of the giver, gifts for fathers seem like child’s play. They appear like an afterthought.
For example, if a mother gets some pieces of wax prints and/or jewellery, a father may get a tie or a card or a towel. By conservative estimates, if GHc 1,500 is spent on a mother, expenditure on a father may amount to about GHc 600 or less. I am not jealous as a father. I understand.
In fact, my mother’s people, the Fantes, have a proverb that says: “Egya kyew na onnwe,” which loosely translates to: “The father fries (the fish or whatever) but does not taste it.”In other words, men must provide for their wives and children first, before they think of themselves.
But, in recent times, the roles have been reversed in many instances. More and more women have taken over the responsibilities of men, not because they are “too know”or “sabbe, sabbe” as Ghanaians say in their local parlance. The fact of the matter is that some men are not pushing themselves hard enough, and by nature, women cannot sit comfortably by while things go haywire.
For all their diligence, empathy, protection, and love, mothers deserve all the gifts and every bit of the encomiums showered on them, and more. But mothers cannot wait; they cannot wait until mothers’ day before they are recognised; they cannot wait until they are dead and gone before they are honoured with a lavish funeral.
Mothers have historically been the burden bearers for humanity. Right from conception, they carry their babies for nine months. Some of them are abandoned the moment their men hear they are pregnant, pregnant carrying the babies of these capricious men which they irresponsibly make out of self-gratification not out of love or duty.
When they are threatened to abort the baby or face abandonment, most mothers would rather keep the pregnancy and nurture their unborn child by any means possible. With no support in a situation like this, the courage of mothers moves into top gear. They would do all kinds of jobs just to make sure the unborn child is safe, nourished, and protected.
With that heavy load, and a heart broken by a selfish, irresponsible man, a mother would do everything to ensure that she and her unborn baby survive. She would sell ice water, oranges, foodstuff, her clothes, and virtually anything people would buy. I forgot “bofroat.” I hear it is “ball float,” coined by the Fantes from the way the doughnuts float in oil while being fried.
A mother’s bowels of compassion know no boundaries. Can you imagine what the mother of Jesus went through as they crucified her Son over trumped-up charges? While men, His disciples for that matter, were nowhere to be found, with the exception of John, Mary stood at the foot of the cross at a position where her Son would make eye contact with her so that she would urge Him on to stay strong. Her bowels were churning at the sight of her tortured Son, but she did it all the same.
Because of the caring attitude of mothers, God Himself uses feminine metaphors to describe His attributes. Like a hen, He says He will cover His people with His feathers, and under His wings shall they trust. When Jesus was about to be crucified, He lamented over Jerusalem for her waywardness saying, He would have loved to protect the city under His wings, but the inhabitants would not let Him. These images depict the warm nature of God, a trait associated with mothers.
There is no warrior like a mother. When it comes to protecting her children, she fights with the claws of an eagle, the paws of a lioness or a bear, and the sting of a scorpion. That is how fierce a mother can be in the defence of her children, though wayward they may be. On top of that mothers have a good deal of ESP, (extrasensory perception) by which they smell danger afar off and act accordingly to nip it in the bud.
Just watch how a hen fends off a marauding hawk skirmishing to snatch one of her chicks. With the eyes of an eagle, she sees the danger afar off and puts herself in battle mode, ever ready to fight to the hilt until she secures her territory for the safety of her vulnerable chicks. In that sense, too, God compares Himself to a mother bear. He says like a bear robbed of her cubs, He would attack those attacking her little ones and rip them open.
Talking of ESP, I remember when I was a teenager, my mum warned me about a friend of mine, a person whose trustworthiness I had no reason to question. Here was a young, brilliant, handsome, jovial guy from a good home. He was just affable, but for some strange reason unclear to fathom, my mother saw him differently. She saw beyond the surface and told me my friend resembled a murderer.
As boys usually do, my friends and I used to gather at our house or in another friend’s house and go out to have fun. Those were the days when attending secondary school in Cape Coast was the best thing that could happen to a student. It was just a thing of joy. During vacations, some Accra guys would stay over at our place, or return during occasions like the famed Fetu Afahye festival and enjoy themselves.
One day, my mum told me in Fante:“Wo yonko yi, os3 wudzinyi,” meaning, “This friend of yours looks like a murderer.”I did not take kindly to that, but time proved her right. A bunch of us went on a night out and were returning on foot along a bridge that spanned the Fosu Lagoon. I do not know what kind of spirit came over him but, suddenly, my friend held me and threatened that if I dared him, he would throw me into the lagoon. And he knew swimming was not my forte.
He was heavier and stronger than me, and he actually dragged me closer to the edge of the lagoon. I instantly remembered my mum’s warning and knew if I died that young, it would be due to my foolishness in thinking I knew better, and consequently defying my mother’s instinctive warning.
With these thoughts racing through my mind, I behaved sensibly, keeping calm until the evil that came over him retreated. On hindsight, I know that my mother was praying for me. I never told her what happened, but I advised myself.
I recall that when we were growing up, mothers who had been delivered newly of their babies, had a custom of wearing white clothes with beautiful footwear and white beads as necklace, and visiting maternity and childcare clinics to weigh their babies and monitor other aspects of their vital signs.
Imagine a mother who was abandoned by her man and struggled to have the baby. She just could not afford the luxury of changing clothes to celebrate the joy of having a baby safely after all the problems. Some still had their husbands, but they were living on hard times. Whatever the reason, the sorrowful mother braced herself for the sneers of the public and did what she had to do, money or no money.
Some of us were cry babies who never allowed our mothers any good sleep at night. Even if our fathers were around, they would be snoring. Our mothers understood the meaning of every kind of cry we let out. If we were sick, they knew. If we were hungry, they knew.
When we messed ourselves and felt uncomfortable, our mothers knew even if there were no smell to alert them. They just knew and took care of it. Even if we were angry about something as little as we were, our mothers understood.
Despite all their tireless work, some mothers are reaping a whirlwind. Their own children have risen up against them for so many reasons. For some, their snobbery of their mothers is due to lies fed them by fake prophets that their mother is a witch.
Others are influenced by their tigresses, wives whose say is final. There are some, including men and women, who now see their mothers as villagers whose visits embarrass them before their friends in the city. What? You are ashamed of your mother? I do not blame you. Now, you think you have arrived. And you have no clue how you made it this far.
Honour your father and mother that your days may be prolonged. This is the only commandment with a promise. The reverse holds equally true. And that is, if you do not honour your father and mother, your days would be shortened. Period! Honouring mothers should be regular. Mothers cannot wait until …
Contact: teepeejubilee@yahoo.co.uk
By Tony Prempeh
The driver stopped the vehicle at the gate of the large, fenced property along the Nsawam Highway, and Kakraba stepped out to meet the several workers who had gathered to wait for him.
He greeted them and went straight to the point.
“Gentlemen, I am glad to see that you have almost completed the clearing of the land. I’m happy to report that we have concluded all arrangements with Nana Serebour, and construction of the palace will start in a few days.
“I will need you to go and level the ground, and then come back to start this project. Some workers from a construction company will come and join us.
“My plan is to build twenty houses in four months. Then we will do twenty more until we reach two hundred.
“I am relying on you to help me deliver good-quality work to satisfy our clients and, as I have already indicated to you, I will reward you for your work.”
After an hour’s discussion, he closed the meeting and moved to drive away. Wofa Yaw drew closer.
“Director, can you please spare me five minutes? I would like to discuss a small issue.”
“Why, Wofa Yaw? Your wife has threatened to leave you?”
“No, Director. My wife will never leave me. This concerns a young niece of mine.”
“I hope it’s something I can help with. Please sit in the car and let me hear you.”
“Boss, my niece, Beesiwa, is a polytechnic graduate, very beautiful and with very good character.
“Unfortunately, her parents virtually forced her into a relationship with an idiot based in the US, which affected her badly. She has now recovered from that experience and, Boss, I am respectfully asking if you would find a job for her.
“I promise you that you will never regret it.”
“Well, Wofa Yaw, let me meet her and speak with her. I may be able to help, maybe not in the way you expect, but let me meet her.
“I will not be back here for another week, but I will be at the office throughout next week. You can come with her.”
On Monday morning, Wofa Yaw and Beesiwa were seated at the office by nine o’clock. Three young ladies welcomed them warmly, offered them soft drinks and assured them that Kakraba would be there shortly.
They then returned to their desks and sat behind computers with large screens displaying various building designs.
Kakraba walked in and greeted them warmly. After chatting briefly with the three ladies, he ushered Wofa Yaw and Beesiwa into his office.
“Director, this is my niece, Beesiwa. I mentioned her to you when you came to Nsawam.”
“Yes, indeed. Madam Beesiwa, you are very beautiful, just as your uncle said. Wofa Yaw is my colleague.
“We have just started a building project that will take about three to four years. He mentioned that you have a small problem, so I said I would like to meet you and see how I can help.
“So, Beesiwa, please tell me a little about yourself.”
Beesiwa described her childhood, her school experience, her brief work at the bank and the nasty episode with Sammy Abrokwa, which shattered her peaceful life. She also explained how she had been recovering from the experience.
“I am really sorry to hear this,” Kakraba said. “Now, here is what we are going to do.
“We are a small but very busy company. The three ladies out there spend most of the day on site and come back to report on their work in the morning.
“I have three main projects. The big one is an estate project in Nsawam, where your uncle is one of my main colleagues. I need a personal assistant who can take care of my activities, especially when I am not in town.
“Now, we will have to start with trust. Based on what I know about Wofa Yaw, and based on what you yourself have told me, I think we can start on a sound basis.
“So, Wofa Yaw will take you to my home. You can move into one of the four guest rooms.”
“Sir, I have taken some computer lessons, and I have even done graphics and web design,” Beesiwa said.
“Fantastic! I will give you a good phone and a laptop. I will also arrange computer lessons for you.”
“Now, Wofa Yaw, take her home. My sister, Kuukuwa, will meet you and show you around, and then you can return to Koforidua.
“When would you like to start work?”
“Sir, I would like to start today, but I would need to go and bring my things.”
“No problem. Take a taxi to my house, meet my sister, and let me know what you decide.”
Later that day, Kakraba and the three ladies met with some bank officials to conclude the sale of the three buildings at Adabraka.
They closed at five-thirty and, after rewarding the ladies for their hard work, Kakraba got home just after dark.
He was surprised to find Kuukuwa and Beesiwa sitting at the table enjoying supper.
“What’s happening here?” he asked. “Beesiwa, I thought you would return to Koforidua.”
“She changed her mind,” Kuukuwa said. “We went to the mall and bought a few things for her. Then we came back to cook. She has made some nice changes to your bedroom and cooked a couple of interesting dishes. Sit down; we will serve you.”
“Well, I certainly can’t refuse that. It’s been a busy day.
“So, what’s the plan now? Will Beesiwa go to Koforidua tomorrow, gather her things together and come down?”
“No, I will stay here for a while,” Beesiwa replied. “Kuukuwa bought me the things I need, so I may go back next week. I’m ready to start work. What would you like me to start with?”
“Well, you can come to the office tomorrow morning, meet the three girls and get a feel for what we do.
“Since you are living here, at least for now, we can discuss the plans for the next few weeks.
“Sometimes there are gaps when I travel up north. You can take care of things from now. I think the girls would like having someone like you around.”
By Ekow de Heer
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A frequent question following breast surgery is whether human tissue possesses the regenerative capacity to restore an excised organ.
From a strict physiological standpoint, a completely removed breast cannot regrow. Unlike certain organisms that can regenerate complex limbs or organs, adult human tissues—particularly specialised glandular structures—lack the cellular machinery required to rebuild an entire organ after its total surgical removal.
Instead, the body heals the surgical site through processes such as scar tissue formation and re-epithelialisation rather than complete cellular regeneration.
What a mastectomy actually removes
To understand why natural tissue regeneration does not occur, it is important to examine the surgical scope of a mastectomy.
Depending on the type of procedure and the medical reason for surgery, a mastectomy may involve the removal of:
Glandular architecture: The milk-producing lobules and ducts that form the functional core of the mammary gland.
Adipose tissue: The fatty tissue that contributes to breast volume, projection and contour.
Other breast tissue: The extent of tissue removal varies according to the type of mastectomy and the need to achieve appropriate surgical clearance.
Because specialised breast structures are physically removed, the body does not rebuild a complete mammary gland. Instead, healing occurs through tissue repair and scar formation.
Distinguishing residual tissue from “regrowth”
Patients or observers may notice changes in the chest area after surgery, sometimes leading to misconceptions about tissue regeneration.
Skin- and nipple-sparing procedures
Modern breast surgery may preserve the outer skin envelope or, in selected cases, the nipple-areola complex. Small amounts of breast tissue may remain depending on the surgical technique. Any changes in remaining tissue due to hormonal fluctuations represent residual tissue responding to the body, rather than the regrowth of a completely removed breast.
Adipose accumulation
Weight gain after surgery can increase the amount of subcutaneous fat across the chest wall. However, this is part of general body fat distribution and does not represent the regeneration of a mammary gland.
Modern reconstructive pathways
Because a completely removed breast does not naturally regenerate, modern medicine offers reconstructive options aimed at restoring physical symmetry, contour and body image.
The two main approaches are implant-based reconstruction and autologous, or tissue-based, reconstruction.
Implant-based reconstruction
Implant-based reconstruction uses synthetic medical devices, typically filled with silicone gel or saline, to rebuild the breast mound following a mastectomy.
The two-stage process: This approach may begin with the placement of a temporary tissue expander to gradually create space and stretch the surrounding tissues. A later procedure may then be performed to place a permanent implant.
Recovery profile: Implant-based reconstruction generally involves a shorter initial surgery and recovery period compared with procedures that require tissue to be harvested from another part of the body.
Long-term considerations: Breast implants are not lifetime devices and require ongoing medical monitoring. Some patients may need additional procedures over time because of complications or changes in the implant or surrounding tissue.
Autologous or tissue-based reconstruction
Autologous reconstruction uses the patient’s own living tissue to create a new breast mound. Tissue may be transferred from another part of the body, commonly the lower abdomen, using procedures such as a DIEP flap.
Natural look and feel: Because the reconstruction uses living tissue, it can provide a natural warmth, texture and softness. The tissue may also change with the patient’s body weight over time.
Long-term durability: Once healing is complete, autologous reconstruction can provide a long-lasting result without the need to replace an implant. However, some patients may still require further procedures.
Complex surgery: This option usually involves a longer operation and recovery period. In microsurgical procedures, surgeons may need to reconnect tiny blood vessels to establish blood flow to the transferred tissue.
Direct comparison
When choosing between these two reconstructive pathways, patients and their surgical teams must consider several physical, medical and lifestyle factors.
Surgical burden: Implant surgery is generally less invasive, while flap reconstruction involves surgery at both the chest and the donor site.
Foreign material versus native tissue: Implants involve the use of a medical device, while autologous reconstruction uses the patient’s own tissue.
Recovery: The recovery timelines and rehabilitation requirements differ significantly between the two procedures.
Recovery and physical rehabilitation
Recovering from breast reconstruction requires patience, careful pacing and, in some cases, structured physical rehabilitation.
Because implant-based and autologous tissue-flap procedures involve different surgical techniques, their healing timelines and physical therapy milestones can vary considerably.
Understanding these differences is important for patients considering reconstruction, as the choice involves more than restoring physical appearance. It also requires careful consideration of recovery, long-term monitoring, lifestyle and individual medical needs.
Part 2 will examine recovery timelines, physical therapy milestones and other factors patients should consider when choosing between reconstructive options.
By Robert Ekow Grimmond-Thompson
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