Obaa Yaa
Married woman finds me suitable
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a graduate, completed the mandatory National Service but I have no job. A married woman was stranded when her car broke down in the middle of the road and I assisted in fixing the problem to her delight.
The following day, she called my phone to express her gratitude for the help I offered her the previous day. Ever since, the conservation continued and one day she invited me for launch.
She occasionally called to find out how I was doing and always asked if there was any help that she could offer.
One day, we coincidentally met at the funeral of a friend and she suggested that we go elsewhere for lunch at a lodge. There we had some drinks and food after which she complained of headache and subsequently booked a room to enable her to rest a few minutes before leaving the place. I quickly arranged for a painkiller from a nearby pharmacy, gave it to her and waited for her to recuperate.
She pleaded that I should not leave her alone in the room but stay a little longer. I suggested that she should call her husband to come to her aid but she declined, saying that she would like to be left alone.
After some minutes, she asked for a bottle of water and when I took the water to her she held my hand firmly and drew me to her on the bed. As I struggled to extricate myself from her grips, she held me tighter and whispered into my ears that she loved me and the unfortunate happened.
This incident was followed by many others at the least opportunity we had.
Though she is someone’s wife, she gives me joy and supports me financially since I am not working. I find it difficult to let her go off my grips because of the immense help she is offering me. I am beginning to be afraid of being caught by her husband and disgraced.
What should I do?
Kofi, Accra.
Dear Kofi,
You are treading on dangerous grounds and the earlier you quit this devilish attitude and spare your life, the better it will be for you.
Going out with someone’s wife is a deadly sin, nasty, dirty, unpardonable and could easily cause your life.
Remember that everybody will definitely condemn your attitude because it is not right.
The danger is that, having indulged in illicit sex for some period will make you not feel remorse of the act.
There is no need to depend on this woman for long since the ball will soon be let out of the bag, and you will soon be caught.
How will you feel if someone does this to your wife?
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.