Relationship
Marriage is a social union
Marriage is a social relationship between two people that is sanctioned by the law, religion, or social conventions. It is an official commitment made by two people to share their lives, obligations, and resources while residing as a couple.
Every culture on the globe values and strongly approves of marriage as a social bond or union. Marriage has been a social institution in numerous forms spanning human history. It is considered as a way to build social ties between families or clans in some cultures, while it is recognised as a private relationship between two people in others.
The institution of marriage is heavily regulated by religious institutions since it is often connected to religious customs in many civilisations.
Mostly, a marriage takes place amidst happiness and celebrations for the couple, their family, and loved ones.
Being a social institution, marriage encourages the union of two utterly different people from diverse socioeconomic backgrounds to create a family. Marriage is a partnership where trust is developed over time as dedicated spouses put their personal interests aside for the benefit of their spouse and learn how to maintain a healthy relationship.
Marriage is a social union that establishes rights and obligations between the spouses, between spouses and their children, and between the spouses and their in-laws.
Marriage has several functions in society, including defining the rights and obligations of the spouses, recognising the couple’s dedication to each other on a social and legal level, and managing the couple’s sexual behaviour and procreation. In addition to providing a framework for arranging household and financial affairs, marriage also offers a means of socialising and raising children.
It is crucial in creating a solid foundation for rearing and caring for children. In terms of education, social well-being, and health, research has demonstrated that children raised in married homes typically achieve greater results than children raised in single-parent or cohabiting relationships.
Marriage has obstacles, despite how significant it is. The institution of marriage has come under fire and been the subject of debate, particularly in relation to topics like gender roles, sexuality, and the right of same-sex couples to get married.
In many nations, divorce rates have also increased, underscoring the challenges that many couples encounter in sustaining a committed, long-term partnership. As society conventions and ideals have changed over time, marriage has undergone considerable adjustments.
Today, marriage is often seen as a partnership between equals in which both parties contribute to the union and shoulder equal responsibility. A growing acceptance of many types of love and commitment is reflected in the legal recognition of same-sex marriage in some nations.
Despite the growing trend in same-sex marriages, almost all African and Asian countries vehemently abhor the idea of same-sex marriage because of religious / spiritual, cultural and social reasons.
Nevertheless, the Christian perspective maintains that getting married is not only a social or legal commitment; it is a spiritual union that is based on the grace and love of God. Christians contend that a husband and wife can deepen their love for God and for each other by means of marriage.
The need for sexual purity and loyalty inside the marriage bond is also emphasized in the Christian perspective on marriage. Christians believe that faithfulness is essential to upholding a good and solid relationship, and that intimate sexual activity is a gift from the LORD that deserves to be embraced within the framework of marriage.
In general, the Christian perspective on marriage as a social union is grounded in the conviction that it is a holy covenant between a man and a woman, established by God, and that it is intended to reflect God’s love and grace in the world.
To be continued …
Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist). https://counselorprinceass.wixsite.com/edu-counseling-psych
COUNSELOR PRINCE& ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAINING INSTITUTE)
Relationship
Tips to improve family relationships
There is nothing like family. The people that are related by blood and marriage are expected to be our closest allies, greatest sources of love and support.
Too often, however, interactions with family are filled with misunderstanding and resentment, bickering and badgering.
Here are some tips to help bring family members closer
Take care of your health if you hope to take care of anyone else. The more demanding of your time your family is, the more you need to fit in exercise. Perhaps you and your family can seek out ways to exercise together.
1. Listen if you expect to be heard. Lack of communication is the loudest complaint in most families. The answer to “Why won’t they listen to me?” may be simply “You’re not listening to them.”
2. Teach emotional choice. Manage your moods by letting all feelings be OK, but not all behaviours. Model behavior that respects and encourages the feelings and rights of others yet make it clear that we have a choice about what to do with what we feel.
3. Teach generosity by receiving as well as giving. Giving and receiving are parts of the same loving continuum. If we don’t give, we find it hard to receive, and if we can’t receive, we don’t really have much to give. This is why selflessness carried to extremes is of little benefits to others.
4. Take responsibility for what you communicate silently. The very young and old are especially sensitive to nonverbal cues. More than our words, tone of voice, posture (body language), and facial expressions convey our feelings. We have to listen to our tone of voice and look at ourselves in pictures and in the mirror to assess our emotional congruency. Loving words coming through clenched teeth don’t feel loving—they feel confusing.
5. Don’t try to solve problems for your loved ones. Caring for your family doesn’t mean taking charge of their problems, giving unsolicited advice, or protecting them from their own emotions. Let them know their own strengths and allow them to ask you for what they need.
6. Make a lasting impression through actions. Your values will be communicated by your actions, no matter what you say. Be an example, not a nag.
7. Acknowledge your errors to everyone, including younger family members. Saying you’re sorry when you hurt someone you love, models humility and emotional integrity. You can demonstrate that no one is perfect, but everyone can learn at any age. Apologising proves you can forgive yourself and makes it easier to forgive others.
8. Discover what each person’s unique needs are. You can’t assume that your grandmother needs the same signs of love as your three-year-old or that either one will have the same needs next year. When in doubt, ask!
9. Be generous in expressing love. Everyone in a family (especially young children) needs the emotional reassurance of loving words, gestures, and looks. Those who demand the least emotional attention may need it most.
Relationship
Building trust in relationships and marriages
Trust is the glue that holds relationships and marriages together. Without it, even the strongest bonds can crumble.
As a couple navigates the ups and downs of life, trust serves as the foundation upon which their love, commitment, and loyalty are built. But what happens when trust is broken?
How can couples work to rebuild and strengthen this essential component of their relationship?
Trust is not just a feeling; it is a choice. It is a decision to be vulnerable, to be open, and to believe in the goodness of your partner. When trust is present, relationships flourish.
Communication becomes easier, conflicts are resolved more efficiently, and intimacy deepens. Trust allows couples to feel secure, to know that they can rely on each other through life’s challenges.
Signs of trust issues
So, how do you know if trust is an issue in your relationship? Look out for these signs:
– Suspicion and jealousy
– Defensiveness and accusations
– Lack of communication or withholding information
– Dishonesty or hiding the truth
– Emotional distance or disconnection
How to build trust
Fortunately, trust can be built and rebuilt. Here are some practical steps couples can take:
1. Communicate openly: Communication is the key to any successful relationship. Be honest, transparent, and open with your partner. Share your thoughts, feelings, and desires in a respectful and empathetic manner.
2. Be reliable: Follow through on your commitments. Show your partner that you are dependable and responsible.
3. Show vulnerability: Be willing to be vulnerable with your partner. Share your fears, hopes, and dreams with them.
4. Practice forgiveness: Let go of grudges and resentments. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or condoning hurtful behavior, but rather releasing the negative emotions associated with it.
5. Cultivate intimacy: Intimacy is not just physical; it’s also emotional. Make time for regular date nights, meaningful conversations, and affectionate gestures.
Rebuilding trust
If trust has been broken, it is essential to work on rebuilding it. This process takes time, effort, and commitment from both partners. Here are some steps to take:
1. Acknowledge the hurt: Recognise the pain caused by the breach of trust. Acknowledge your partner’s feelings and validate their experience.
2. Identify the cause: Understand the reasons behind the breach of trust. Is it a lack of communication, infidelity, or something else? Identifying the root cause can help you address the issue more effectively.
3. Work together: Rebuilding trust requires a joint effort. Work together to establish new patterns of behaviour, communicate openly, and rebuild intimacy.
4. Seek help: If needed, seek the help of a couples therapist or counselor. A professional can provide guidance and support as you work to rebuild trust. Counselor Prince & Associates Consult (CPAC) can be helpful in that vein.
Building trust in a relationship or marriage takes work, commitment, and patience. It is a journey that requires effort from both partners. By communicating openly, being reliable, showing vulnerability, practicing forgiveness, and cultivating intimacy, couples can strengthen their bond and build a foundation of trust that will last a lifetime. Remember, trust is not something that can be demanded; it is something that must be earned and nurtured. With time, effort, and dedication, couples can build a strong, trusting relationship that brings joy, happiness, and fulfillment to their lives.
To be continued …
Source: Excerpts from “COURTSHIP MATTERS: Keys to a Fulfilling Lasting Marriage” Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Lecturer, Published Author, and Marriage Counsellor).
