Obaa Yaa
Husband impregnates house help
Dear ObaaYaa,
I was a house-help close to 10 years with my madam and her husband. I was responsible for raising their three children from their infancy till they entered the Junior High School.
My madam and her husband were pleased with my services and, therefore, entrusted more responsibilities into my care.
Initially, my madam invited the younger sister to take care of her children whenever she made her foreign trips. I accorded the sister the same measure of respect and assistance on those occasions.
After some time, her younger sister also got married and, therefore, could not provide support to her sister.
As the foreign trips continued, the mantle finally fell on me to take charge of the house.
Though my master has been making advances at me, l managed to turn down his requests.
One day, when my madam was away and the children were asleep, my master asked me to serve him with a bottle of beer and also take the only bottle of coke in the fridge.
l felt dizzy ten minutes after drinking the coke and by the time l woke up,my master was beside me in my bed.
Having discovered this, lwas terrified and suddenly jumped out ofthe bed, but he managed to get hold of me and one can imagine the conclusion.
After this first encounter, he made it a routine to make love to me. He gave me a lot of money in a way to compensate meand warned me not to tell anybody about it.
l am pregnant and he is forcing me to abort the pregnancy because my madam will not take kindly to it when she discovers it.
What should l do?
Memouna , Accra.
Dear Memouna,
Since two wrongs do not make a right, I will advise you to keep the pregnancy because the harm hasalready been done so you must prepare your mind to give birth.
Your continued stay in the house will expose you so it will be better for you to leave the house as early as possible. In this case your master should support you with money to settle in a different house in order to protect his marriage.
Make sure the relationships ends here after you have been delivered of your child otherwise the embarrassment will be too much.
Obaa Yaa
Let’s protect the girl child
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a mother whose children are all girls. I am having sleepless nights over cases of little girls being defiled lately.
I wished to give birth to boys because my parents gave birth to only girls.
I am getting worried with the way the girl child is taken advantage of by unscrupulous men and it appears these men are going unpunished.
What can I do to protect my children? We must begin to see actions geared at saving the girl child.
Araba,
Takoradi.
Dear Araba,
YOU must begin to have very frank talk with your little girls. Tell them about sex, and tell them it is wrong for little girls to engage in it.
Tell them that it is wrong for anyone, most especially strangers, to touch or fondle their private parts and should not hesitate to report such cases.
With the children who are too young to speak properly (below three years), make it a point to bath them yourself either in the morning or evening and observe their private parts to make sure are well.
Do not leave them in the company of boys or men for long periods without checking on them.
Obaa Yaa
My mum wants me to end my relationship
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 26 year old driver, and she is 24 and an apprentice seamstress. We have known each other for three years.
I was having launch when my girl entered with another man but she didn’t see me.
When I asked who the man was, she said he was from her hometown and was invited by him for a drink. I just slapped her and she left.
Obaa, I had seen this man with my girlfriend another night and when I questioned them, he tried to fight.
I slapped him and he went to the police station to report that someone had assaulted him and stolen his necklace, watch and an amount of money.
The matter got to my mother and I was asked to pay Gh¢8,000 for assault.
My mother says, I should break up with the girl but I love her and can’t do that. What should I do?
Efe, Mallam.
*****
Dear Isaac,
Your girlfriend needs to be talked to instead of slaps. Let her understand that you felt threatened by the man who is not a mutual friend to the two of you.
You must explain to her that even though this man is from her town, she should have introduced him to you and also make an effort not to be with him at places and times that arouse suspicion.
This would be the first part of saving your relationship. The second part is that you need to control your temper as violence would always land you in trouble.
Finally you need to reassure your mother that you would never act the way you did again.
