Obaa Yaa
How can I get over this?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We have been in a relationship over one year. Though things have been moving on well, I have the feeling that this gentleman will one day patch up with his ex-girlfriend and he will dump me.
The fear has come about because his ex-girlfriend visits him at the end of every month to collect money for the upkeep of their child.
Although he keeps assuring me that he loves me, I have my doubts and not convinced that he is sincere and will keep to his words.
I am often worried whenever he travelled out of Accra on a business trip. I do not trust him because of his attitude and his utterances of late.
How can I get over it?
Nana Adzoa- Tema.
Dear Nana Adzoa,
Love thrives on trust and tolerance,therefore, if these ingredients are absent in a marriage,the future becomes uncertain.
You sound as if your boyfriend has given you a reason not to trust him. If you keep on disturbing him, it will drive him away.
Your husband should be careful since his ex- girlfriend visits him every month to get money for the upkeep of their child. The frequent visits could pose a serious problem for your marriage.
I guess your insecurity could be derived from how a past boyfriend might have disappointed you. If that is the case then you must try and get assurance from him.
Instead of worrying unnecessarily which could disturb you, enjoy every moment with him, forget about your previous relationship.
However, if you still feel insecure, then discuss the matter with an elderly priest or person and let him help you to overcome it.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.
Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.
This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I has now become a family affair.
I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.
He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.
Baaba, Apam
Dear Baaba,
Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage.
Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.
Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.
You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.
On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200.
He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.
Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.
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