Relationship
Blended families-tips for easing the transition-Part 4
As divorce is on the increase in numerous places in the world, blended families have become a common type of household. Many families have a lot of difficulties navigating this unique family situation with success.
A major reason is that members of blended families need to make many adjustments in their lives. The transition can be problematic. And trying to force it can breed conflict and resentment.
Last week we looked at four tips that would help ease the transition, this week we continue with final six tips.
13. Expect them to think it is temporary.
Accept the fact that your children may expect you and their other parent to reconcile. They may fantasise that your new relationship with your partner is only temporary. This is, especially true in the beginning. Find a time to sit down with the children and explain that when two people are unable to live together anymore, it doesn’t mean they love their children any less.
14. Expect resentment.
No matter how good a parent you are, you will never be the biological parent of your stepchildren. It is natural for a stepchild to feel some resentment for you, especially when you are setting limits for their behaviour.
15. Show the children love.
Sometimes children need love the most at a time when it is the most difficult to give it to them. While bad behavior should never be rewarded, always praise children when they are behaving well.
16. As a stepparent, be sure to take the time to bond with your new children.
Your stepchild may be resistant, but it’s important for you to lead the way and demonstrate that you are interested and care.
17. Children thrive with schedules and consistency.
The transition will be much smoother if everyone knows what’s expected of them. Have a conversation early on that outlines the expectations and ground rules.
18. Communication is vital.
Ask how you can make the children more comfortable and let them know what you need, too. Honour requests and communicate boundaries as appropriate. Most children just want to know that you’ll still be there for them. Reassure them.
Source – eddinscounseling.com
Navigating social media boundaries as a couple can be a tricky task. With the constant access to our loved ones’ lives that social media provides, it’s important to establish clear boundaries to ensure a healthy and trusting relationship. Here are some tips to help couples manage social media use.
1. Have an Open and Honest Conversation
The first step in setting boundaries on social media is to talk openly and honestly with your partner about how you both feel regarding social media usage. These conversations can be challenging but are essential for maintaining understanding and trust.
2. Be Specific
When discussing boundaries, be specific about the behaviour that bothers you and what you would like to change.
- Instead of saying, “You spend too much time on social media,” try:
“I feel neglected when you are on your phone for extended periods during our conversations. Can we set a limit on phone usage during quality time together?”
3. Be Considerate
Respect and understand your partner’s point of view. The goal is not to control each other, but to create a healthy balance that strengthens the relationship.
4. Agree on Social Media Etiquette
Social media etiquette involves setting clear guidelines for how you and your partner will interact online. This may include:
- Whether you will follow each other on social media.
- What kinds of photos or posts are acceptable.
- How to interact with friends, family, or others online.
Privacy is key in these discussions.
5. Respect Each Other’s Privacy
Respecting privacy is one of the most critical aspects of social media boundaries:
- Do not snoop on your partner’s social media accounts.
- Avoid sharing personal information about them.
- Don’t post pictures or updates they may be uncomfortable with.
6. Don’t Use Social Media as a Measure of Your Relationship
Social media often highlights only the “best moments” of relationships. Avoid comparing your relationship to others online.
- Focus on your unique relationship and its successes.
- Remember that every relationship faces its own challenges and joys.
Conclusion
Setting boundaries on social media is crucial for a healthy, happy relationship. Key factors include:
- Open and honest communication.
- Respect for each other’s privacy.
- Avoiding comparisons using social media as a benchmark.
By prioritising these practices, couples can strengthen trust, intimacy, and emotional connection while navigating the digital world together.
Source: Arkansas Relationship Counselling Centre
Join our WhatsApp Channel now!
https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VbBElzjInlqHhl1aTU27
In the realm of romantic relationships, vulnerability and openness are often misconstrued as signs of weakness. However, research in psychology and relationship counselling suggests that embracing vulnerability can be a powerful catalyst for deepening emotional intimacy and strengthening bonds.
Vulnerability involves sharing our innermost thoughts, feelings, and desires with our partner, making us susceptible to potential hurt or rejection. Yet, it is precisely this openness that allows us to build trust, foster empathy, and create a sense of safety in our relationships.
When couples prioritise vulnerability, they often experience a profound shift in their relationship dynamics. For instance, a couple I counselled who were struggling to connect after a recent move found that sharing their fears and anxieties with each other helped them rebuild their emotional intimacy. By being open about their struggles, they were able to support each other and strengthen their bond.
Benefits of Vulnerability and Openness
- Deeper Understanding: By sharing our thoughts and feelings, we gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and our partner.
- Increased Empathy: When we are open about our struggles, our partner is more likely to respond with compassion and support.
- Resilience: Vulnerability helps us develop coping mechanisms and learn to navigate challenges together.
- Authentic Connection: By being our authentic selves, we create a sense of mutual understanding and connection.
Cultivating Vulnerability
So, how can we cultivate vulnerability in our relationships? Here are some practical tips:
- Start Small: Begin by sharing your thoughts and feelings in low-stakes situations, like discussing a book or movie. Gradually share more personal aspects of yourself as you become comfortable.
- Practice Active Listening: When your partner shares their vulnerabilities, respond with empathy and understanding. This helps create a safe space for open communication.
- Be Present: Focus on the present moment and let go of distractions. This will help you stay engaged and responsive to your partner’s needs.
- Show Appreciation: Express gratitude for your partner’s vulnerability and celebrate their courage in sharing their thoughts and feelings.
In many successful relationships, couples have reported that regular “check-ins” or meaningful conversations help them stay connected and build a stronger bond. By prioritising vulnerability and openness, couples are better able to address life’s challenges together, fostering a deeper sense of connection and intimacy.
Vulnerability and openness are essential components of a healthy, fulfilling relationship. By embracing these qualities, we can build stronger, more resilient bonds with our partners.
As we navigate the complexities of relationships, let us remember that vulnerability is not a weakness, but a strength that can bring us closer to ourselves and our loved ones.
To be continued…
Source: Excerpts from “COURTSHIP MATTERS: Keys to a Fulfilling Lasting Marriage” by Rev. Counselor Prince Offei
(Lecturer, Published Author, Mental Health Professional, and Marriage Counsellor)
Order Book Now:
https://princeoffei22.wixsite.com/author
https://princeoffei22.wixsite.com/website
Counselor Prince & Associates Consult (CPAC Counsellor Training Institute)
Join our WhatsApp Channel now!
https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VbBElzjInlqHhl1aTU27
