Obaa Yaa
Am I a lesbian?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 21 and she is 24 years old. We are both females. This friend of mine once told me she loved me. I considered that to mean the normal saying of telling someone you love the person.
One day, she saw me with a guy and looked surprised. Later, she warned me not to get myself a boyfriend or she will be angry with me.
After that incident, she started showering me with gifts and money. She behaves like a man towards me each time we meet, trying to hug and kiss me.
I have realised that my friend is a lesbian.
One day she touched my sensitive part and I gave in. Since then I have also fallen in love with her.
Obaa, please am I also a lesbian? If yes, how can we advise ourselves to stop?
Claudia,
Koforidua.
Dear Claudia,
It seems you are in the process of being converted to a lesbian. It appears you are not comfortable with the practice even though you seem to enjoy it.
However, you need to know that some pleasant and enjoyable things that come on a silver platter can be costly.
Lesbianism is something our society abhors, therefore getting yourself engaged in it can bring you a lot of troubles.
Religious bodies have openly condemned practitioners, making it difficult for them to be accepted in the society.
I want to advise you to seek help from counsellors and let you understand the dangers lesbianism would expose you to.
It could mean you cannot have your own children unless you decide at a point to quit.
Obaa Yaa
I am sexually attracted to children
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young man residing in Tamale. I am 40 years old and I have got my own business which is going on successfully.
The nature of my job had made me richer and am able to afford anything that I want.
My only problem is that I need a partner but I don’t fall in love with matured women. I am attracted to children.
I have had an encounter with so many women who are ‘marriage materials and type’ but none of them touch my heart.
In my previous relationship, the girl I dated was 15 years. She took me as a big brother but to me she was my lover.
Now that she is 22 and I can marry her, I have lost interest in her.
Obaa Yaa, what do you think is actually wrong with me? Is it normal? How can I have a partner if I continue to feel this way?
Dabo, Tamale.
Dear Dabo,
I don’t even know how to start this conversation. It is not everything that your heart desires that you should go for.
You need to understand that your desire for children sexually is criminal under the laws of this land so it should not be entertained.
I suggest you seek the assistance of psychologist to advise you or else you might end up in jail.
You might be suffering from pedophilia which is a condition of being sexually attracted to children. You need psychiatric help.
I suggest you also speak to your pastors to help you in prayers, in case it might be spiritual.
Obaa Yaa
The banker deceived me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I fell in love with a banker who told me he wasn’t married and therefore, wanted to marry me.
We started going out and spending time together. He went to the extent of going to see my parents for the engagement list.
It was only after I got pregnant when he confessed he was already married and could not afford to marry me as a second wife.
The problem is that for the past five years, this man has refused to provide for the upkeep of the child.
He is not showing any commitments towards the child and making things difficult for me.
I am currently finding it difficult to take care of the child’s feeding and clothing.
My child is very brilliant at school and my fear is that I cannot give him the best of education since I am not working.
Prisca, Dodowa.
Dear Prisca,
Your story is a sad and unfortunate one. He just ‘toyed’ with you and was successful.
It’s about time women check about the men who propose to them.
And in the first place, why were you intimate with him, knowing very well that you were not married?
Report the matter to the Domestic Violence and Victims Support Unit (DOVVSU) of the Ghana Police Service, formerly known as Women and Juvenile Unit (WAJU) immediately.
They would summon him and question him about the upkeep of his child and employ legal means to make him accept responsibility for the child.
