Obaa Yaa
Should l abort or what?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a final-year student in one of the universities in the country but unfortunately I am pregnant. Though we love each other and have planned to abstain from sex to enable us to complete our studies and have a memorable marriage in the future, we could not resist the temptation and the unfortunate has happened.
My greatest challenge is that our parents are poor and will find it difficult to support me through the period of pregnancy and weaning my child.
Secondly, the pregnancy is likely to prevent me from completing my studies on schedule. What should l do to save the situation?
Ama-Cape Coast
Dear Ama,
At your level, you knew the consequences of sex before you indulged in it. However, thank God that in a tertiary institution you cannot be expelled from school, as it is the case at the junior level.
Though poverty has emerged as your greatest challenge, you can still manage the situation and complete your studies.
It will not be easy but you must gather the courage to maintain the pregnancy. This could be the only child in your life and the probability of this man getting married to another person because you have turned barren is great.
You have no idea what this child would be and this could be a test for you, therefore, brace up and take the challenge.
Greetings
Ms Victoria Alando of the 37 Military Hospital. September 26 was your birthday and irrespective of the challenges of this world, God has been gracious and blessed you with another year. May God be glorified in your life and may you receive grace upon grace and may your heart’s desire be granted. Belated happy birthday.
From: Priscilla Juanita Yogtiba, your daughter, family and friends.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I took off my wedding rings but could not find it again. I was washing when I took them off and placed them on a wall close to me. Honestly, after washing I forgot to pick them up until the evening, when my husband asked where my ring were, I quickly dashed out of the room to check where I had placed them, but they were not there. My husband made it clear that I was cheating that was why I could take my rings off and lose them.
I was packing to leave the house when the bags fell and I heard a tinkling sound of metals instead of plastic. I looked around the floor, and my rings were lying there.
Who took the rings and kept them there and why would the person do that to me just to shake the foundation of my marriage?
Oye, Tabora.
Dear Oye,
Your husband’s reaction was abusive, not just angry. Accusing you of cheating was just mean.
Rings don’t prove fidelity, trust does. Your response was fair: taking rings off to wash is normal, and cheating has nothing to do with it.
The fact that the rings ‘mysteriously’ ended up in your bags suggests someone moved them deliberately to cause conflict. A partner who jumps to punishment instead of problem-solving will do it again when the next misunderstanding happens.
If indeed your husband threatened and pushed you out, kindly talk to someone you trust in the family or a counsellor before moving back in. If you choose to stay, your husband needs to apologise and let peace to reign.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My life started falling apart the very day I got married. I started experiencing a series of unfortunate events, which nearly broke me.
In the first year into our marriage, I lost a very lucrative job when my wife was pregnant.
I was scheduled for an interview at the Korle-Bu Teaching Hospital.
Immediately I got down from a taxi, out of nowhere, a motorbike at full speed knocked me down. I broke my leg and was admitted to the hospital for three months.
I lost the opportunity for the breakthrough. Since then, things have become difficult for my family. Is my problem spiritual or what?
Mawuli, Keta.
Dear Mawuli,
Stop linking your hardships to your wedding. Job loss, accidents, and unemployment are painful situations but that doesn’t mean your marriage is cursed.
In life, there are misfortunes and I urge you to continue to pray hard and wait upon the lord.
Focus on what you can control right now: your health, your finances, and your mental health.
Focus on your leg, take any work to build momentum, and consider therapy to break the “everything is a spiritual attack” cycle. Talk honestly with your wife; you two are a team, not the problem.
