Features
Waakye Girl – Part 2
It was another Friday night at the Executive Tavern, where a young group of graduates and businessmen who had started climbing the corporate and business ladder gather to make contacts, drink beer, link up with girls and mostly, show off.
After three weeks on tour in the regions with the Inspection Team of the bank’s Accounts Department, Aperkeh had joined his three friends – Kwabena, Edusei and Charles, had just met as they did every Friday.
‘So folks, how have things been? Any interesting office news, and any new girls?’ ‘On my part, nothing new,’ Charles said. ‘I’m still eyeing that girl at Procurement, but she’s not showing any interest. She gives only short replies to my questions, and hardly smiles back.
I will give her another two weeks, then I will forget her. She’s really sexy but she could also be very boring’.
‘She’s boring because you can’t get her? Why don’t you look at your approach, your style? Maybe she finds you boring so far? Do a little investigation, find out what her interests are. Talk to one of her close friends. You will get one or two useful tips’.
‘My brother, as for me, I don’t have time for CIA work o. If the girl is boring, I will just move on and try my luck elsewhere. There’s another girl in the same department. I will start looking her way. If this one doesn’t improve I will simply move over’.
‘I’m with you, bro’, Kwabena said. ‘Life is too short. At this stage in our lives we should be looking at the market, trying a few potentials and eventually making a selection. No need to waste time on one boring girl’.
‘Hey, Aperkeh’, Edusei started, how is Waakye Girl? What’s the plan?’
‘No change in plan. She’s still there. I will keep her for as long as I find it convenient, then I will drop her. I think I was a little hasty in moving her into my place. She’s certainly good-looking, and very helpful.
My parents kept asking me to bring her in because she’s from our town and all that, even if I was not going to marry her immediately, and her parents did not object when she started spending time with me. But I should not have moved her in.
She knows now that I have no plans of marrying her. In only a matter of time she will find her way out.’
‘But Aperkeh, shouldn’t you be a little careful there? She’s a beautiful girl, and she’s virtually living with you as your wife, cooking for you, keeping the house clean and doing all that a wife does? Would it be so easy pushing her out, especially when you are from the same town and your parents know each other? And what if she gets pregnant?’
‘I have thought about all that. But I’ve made my decision. I won’t marry her. The earlier she sees the light and moves on, the better for her. I won’t waste much sleep on this. Her parents and my parents will not be pleased, but what can they do? Listen, I have already located another curvy, elegant, pretty girl.
I gave her a lift just before I went on inspection. You guys will meet her in a few days. So forget Waakye Girl. Her time has passed’.
‘I think it’s okay if you decide to leave her and move on’, Charles said, ‘but don’t keep things hanging for too long. Some parents can make things difficult if they believe you have used their daughter and dumped her, especially in this case where the girl is not a street girl, as you yourself have said. Leave her and be done with her.
She and her parents will not like it but they will get over it. And don’t forget, a fine girl like that will get another guy chasing her in no time’.
‘Where will she get a handsome graduate with a great future like me? Somebody will certainly grab her and give her four kids in four years, but she won’t get very far. Look, why don’t we change the subject? I’m not really comfortable with this’
It was Monday morning.
David stopped the car and walked to buy waakye for himself and three others at the office. Stella served him and moved towards his car.
‘Good to see you again, Stella. I hope your weekend was okay’. ‘Well … I will call you when we close from here. How was your weekend?’
‘My weekend was fine. I will be expecting your call.’
‘Hi David. Sorry if I keep bothering you with my issues, but I appreciate the sympathy you have shown. The weekend was not great, at all. A girl came to the house to ask for my, er boyfriend, and when I asked her why she wanted to see him she said it was not my business, so I said I would not allow her to see him.
Eventually, he heard us exchanging words, so he came over and went to the entrance to speak to her, and I saw him giving her some money.
I had made up my mind to ask him why a girl should come to the house to ask for him, and also why he gave her money. But to my surprise he issued a stern warning that he’s not married to me, and I have no right to prevent him from seeing anyone. So I asked him what he thought of me, and what role he thought I was playing, living with him, and he replied that if I had any intelligence I would not ask him such a silly question. I have never felt so humiliated in my life. I have just given myself away to a man who has absolutely no respect for me.’
‘Stella, listen to me. You have done absolutely no wrong. Given the attention he was giving you, and the encouragement and even pressure from your parents, any young girl would have made that decision.
He’s from the same town, he’s a graduate, and he said all the right things. Fortunately, there’s more than enough time to change things round.
Don’t engage in any more confrontations with him. As soon as possible, if possible today, go and tell your parents what is happening.
Let them know the situation, and state emphatically that it is clear the guy has no plans for you, and wants you out, so you are moving out. If they insist on your staying, tell them you will go and rent a place to live in.’
‘Thank you David. Thank you very much. I will do that, today. I hope I can continue to call you.’
Of course you can. In fact, we can meet sometimes, even though I won’t advise it until this problem is solved. But I’m sure all will be well very soon.
Attention-Deficit or Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is often mistaken for laziness or indiscipline. In consulting rooms across Accra and in reports from school teachers, the pattern repeats: children who are bright but forgetful, parents who feel helpless, teachers who see incompleteness.
Research is clear-Barkley (2015) and others describe ADHD as a difference in the brain’s regulation of alertness, impulse and working memory, not a lack of effort.
The family’s role begins with structure. Regular sleep, predictable meal and homework times, and a simple visual list (uniform → books → water → corridor) provide the external scaffolding of these children need. Praise what is completed—“You opened the book and wrote the first sentence”-instead of rebuking what is missing.
Schools can help by seating the child front-row and centre, giving short written plus verbal instructions, allowing brief movement breaks, using quiet nonverbal cues and, where possible, grading effort and method as well as neatness. These adjustments reduce conflict and raise submission rates without lowering standards.
Couples and caregivers should share roles: one grounds, one pivots, and both protect rest. Shame-“bad parenting, bad child”-needs replacing with fact: different wiring, needs scaffolding.
Outcomes improve not by promises of perfection but by daily routines, clear limits and warmed connection. One homework slot kept, one instruction chunked, one calm repair after blurting-these small wins shift the family climate and let the child be seen beyond the label.
Resource
• CPAC (award-winning Mental Health and Counselling Facility): 0559850604 / 0551428486
Source: REV. COUNSELLOR PRINCE OFFEI’s insights on special needs support, relationships, and mental health in Ghana. He is a leading mental health professional, lecturer, ADR Expert/Arbitrator, renowned author, and marriage counsellor at COUNSELLOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAINING INSTITUTE) – 0551428486 /0559850604.
WEBSITES:
https://princeoffei22.wixsite.com/author
https://princeoffei22.wixsite.com/website
After two weeks of hectic activity up north, I drove to the Tamale airport, parked the car at the Civil Aviation car park as usual, paid the usual parking fee and boarded the plane for Accra.
Over the last two weeks, I had shuffled between three sites where work was close to completion.
One was a seed warehouse, where farmers would come and pick up good quality maize, sorghum and other planting material.
The other was a health facility for new mothers, where they were given basic training on good nutrition and small scale business.
And the third was a set of big boreholes for three farming communities.
The projects usually ran on schedule, but a good deal of time was spent building rapport with the local people, to ensure that they would be well patronised and maintained.
It was great to be working in a situation where one’s work was well appreciated. But it certainly involved a lot of work, and proactivity. And I made sure that I recorded updates online before going to bed in the evening.
When the plane took off, my mind shifted to issues in Accra, the big city. The young guys at my office had done some good work. They had secured five or six houses on a row in a good part of the city, and were close to securing the last.
When we got this property, unusually, Abena greeted them casually, and appeared to be comfortable in the guy’s company.
I was quite disappointed to hear that, because until the last few weeks, it seemed as if Abena and I were heading in a good direction. Apart from the affection I had for her, I liked her family. I decided to take it easy, and allow things to fall in whatever direction.
Normally I would take a taxi to her house from the airport, and pick her up to my place. This time I went to my sisters’ joint, where they sat by me while I enjoyed a drink and a good meal.
“So Little Brother,” Sister Beesiwa said, “what is it we are hearing about our wife-to-be?”
“When did you conclude that she was your wife-to-be? And what have you heard? I’ve only heard a couple of whispers. Ebo and Nana Kwame called to say that they have seen her in the company of—”
“Well said Little Brother,” Sister Baaba said. “By the way, Nana Kwame called an hour ago to ask if you had arrived because he could not reach you. Someone had told him that Jennifer had boasted to someone that she had connected Abena to a wealthy guy who would take care of her.”
I was beginning to understand. For some time, Abena had been asking me what work I was doing up north, and after I had explained it to her, she kept asking. So I think Jennifer fed her with false stories about me in order to get her to move to the Ampadu guy. Jennifer must have been well compensated for her efforts.
“In that case,” Sister Beesiwa said, “you should be glad that Abena is out of your way. She is easily swayed. Anyone who would make a relationship decision based on a friend’s instigation lacks good sense. I hope the guy is as wealthy as they say?”
“Who gets wealthy running a supermarket chain in Ghana?” Sister Baaba said. “Our supermarkets sell mostly imported products. Look at the foreign exchange rate. And remember that Ghanaians buy second-hand shoes and clothes. Supermarkets are not good business here. Perhaps they are showing off that they are wealthy, but in reality they are not doing so well.”
“Amen to that,” I said. “I’m beginning to understand. For some time, Abena had been asking me what work I was doing up north, and after I had explained it to her, she kept asking. So I think Jennifer fed her with false stories about me in order to get her to move to the Ampadu guy. Jennifer must have been well compensated for her efforts.”
She said that David Forson was only an agricultural extension worker in the north who did not have the resources to take care of a beautiful girl like her. And apart from being wealthy, the guy comes from an influential family, so Abena had done much better leaving a miserable civil servant like you for him.
“Amen to that,” I said. “I’m beginning to understand. For some time, Abena had been asking me what work I was doing up north, and after I had explained it to her, she kept asking. We would be able to sell all five houses to one big corporate customer, and we had already spoken to a property dealer who was trying to find a buyer in order to get a good commission.
That was going to be my biggest break. I had asked the boys to look for a large tract of land on the outskirts of the city where we could develop our own set of buildings, blocks of storey houses and upscale apartments. Things were going according to plan, and I was quietly excited. However, things were not going so well regarding my relationship with Abena.
My buddies Ebo and Nana Kwame had called to say that they met Abena and her friend Jennifer enjoying lunch with a guy, and Ebo believed that Jennifer was ‘promoting’ an affair between Jennifer and the guy. They were of the view that the promotion seemed to be going in the guy’s favour, because only an agricultural extension worker in the north who did not have the resources to take care of a beautiful girl like her.
And apart from being wealthy, the guy comes from an influential family, so Abena had done much better leaving a miserable civil servant like you for him.
“As I’ve already said, I will stop by her place, but I will mind my own business from now. Hey, let’s talk family. How are our parents? And my brothers-in-law? And my nephews and nieces? Why don’t we meet on Sunday? I’m going to drop my bags at my place, and go to see Mama and Dad.”
