Obaa Yaa
Unpleasant day in my life
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Dear ObaaYaa,
We fell in love through strange circumstances and since then the expression of love between us in the first few years has been lovely and attractive to hundreds of our admirers.
The two of us came to the realisation that we were for each other and nothing could separate us.
Though we were mates in the university and completed the same year, she was employed three months before l secureda job and things were moving on well with us.
With time, l discovered to my surprise a change in her character, as conversation between us was not as fluid as it used to be. She retorted to my comments and complained about steps that l took.
I was utterly surprised with the change of events and, therefore, sensed that the future looked bleak for the two of us.
Despite these disturbing challenges, l was shocked to the marrow when one evening she sent me a message that she was no longer interested in the relationship and for that matter we should end it there.
After reading the message l called her to find out whether she was the one who sent the message and she confirmed to me that she did. Since she failed to provide an answer, l suggested that we meet and trash out whatever the problem was but she demanded that l should give her time to think about it.
I did all l could but she would not change her mind. This was indeed an unpleasant day in my life. Since that day, l went through sleepless nights, but it later occurred to me that life must go on despite the challenges.
Since then the idea of getting a partner in life has eluded me.
What shall l do?
Kojo, Tema
Dear Kojo,
I would like to encourage you to be courageous, maintain your youthful exuberance and be optimistic in life.
You are not the first person to experience a failed relationship, having enjoyed the promises and assurances which pointed to a lovely marriage life. Additionally, you will definitely not be the last person to fall into such trouble so do not lose hope.
Be reminded that marriage thrives when genuine love is in place and the two lovers are compatible. Otherwise, whatever you do will not be successful.
Be grateful to God that you have identified your differences early for which reason she requested that you should break up the relationship.
This is the time for you to pick up the pieces and position yourself for your life partner who will love and understand all that you do. Be consoled with the words in scripture which says that we should be thankful to God in all circumstances.
A CEO visited his office and saw a man who was scrolling through his phone while sitting on a sofa.
The CEO asked, “What are you doing?”
The man replied, “Wasting my time until I’ll get paid.”
The CEO was furious, “What is your weekly salary!?”
Man, “$1000”
The CEO counted $2000 and gave it to the man, “Take this money and get out! You don’t work here anymore!”
The man silently took the money and left.
CEO walked up to the reception, “By the way, who was this guy?”
The receptionist said, “Pizza delivery”.
I didn’t understand why my father abandoned me as a child until he appeared recently and told me my mom placed a curse on him.
I was about thirteen or fifteen, my mom took me to the front of a big house and told me that is where I belong.
I knocked the door and the man sacked me from the house to go back to my mother.
Life with my mother was very tough until God came through for me to gain a scholarship.
Years later, I’d returned from abroad when this man walked up to me apologising.
I take care of him and provide him with everything. He needs my attention but I doubt if he will get that from me because he didn’t take care of me.
Jojo, USA.
Dear Jojo,
This is such a heart breaking story. No child deserves to grow up wondering why a parent was absent or feeling abandoned.
If your father’s explanation is true, the responsibility for leaving you still rests with him. A curse, fear, or conflict with your mother may explain his decisions, but it does not excuse abandoning his child.
Parents have a duty to love, protect, and remain present in their children’s lives, regardless of the problems between them.
Now that he has returned, it is reasonable to listen to what he has to say, but you do not have to accept everything without question. Ask him honest questions about why he stayed away for so many years, why he never tried to reach you, and what he hopes to achieve by reconnecting now. His willingness to take responsibility for his choices is more important than the explanation he gives.
At the same time, try not to carry the burden of your parents’ conflict. Whatever happened between them was their issue, not yours. You were an innocent child who deserved the love and presence of both parents.
If you choose to rebuild a relationship with your father, let it happen gradually. Trust is earned through consistent actions, not just words. If you decide not to have a close relationship with him, that is also your right. Forgiveness, if you choose it, should be for your own peace of mind, not because you are obligated to overlook the pain you experienced.
Most importantly, remember that your worth was never determined by your father’s absence. His choices reflect his decisions, not your value as a person.
The past cannot be changed, but how you respond now can help you find healing and peace.
