Features
The funny side of Ghanaian politics

A couple of weeks ago, I went to collect something from my sister at her home because I left it there when I visited the previous day for a family event. When I got there, my niece who is about five years old was in the yard, so I called out to her through the gaps in the metallic gate and asked her to go and call her mother to come and open the main gate for me, to enter with my vehicle.
Her mother came out and she said, “The man you referred to as ‘Papa No’ is your uncle.” Apparently, she went to her mom and told her that, the man who came here yesterday, is at the gate asking you to come and open the gate for him. Now when you mention ‘Papa No’, it becomes a sensitive word and someone who is politically inclined will either laugh or become offended depending on which party the person belongs.
According to news reportage, the term became an issue as a result of banter between some ladies on social media who were apparently fighting over a sugar daddy. Another lady who was a friend to one of the quarrelling ladies, referred to him as ‘Papa No’.
It was further brought into the public arena and became a topical issue when a popular Ghanaian musician called Sidney, came out with a song entitled ‘Papa No’. Since then, ‘Papa No’ has been trending on social media and has generated a lot of buzz all across the country. The funny thing is that no one has categorically mentioned the name of the person being referred to as ‘Papa No’, who it is believed to be a big shot in Ghanaian politics.
A funny incident recently occurred in parliament, to be specific, last week Friday, when parliament was debating a bill for approval or otherwise, concerning the financial vehicle known as the Agyapa Mineral Royalty Bill to deal with royalties from our mineral sector, to raise urgently needed funds for government. During the debate, the MP for Yapei–Kusawgu, John Jinapor, was against the approval of the bill and forcefully gave his opinion in support of his position.
Immediately afterwards, the current Minister for Information who is also the MP for Ofoase- Ayirebi Constituency, Kwadwo Oppong Nkrumah was given the floor. He eloquently enumerated why the bill must be approved. He then ended his submission by saying that “if the man who just spoke who is a good friend of mine, and Mr Speaker in my hometown we say ‘Papa No’ ‘Papa No’ …”, suddenly all hell broke loose.
There was uproar of laughter on the Majority side amid shouts of ‘Papa No’ and indignation on the side of the minority. The Public Accounts Committee (PAC) Chairman got up to implore the Speaker of Parliament to ask the Minister of Information to withdraw that reference of ‘Papa No’ and when the Speaker appeared not to be paying attention to him, the Minority Leader then got up.
He complained to the Speaker to ask Mr Oppong Nkrumah to withdraw that reference of ‘Papa No’. He went on to further state that if Mr Oppong Nkrumah refuses to withdraw, then the Minority would also refuse to recognise him as the Minister for Information and would also call him ‘Maame No’.
The Majority Leader also got up and said that the Minister was just cracking a joke and should not be taken as an insult or an attempt to demean his colleague MP. He then went on to say that if the Minority Leader is insistent, then the Minority Leader must be made to also retract the ‘Maame No’ reference. Then some drama ensued as the Chairman of PAC who was sitting not more than a metre away from the Minority Leader said that the Minority Leader did not say ‘Maame No’ to which the Majority leader replied “You see how it is?” and added, “If you say you did not hear your leader say ‘Maame No’, then it is very strange.” Finally, the Speaker ruled that these happenings were not new in parliament and that all sides should ignore the comments and move on.
During the period leading to the 2016 elections, a term appeared in the political space which was a reference of one of the then presidents to one of the chairmen of the opposition parties. The term ‘Opana’, became a topical issue and the usual political jabs were being thrown back and forth across the radio waves and social media. Ordinary folks started using the term to crack jokes and during phone-in sessions on radio, serial callers had a field day with the word.
Recently, the name ‘Government Official One’ has also become a topical issue. The NDC mounted a spirited defence when the NPP communicators were suggesting that the ‘Government Official One’ was a reference to former President Mahama. In fact, a press conference was organised to debunk the allegation that the ‘Government Official One’ was not former President Mahama as some people sought to suggest. Up till now, the former president has not debunked the allegations that he is the person being referred to as ‘Government Official One’ in the Airbus case.
‘Domestication’ was a term that became a word on the lips of everyone many years ago, due to its use by the late Mr Dan Lartey who was then an independent presidential candidate in 2008 elections. He became known as Mr Domestication and was all over the airwaves. He was quite a character and a jovial one at that which endeared him to the hearts of many Ghanaians until his passing. He was quite happy that people were calling him Mr Domestication and it did not bother him at all. Just like what we experienced at school, the more you react violently to a nickname, the more it encourages colleagues to call you by that name.
‘Papa No’ has become a hot item due to the attempt by people who are supporters of former President Mahama and who seek to defend him by saying that he is not the person the lady referred to as ‘Papa No’. Till they realise that this is not going away until they stop pushing back, the ‘Papa No’ will continue to be the topic for discussion for a very long time. It also has a nice ring to it and so people are prone to creating fun with it.
The funny thing also is that, it is a word that is often used in the Twi language, and so its use has caught on with a lot of people. Now one needs to be careful in the use of ‘Papa No’ otherwise you can easily be classified as an opponent of NDC due to the highly polarised political environment currently existing in the country, and more so as we approach the elections.
Given the sense of humour of Ghanaians, we have not seen or heard the end of such terms and name calling, and the earlier we got used to it the better.
AVERAGE CITIZEN
Features
Farmers, fund and the mafia


The notion some people have about the Sikaman farmer can be amusing. It is the belief of some that immediately a struggling farmer manages to grab a loan, the first thing he does is to invite his abusua (kith and kin) home and abroad.
He organises a mini-festival using palm wine mixed with Guinness as the first course. There and then he announces that he is no longer a poor man; in effect he has ceased to be the close buddy of Mr John Poverty.
The ceremony will be consummated with singing and breakdance, a brief church service, drama and poetry recitals.
At least three bearded goats complete with moustache and four cockerels would be sacrificed in various recipes to celebrate the farmer’s broken alliance with poverty. Some would end up as fufu and light soup, grilled chicken, toasted mutton and smiling goat-head pepper soup. In short, the loan was well taken and well utilised.
The farmer’s prosperity begins right from the stomach. His idea is that if you don’t prosper in the stomach, there is no way you can prosper outside it.
Some farmer are ‘wiser’ though. When they get the loan, they promptly look for new wives. They can no longer continue enjoying one soup everyday like that. Variety is the spice of life! A new wife would bring new zest, new hope and heavenly glary into the farmer’s life. Most importantly the new wife would bring more action into his waist.
So the loan goes indirectly into promoting physical exercise for the human waist instead of the expansion of the farm, purchase of new equipment and improved seeds. Farmers of this nature are jokers, not farmers.
Is it probably because of these whimsical reasons that the banks are reluctant to grant loans to farmers? Obviously with the celebration of mini festivals and the installation of new wives, it is unlikely bank loans can ever be repaid. Of course, farmers who are more concerned about their libido can only be experts in re-scheduling loan payments and not in paying back loans.
Banks are very much concerned about getting their monies back with interest whenever they give out loans. So they demand collateral security as a requirement for the granting of loans. Some farmers actually don’t have anything they can put up as collateral except their hoes, cutlasses and wives. So they struggle through life, not going and not coming.
I do not blame the banks for not granting loans to those who cannot put up collateral. But what about those who are very serious farmers and can put up collateral. Should they also be denied?
Farming is seasonal and a farmer may need a loan only within a certain period to grow crops or breed birds. When the period elapses before the loans are granted, farmers are tempted to misapply the money because it lies idle. In fact, with idle money lying around, the farmer may be tempted to ‘purchase’ a new wife.
It goes without saying that farmers need money but for specific periods when the banks apparently do not take into consideration. Within three months in a year (main cropping season), a crop farmer must plant, nurture, harvest and sell. He applies for a loan and takes nine months or is not even granted. Meanwhile the money lies under his bed waiting to be enjoyed. Not all farmers are angels.
Now, If the government has seen and acknowledged the importance of farmers in national development and has instituted a Farmers’ Day which is a public holiday during which farmers are awarded, then government might as well also do something about funding for our serious farmers, at least the award winning ones to expand and grow since bank loans are not readily available.
Lama of Site 21, Tema, a man of great learning and of vision, has just been telling me that when a farmer gets an award, it means he knows his way about his job, is serious and diligent. According to him, most likely that such a person would also be investment-conscious and judicious in the use of his resources, and not interested in enstooling a new wife.
If government can set up a fund to assist, not with cash but by way of inputs, most of our farmers who have not had any assistance to propel themselves above sea level would be most thankful.
Interview a few award-winning farmers and they would tell you their palaver. The Overall Tema Municipal Farmer Mr Ellis Aferi and his wife Mrs Rosemary Aferi, began their Soka Farms Complex with ten fowls. The pig (a sow), was sent to a farm on a cart to be serviced and brought back breeding.
His piggery is now a real model of inspiration. “We started right from the scratch without any bank loan or financial assistance from any quarter. We placed our trust in labour, hard work and the advice of extension officers. Today we have a large piggery, poultry breeding house, mushroom and snail quarters, fishpond and beehives aside the rabbits we breed. All these without a penny from anywhere,” Mr Aferi told me just last week.
However, he bemoaned the current situation farmers are facing “We have exploited our creativity, our imagination and our muscles. There is a limit to productivity using only human labour and ingenuity. We now want to grow bigger but without funding there is little we can achieve in our bid to grow and develop.”
Mr Aferi like, his colleagues, uses about one ton of wheat bran to prepare feed for his birds, pigs, snails and fishes every week. When Food Complex was in operation, they had their wheat bran without problem. Today, there are mafia connections in the wheat bran trade.
According to all the livestock farmers I’ve spoken to, it is hard to get wheat bran from GAFCO or Irani Brothers directly. They allege that the companies prefer to sell to some wealthy women and top business-men who can buy wheat bran on conditional basis (that is together with flour and other products of the companies), than to farmers.
Then these women and businessmen through their agents resell the bran to the poor farmers at cut-throat prices. I don’t think the system is being fair to farmers. It is indeed a tragedy for the farmers who through their sweat and blood the nation is fed.
“We protest heart and soul,” one farmer yelled at me as if I was responsible for their plight. “How can I feed my birds and pigs satisfactorily if I cannot get wheat bran at the factory price? We disagree that because we are poor, things should be made difficult for us. The rich must not be allowed to exploit us like that.”
The proprietor of Soka Farms, Mr Aferi, for instance has risen from the discomfort of the dust and hardness of the earth to such an enviable height to be an award winner who now holds seminars for farmers, students and officials of organisations on his farm near the Ashiaman-Michel Camp barrier. He must be propped up, even if not with money with inputs on credit basis.
The government must think about setting up a special fund for such individual farmers to grow, while preventing them from cheats and those in the cloak of the mafia.
This article was first published on Saturday, September 21, 1996
Features
Mystery surrounding figure five
There seems to be something mysterious about the figure five or numbers ending in five. A few days ago I realised it was June 3, so I called my brother-in-law, to talk about his narrow escape from the disaster which occurred at circle in 2015.
It is a date that reminds the family each year of the goodness of the Lord every year since the incident. My brother-in-law had been standing and chatting with some friends at one of the shops that got burnt less than an hour before the incident happened.
Therefore for us as a family, we celebrate that day as a day of deliverance of one of us even as we sympathise with those who lost loved ones in that fire disaster. Later on after I finished talking to my brother-in-law and was reflecting on the incident and issues around it, another incident early on in that same year, came to mind.
The incident had to do with an air disaster in Europe and I began wondering if the number five in the figure 2015, had something to do with it.
Reports came through that a Lufthansa flight from Barcelona in Spain, flying to Germany, had disappeared from the radar around the Swiss Alps and that a search was being organised to try and locate it.
The result of the search established that the aircraft had crashed. What is even sad about this incident are the issues that led to its occurrence. Investigations conducted after the crash revealed that, it was deliberately caused.
It was revealed that, the pilot steeped out of the cockpit to go to the washroom. The co-pilot locked the door so no one could enter the cockpit without him opening it.
He then proceeded to set the aircraft on autopilot to crash the plane. When the Pilot realised that there was something wrong with the plane he rushed towards the cockpit, only to realise that it was locked.
He banged on the door to no avail. They tried contacting the co-pilot but he would not answer. Nothing in this world will be more painful than to see death coming and being helpless to prevent it. They could do nothing until the plane crashed.
A former girlfriend of the co-pilot revealed later to the investigators that he once told her that one day, he would do something that the world will forever remember his name. It came out later also, that he was told by his Doctor not to fly a plane again until his medical condition improves.
Apparently he had a mental problem but he kept it to himself and his employer never knew anything about his condition and he sadly killed high school students, about 60 from the same school, returning home from an educational tour in Spain.
This is one thing I have been praying against and I can imagine the grief of the parents of these students who tragically lost their lives.
In 2005, there was Hurricane Katrina which brought in its wake such a huge devastation in the United States. In that same year, an earthquake occurred in Kashmir resulting in over 86,000 people losing their lives, again note the last digit of the figure 2005.
I am therefore inclined to believe that we need to intensify prayer this year, 2025 to avert disaster. History has a way of repeating itself. Until I grew up, especially at the secondary school level, I wondered why we should study history and that apart from it being a reminder of dates on which certain events occurred, there was really no use for it.
I now know better that it is the basis for forecasting future events. Our teachers did not help us by not telling us the importance of history, maybe I would have become the National
By Laud Kissi-Mensah