Obaa Yaa
She seeks my forgiveness
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 27 and my girl friend is 22 years old. We have been friends for 10 months now but staying in different towns.
Recently, she came to me and complained that she had been sacked from the house by her father because she had a confrontation with him.
I advised her to stay with me, but was shocked to discover later that she had a boy friend who lived in the same community with her. When l questioned her, she said the gentleman was a former classmate of her elder sister.
l grew furious and threatened to sack her after which she apologised and asked for forgiveness. What action should l take against her?
Kwame , Accra.
Dear Kwame,
It is not advisable to accept somebody’s daughter to stay with you in the house without the knowledge of her parents. What steps would you take in case she falls into trouble? You would put yourself in a serious trouble.
In view of what had transpired between father and daughter, the lady’s father would not be happy to hear that she is staying with you. You should let her go and apologise to her father.
If she is of good character and you are desirous of marrying her, you can forgive her, follow the right steps towards marriage, monitor her movements and advise her to focus on you alone.
As a man, you must help her to overcome her challenges since she is a young lady.
Greetings
Mrs Mary Poku. God has favoured you with the opportunity to celebrate another birthday. We thank God for this wonderful occasion and pray that He will spread His arms around you and guide you all the days of your life.
From: Mr Joseph Kodzo Poku, your lovely husband, Mr Derrick Jessi Poku, Mrs Geraldine Amoabeng, Joseph Tawiah Poku and Richel Atta Poku, your children.
George Anku Kyekye. June 20 marked a memorable day in your life. As we join you to celebrate this day, we pray that God will answer your prayers and give you peace in your heart. Remember that your maker will always keep you under His protection and constant care. Belated happy birthday.
From: Florence, Eric, Allan, Julie and Francis, your siblings and Albert, Deborah, Allan and Loreen, your children.
Ms Joycelyn Agyapong. You recently celebrated your birthday and l would like to use this opportunity to express my endless love for you. May your dreams be fulfilled with much happiness. A belated birthday to you my sweet heart.
From: Eddie.
MY daughter completed Senior High School this year and she had a very good grade.
With her grade, her father wants her to pursue Computer Science Engineering, but she had an interest in Civil Engineering.
Finally, admission forms are out and my daughter got Civil Engineering.
Her father doesn’t pay for her school fees because she did not choose the course he wanted her to offer.
Due to this, they don’t see eye to eye and it is causing tension at home.
Please, how do I reconcile father and daughter? I am so stressed with what’s going on between the two. Thank you.
Enyonam, Keta.
Dear Enyonam,
BOTH of them have legitimate feelings: the father may be worried about her future and wants to guide her, while your daughter wants to pursue a field she is genuinely interested in.
Do not try to settle the matter when either person is angry. The purpose should not be to decide who is right, but to find a solution that protects their relationship and your daughter’s future.
Ask your daughter to explain why she chose Civil Engineering.
She should explain what attracts her to the course, the subjects involved, the career opportunities and, importantly, why she believes she can succeed in it. If she has researched the universities and career paths, she should present that information to her father.
Talk to the father that financial support should not become a weapon.
It is understandable that a parent wants to have a say in a child’s education, especially when paying the fees. However, withdrawing educational support simply because his daughter chose a different legitimate course can damage their relationship. He can express his disagreement while still supporting her and allowing her to take responsibility for her choice.
Dear Araba,
THERE is this handsome gentleman in my area I am crushing on badly. He gave me a lift to the office a month ago and I mistakenly farted in the car.
When the incident happened in the car, he just stared at me but looked unbothered, which made me a bit comfortable.
Araba, Takoradi.
Dear Araba,
HONESTLY, I don’t see anything wrong with that. You are human, and human beings fart. The fact that he didn’t say anything or make you feel uncomfortable probably means he understood that it was an accidental, normal bodily function.
Ever since that incident happened, he has stopped calling or texting me. He doesn’t even give me a lift any longer.
Please, tell me, is it a crime to fart in your crush’s car?
What is keeping you embarrassed after months is not the fart itself but the meaning you have attached to it. You have replayed the incident so many times that it has become bigger in your mind than it probably ever was in his.
Just confront him that it was a mistake and, for that matter, we should let go of everything and move on.
