Obaa Yaa
She believes l am cheating on her
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Of late,my wife picks up quarrels with me without any provocations and strongly believes that l am cheating on her.
Though l was once caught with a lady and embarrassed, that should not be the guarantee or the reason for the daily accusations and casting aspersions on me.
I close late from work and prefer to be left alone to think about other things in relation with my work but she fails to give me that peaceful atmosphere to operate.
I sometimes feel like staying with my friends at weekends, yet she keeps bothering me that l am cheating on her.
She is not prepared to believe me despite the explanations lhave given her.
What should l do?
Kwame, Swedru
Dear Kwame,
You must get it clear that decisions or actions you take in life will definitely have dire consequences on you and your family.
Per the narrative, you have called for the tune and must be prepared to dance according to it. You have wilfully created the atmosphere of mistrust and you should not blame her actions because she can’t tell when you will falter again.
You have demonstrated to your wife that you cannot be trusted so far as fidelity is concerned.
I believe prior to her actions, there was no occasion on which she had attacked you for cheating on her.
As a husband, you have the obligation to create a congenial atmosphere and have effective period to dialogue with your wife at home.
Though you close late from work, and become very tired and have no time to spend with your wife, you, however, have plans to spend time with your friends.
I think a change of attitude is what you ought to do and demonstrate to your wife that you have changed for the better.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My marriage is falling apart because I spent more than an hour at the market, and I honestly do not know what to do anymore.
Anytime I visit the market, my husband gives me only one hour to return home regardless of wherever I have gotten to.
This has brought disagreement between my husband and I .What started as a disagreement between my husband and I has now become a family affair.
I never imagined that a simple trip to the market would lead to such a painful situation in my marriage.
He has told me to pack from our matrimonial home until further notice.
Baaba, Apam
Dear Baaba,
Do not allow family pressure to determine the future of your marriage.
Your husband’s family may genuinely want peace, but their desire to restore the marriage should not take priority over your emotional well-being.
Marriage reconciliation should not be about getting a woman back to her husband’s house at all costs.
You can respect your husband’s family without allowing them to dictate your decision.
On a more serious note, your husband should acknowledge the harm caused by his actions and apologise sincerely if he wrongfully sent you away. However, an apology alone is not enough to repair a marriage.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 27 years, living in a single room at Lapaz. I have stayed there for three years and I always pay my rent on time.
Last month, my landlord called me and said he had doubled the rent c from GH₵600 to GH₵1,200.
He says everything had increased so I must pay double or leave by the end of this month. I don’t have anywhere to go and I don’t have that amount. When I tried to beg him, he said if I don’t pay, he will lock my room.
Please advise me, what should I do? I am stressed.
Worried tenant.
Dear worried tenant,
I don’t know why your landlord is acting this way. He cannot just lock your room or eject you like that. In Ghana, the Rent Act mandates a landlord to give proper written notice and go through the Rent Control Department. Locking your room or throwing your things out is illegal.
You can explain to him that you cannot afford 100% at once. Propose something you can afford, maybe ask for time to adjust.
Go to the Rent Control office near you (with your old receipt and any message from your landlord). They will invite him and help you both agree on a fair increment. Usually, an increment should be reasonable, not 100% overnight.
While Rent Control is handling it, quietly start looking at other options, just in case he insists on not renewing your rent after your current rent expires.
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