Obaa Yaa
My mother is misbehaving
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 26 and I live in the same house with my mother who is becoming annoying. She doesn’t do anything at home and she is not making things easier for me either. She doesn’t give me room to communicate with her. She wakes up, eats her breakfast and leaves for work.
Lately, she appears to be very forgetful. Many a time, she would leave food on the stove and forget that she has left something there until the food gets burnt. When l complain she insults me.
This behaviour of hers seems to be getting worse. She has refused to take any advice too. I am worried. Is there anything I can do?
Vivian, Nkawkaw.
Dear Vivian,
You did not state your mother’s age but it appears she may be entering into another phase of her life. It may not be her fault. About her becoming forgetful, she may be suffering from dementia or other neurological condition. You can help her seek medical attention.
Talk to her on her calm or happy days and don’t react when she does anything that upsets you. Remain vigilant when she leaves anything on fire so that she doesn’t end up burning down the house.
Again, do your best to help her with some tasks, and get closer to her more as she may eventually open up about her challenges.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We bumped into each other on orientation day as freshers on campus. I liked his smile, his choice of words, and charisma. I didn’t hesitate at all when he asked for my contact. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with a guy like this, I said to myself.
We texted more often, had conversations on phone, and our friendship literally grew very strong. We attended lectures together, studied together, hanged out together; everyone thought we were lovers.
He did everything for me—surprise dates, thoughtful gifts, pays my academic fees, and gives me a listening ear everyone would wish for.
One evening at a friend’s birthday party, standing in the middle of the audience, he proposed and asked me to be his girlfriend. I declined his proposal; this was because I have no feelings for him, and I just want us to be friends.
He is a man with good morals, so gentle, God-fearing, ambitious, a man every lady would wish for, but my heart just wasn’t in it. I wondered if love was supposed to be this complicated: the more he did, the more I felt like a friend, not a lover. He still wants me, but I want us to be just friends. What should I do?
Naa Kwarley, Kaneshie.
Dear Naa Kwarley,
This is a tough situation, and you’re handling it with both kindness and firmness.
Since you’ve already told him you’re not interested in a romantic relationship, it’s crucial to be clear and direct while still being respectful. I’d advise you to reiterate your feelings to him, emphasising that you value him as a person and appreciate what he’s done, but you see him more as a close friend. Make it clear that you hope you can still maintain a strong friendship, but it can’t be anything more.
It’s essential to be prepared for him to need space or time to process, so be patient and understanding.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a regular reader of your highly esteemed paper and I would like to know whether some amount of money is paid to those who write short stories for publication on the children’s page of your Weekly Spectator.
I wrote a short story which was published last month, and my friends who saw it told me that a token will be paid to anyone whose story is published.
A.J., Kwabenya.
Dear A.J.,
We don’t pay for short stories published on our children’s page. That opportunity is to encourage school children to develop the habit of writing. We believe that by publishing their short stories, they’ll be encouraged to write more.
The paper is open to everyone who wants to share ideas or write about a concern.
