Features
Monsieur’s daughter – (Part 1)
From the first day he reported for duty as French tutor, David Essel, a French-German graduate, made a huge impact on life in and around the Aboso Senior High School.
And the school made a life-changing impact on him. At first, the students took the enthusiasm with which he introduced French greetings, rhythms and catch phrases as funny.
But he quickly pointed it out that by taking French seriously, they would only be taking their very lives seriously. Ghana, he stated, was surrounded by French speaking countries whose citizens continuously flocked here to seek employment and business opportunities, yet Ghanaians hardly even knew those countries, mainly because they cannot speak French.
It was time to reverse the trend before they swallowed us up. And by learning at least another foreign language, they would become true, global citizens. Anyone who missed such realities would regret it badly in future. Moreover, he said, French was an enjoyable language, and he would prove it to them.
Within a few months, French had become the most popular language. Even students who were not offering French were taking it seriously. Apart from earning the respect of students and teaching colleagues, Monsieur David had quite a few lady admirers in the big town.
One of them, Gladys Asiama, a home science teacher, decided to beat the competition by making a ‘direct assault’. She wrote him a note asking to meet him to discuss translations of some popular French dishes. And when David obliged by going over to offer his generous assistance, she gently provided some well-prepared dishes.
Before the end of the year, she had completely won him over, to the annoyance of many girls. Gladys was certainly good looking, but later in the day, David wondered to himself how he got so completely run over by her.
They courted for some six months, during which they spent most evenings together, cooking and eating, going over homework a preparations for the following days’ classes. For David, ‘Gee’ was the beautiful, dutiful and practical partner he had always wanted in a life partner.
She was a good planner, who thought well ahead. And on her part, David was a far cry from the romantic but idealistic Simon, with whom she had enjoyed a three-year whirlwind romance, but who had travelled the US for a three-month training course but had stayed for over three years without a letter or telephone call.
Apart from being serious with his work, David was focused on improving himself, and had promised to support every business initiative she made. He was earning some income from writing articles in French, and was preparing to write a novel in French.
Although they wanted to have a modest wedding, their colleagues, students and parents and the folks of Aboso made sure it was a memorable affair. Gee got pregnant with their first child, and even though she was generally in sound health, David went the extra mile to make sure she was comfortable. Around the time of the pregnancy, Gee pleaded with him to allow her to spend weekends with her parents at Kubeasi, and he reluctantly agreed.
But for most of the pregnancy, she had it smooth sailing, and Sarah was born without hitch. There was no shortage of people to help with her care, and Gee resumed work. Their marriage, to all intents and purposes, had gotten off to a good start. One morning, however, one of their female colleagues walked into his class and asked him to find some fifteen minutes to meet her for some very vital information. Sometime before the close of day, he met her at the school park.
“I’m sure you will misjudge my motive for giving you this information, but I want you to know that I am not a liar, and I certainly won’t lie about such an issue.”
“Don’t worry, Adoma. I know you are a lady of principle. I’m sorry our relationship ended rather, er, abruptly. Indeed, I will admit that I wasn’t in control of things. But that’s not why you asked to meet me. Please go ahead.”
“Well, I’m afraid it’s not pleasant. Some months ago, a friend of mine who knew that I had been seeing you, came to tell me that one Simon, a former boyfriend of your wife, was back in town, and had been spending time with her at the Nananom Guest House.
This happened on quite a few occasions. I couldn’t tell you then, because even if it was proven to be true, people would accuse me of breaking up a marriage. But last week, something happened, again. Your wife left school to meet with him, twice.
My friend says that a woman who works at the Guest House called Mansa is prepared to confirm this, because she is disgusted by your wife’s behaviour. That is all. But I will be grateful if you could leave my name out of this, whatever action you decide to take.”
“This is so kind of you, Adoma. You know, one thing I’ve always feared in life is treachery. I experienced it at close hand in my family, and I hoped to avoid it. Don’t worry. I will make some enquiries, and take decisive action. I’m so grateful. If I may ask, can you forgive me for what happened?”
“I never held anything against you. So in that sense you can say we are still friends.”
“Okay. Then let’s meet for a drink one of these days.”
David got home as she was tucking Sarah into bed.
“Welcome sweetheart. You are late.”
“Yes, I had to make a couple of contacts. Is she okay?”
“Very much so. Your food is in the oven.”
“Actually, I wanted us to have a short discussion first. When you have a minute.”
“I’m ready.” She moved to sit right next to him and smiled.
“Last week Tuesday and Wednesday, you went out of school. You didn’t tell me, surprisingly. Where did you go?”
“I’m sorry. I think I went to buy some materials for the cookery classes.”
“Gee, take a moment to think, and answer me. Where did you go?”
“Ah, where is this coming from? I told you that I went to buy materials.”
“Did you buy them at Nananom Guest House?”
“I think I passed there briefly.”
“On both days? To see Simon? For sex? Apparently, this has been going on for some time? So you, a married, nursing mother, is also having sex with another man?”
‘Look, David, you are just sitting there and hurling unsubstantiated allegations against me. You can’t insult me, eh?”
“Unsubstantiated allegations? I can certainly substantiate them. And I must tell you. I will not stay in a marriage, not for one day, with a treacherous wife.”
By Ekow de Heer
Conflict at work is more common than you might think. According to 2022 research by The Myers-Briggs Company, more than a third of the workforce reports dealing with conflict often, very often, or all the time in the workplace. The same report found that managers spend an average of four hours per week dealing with conflict, and nearly 25 per cent of people think their managers handle conflict poorly or very poorly.
Addressing a dispute might feel tense or awkward, but resolving the conflict is typically well worth it in the long run. Whether you’re trying to mediate conflict between colleagues or are directly involved, here are seven steps you can take to manage workplace conflict.
1. Don’t put it off
Facing conflict head-on is hard. However, waiting too long to address it can negatively impact your emotional well-being, focus, and the entire office environment. If you’re feeling angry, letting that emotion fester can also escalate it over time. This can make you less responsive to other points of view and make it harder to resolve the issue.
The sooner you can address the conflict, the better it will be for you, the person you disagree with, and your entire team.
2. Learn all you can about the problem
It’s important to determine the type of conflict you’re dealing with. Begin by considering the cause of the conflict. For example, ask yourself whether someone said something that upset you or if you have emotions of anger and resentment that stemmed from something that happened.
Then try to identify if it’s a task, relationship, value, or team conflict. Once you know what type of conflict it is, you can work to resolve it with specific tactics for that situation.
If you skip this step, you may waste time or escalate the situation further by trying to address issues irrelevant to the real conflict.
3. Actively listen
Listen attentively when people share their side of the story. Active listening is one of the most valuable professional skills you can possess. This type of listening involves not only hearing what the other person is saying but also listening to understand their point of view.
No matter your role in conflict, it’s easy to begin sharing your opinion with little regard for the other people involved. However, it’s important to learn about all sides of a disagreement to make well-informed decisions before drawing conclusions.
To reach a resolution, you must step back and prioritize listening over talking. Ultimately, that will encourage the other person to do the same when it’s your turn to speak. –source: betterup.com
Today, I focus on the Temple Of Praise Ministries International (TOP Church) in Helsinki, as I continue my description of personalities or institutions and their accomplishments as members of the Ghanaian Diaspora in Finland.
The TOP Church in Finland has seen significant strides and accomplishments that must be made known to the public. 
Some history
The Church was established in Finland in September 2016. Since its inception, it has steadily grown both spiritually and numerically, by the grace of God, as disclosed to me by Mr Matthew Anini Twumasi, the Presiding Elder of TOP’s branch in Finland. The TOP Church has other branches across Africa, Europe, and America.
The Church in Finland was founded with a vision to create a welcoming and dynamic community where people could experience God’s love and grace (see, www.topchurchfinland.org). According to Presiding Elder Matthew, the TOP Church operates within a unique environment where Christianity coexists with what is seen as a largely secular society.
Despite this, he submits, there are significant opportunities for outreach, unity, and demonstrating the love of Christ through service and community engagement.
Activities
Church services at the TOP Church are typically held on Sundays for the main worship. In addition, there are mid-week prayer sessions, Saturday prayer services, and a half-night service held on the last Friday of every month. “We also organise quarterly programs”, Elder Matthew added.
His impression of the Church so far has been positive. “It is a vibrant and welcoming community where members are committed to worship, fellowship, and supporting one another in faith”, he stated.
In sum, Elder Matthew said the Church continues to grow by God’s grace. “We remain hopeful and committed to spreading the Gospel, strengthening the faith of our members, and making a positive impact in society”, he continued.
Achievements
The TOP Church has a number of achievements and achievements. Some of the strengths include strong community bonds, cultural diversity, and deep commitment to spiritual growth.
I also remember that during the COVID-19 period, I heard that the TOP Church was one such bodies that hugely supported its members and others to cope with the situation.
According to Elder Matthew, the challenges facing the church include “adapting to cultural differences, engaging the younger generation, expanding outreach in a secular society, and securing a permanent place of worship”.
Role in the Ghanaian community in Finland
The TOP Church plays a prominent role as a religious group that serves Ghanaian migrants and others in the Finnish society.
Thus, the TOP Church is a religious body for Ghanaian migrants in Finland and other nationalities who want to worship with them for diversity and better intercultural and multicultural understanding.
The Church also has mechanisms in place to support its members who are bereaved as a way to commiserate with them in times of death and funerals.
The Ghanaian community has played a vital role in the growth of the Church. Their strong sense of fellowship, dedication to worship, and active participation have helped build a solid foundation and attract others to the ministry, according to Elder Matthew.
Integration
By its activities, the TOP Church is helping to ensure integration of its members well into the Finish society.
This is important since social interaction and citizens’ well-being are an important part of the integration process.
The role of migrant associations and groups such as TOP Church acting as bridge-builders for the integration and inclusion of migrants through participation in the decision making process and by acting as a representative voice is highly appreciated in Finland. Thank you!
GHANA MATTERS column appears fortnightly. Written in simple, layman’s terms, it concentrates on matters about Ghana and beyond. It focuses on everyday life issues relating to the social, cultural, economic, religious, political, health, sports, youth, gender, etc. It strives to remind us all that Ghana comes first. The column also takes a candid look at the meanings and repercussions of our actions, especially those things we take for granted or even ignore. There are key Ghanaian values we should uphold rather than disregard with impunity. We should not overlook the obvious. We need to search for the hidden or deeply embedded values and try to project them.
With Dr Perpetual Crentsil
