Obaa Yaa
I’m stuck in between
I am 28 years old and dating a 38-year-old woman. We started off well. The connection was great but as time went on, I realised she was a perfectionist and wanted to be right all the time.
She talks to old friends and sometimes flirts with them but becomes suspicious of any call I receive. She acts like she loves me but I once read a message on her phone where she described me as a ‘small boy” to another person.
My composure towards her has not been the same since I saw the message. Now I am in love with a younger lady who is my age mate but she is not as caring, loving and sexually active as the older woman I am seeing now. It feels like I am stuck in between. What should I do?
Worried Nana Yaw.
Dear Nana Yaw,
You shot yourself in the foot by reading messages on your sugar mummy’s mobile phone. It appears, from your narrative that you are in the relationship because of the sexual gratification you get from your “older woman”.
Examine your current relationship to determine if you really love your sugar mummy. If your responses are negative, you need to re-adjust and define the kind of relationship you want for yourself. Bear in mind that a healthy relationship goes beyond sexual gratification.
Walk out if you are not happy with your sugar mummy and pay more attention to your younger girlfriend and see where the road would lead both of you to.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I wrote sometime back in 2024 to discuss an ordeal I went through. I contracted a sexually transmitted disease (STD) when I was doing my national service. Initially, I thought it was a normal sickness, so I visited a nearby hospital for treatment. I still feel itching and pains in my manhood.
I began to worry about the whole situation. I wrote to you and you directed me to see a specialist. The doctor did what he could, but the disease still persists. I have also gone through a lab test which shows that there is nothing wrong with me. A few doctors and pharmacists I contacted claim it could be psychological.
There is a sore at the tip of my male organ, and I am disturbed. Not only do I find it difficult to urinate, but it gives me continual sharp waste pain. Currently, I’m not only going through serious physical pains but psychological, because I cannot concentrate on my job for five minutes. I have also been praying and fasting. Can this be spiritual?
Mawuli, Keta
Dear Mawuli,
I hope you are doing well. I will advise you to take your medication regularly. There is still hope for your situation. See a urologist at the Korle-Bu Teaching Hospital for assistance.
I cannot say if your condition is spiritual or not. However, do not stop praying to God. Your miracle may just be on the way.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I’m a lady in my late 30s who wants to give love a second chance, despite all the pain and scars love has caused me.
Tony was just a new staff my company recruited to work in my department. We became friends, and our friendship became stronger when we realised we were both of the same tribe. We fell madly in love, and dating each other was the best option. I got pregnant and less than a month later, we did our traditional wedding and later signed in court.
I found out that my husband, Tony, had a wife and a child in the United Kingdom (UK) when I was eight months pregnant and five months married. What should I do?
Patricia, North Kaneshie
My dear Patricia,
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It takes a lot of courage to open up about your pain. It sounds like you’ve been through a really tough experience with Tony.
First, let’s acknowledge your strength and resilience. You’ve been through a lot, and you’re still standing. That says a lot about your character.
It sounds like Tony presented himself as a good man, and you believed him. You connected well and he seemed to have good family values, but it turns out he was hiding a big secret.
My advice to you is to take time to process your emotions. It’s okay to feel angry, hurt, and confused, but allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship and the future you thought you had.
You might want to consider seeking support from loved ones, a therapist, or a support group. Talking through your feelings can really help.
In terms of the next steps, you may consider getting legal advice to understand your rights and options. As a pregnant woman, you have certain rights, and it’s essential to prioritise your well-being and the baby’s well-being.
