Obaa Yaa
Childlessness likely to push us apart
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We are in our sixth year of marriage with lots of love for each other.
We have many friends who love us and are always around to lend a hand of support in whatever we do.
Unfortunately, we do not have children, a situation which has the possibility of pushing us apart due to the frequent comments and attacks from people.
Although my husband has not personally complained to me, a close relative of his told me his parents keep asking for a grandchild.
He seemed not to be concerned for now, however, the frequent disturbances could degenerate into serious problem for me.
Checks at the hospital have not produced any good results. What should l do? Should we adopt or go to a fertility hospital for an invitro- fertilisation? I am worried.
Vida, Accra.
Dear Vida,
The problem should not be laid on your head alone but it rather calls for concerted efforts from the two of you to solve it once and for all.
The decision to write to this column explains how worried you are and you ought to know that you are not the only family being confronted with such a problem.
Some couples had stayed either eight, 10 or more years before conceiving. However, the problem was solved through regular check-ups with the assistance of a gynaecologist specialist.
Obaa Yaa
Let’s protect the girl child
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a mother whose children are all girls. I am having sleepless nights over cases of little girls being defiled lately.
I wished to give birth to boys because my parents gave birth to only girls.
I am getting worried with the way the girl child is taken advantage of by unscrupulous men and it appears these men are going unpunished.
What can I do to protect my children? We must begin to see actions geared at saving the girl child.
Araba,
Takoradi.
Dear Araba,
YOU must begin to have very frank talk with your little girls. Tell them about sex, and tell them it is wrong for little girls to engage in it.
Tell them that it is wrong for anyone, most especially strangers, to touch or fondle their private parts and should not hesitate to report such cases.
With the children who are too young to speak properly (below three years), make it a point to bath them yourself either in the morning or evening and observe their private parts to make sure are well.
Do not leave them in the company of boys or men for long periods without checking on them.
Obaa Yaa
My mum wants me to end my relationship
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 26 year old driver, and she is 24 and an apprentice seamstress. We have known each other for three years.
I was having launch when my girl entered with another man but she didn’t see me.
When I asked who the man was, she said he was from her hometown and was invited by him for a drink. I just slapped her and she left.
Obaa, I had seen this man with my girlfriend another night and when I questioned them, he tried to fight.
I slapped him and he went to the police station to report that someone had assaulted him and stolen his necklace, watch and an amount of money.
The matter got to my mother and I was asked to pay Gh¢8,000 for assault.
My mother says, I should break up with the girl but I love her and can’t do that. What should I do?
Efe, Mallam.
*****
Dear Isaac,
Your girlfriend needs to be talked to instead of slaps. Let her understand that you felt threatened by the man who is not a mutual friend to the two of you.
You must explain to her that even though this man is from her town, she should have introduced him to you and also make an effort not to be with him at places and times that arouse suspicion.
This would be the first part of saving your relationship. The second part is that you need to control your temper as violence would always land you in trouble.
Finally you need to reassure your mother that you would never act the way you did again.
