Obaa Yaa
Can l suggest to my cousin to marry this lady?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I know a pretty lady, who is respectful, has unblemished character who l have admired all these years.
I have an elderly cousin, though of age and has been working more than six years without a wife, all appeals to him to marry have not been heeded.
Lately, he was summoned by the elders of the family on the same issue but he did not take the suggestion serious.
Aware that this pretty lady is without a husband, l would like to give his contact number to you through your editor so that you can have a chat with him and tell him of my suggestion.
I would be glad if you could try to find out from him what is preventing him from getting married.
I do not care if you mention my name to him that l have given out his telephone number so that you can call him. Of importance is the need to tell him about this lady who is dear to my heart.
You can suggest to him that he should heed the many calls from his family members and marry.
Kwame, Tema.
Dear Kwame,
You have demonstrated the love for your cousin and your desire that he should marry a lady who by your estimation is good and must, therefore, be married to your cousin.
Though you have taken the right step, it is sometimes difficult to make suggestions in this regard, because it is rather better for the individual to make his own choice. Should there be any problem in the marriage, you are the first person to be blamed for making a wrong choice.
On the contrary, if there is any fault with the person’s own selection, he will have himself to blame.
You can send his contact to me as you have suggested and l will try my best in this regard.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
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Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
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Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
