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A horrifying encounter with a terrible woman
Wherever there is darkness, evil thrives. Load-shedding had brought darkness to Sikaman and the rate of sin has gone up dramatically. When I caught a young man practically working up a young girl in the dark near my home around midnight, I knew the effects of load shedding were becoming far-reaching.
Kwame Alomele tall and halt naked suddenly burst onto the scene guess the lovers became frightened by my height and apparent size and before I could say Jack the horrified fornicators had taken off like Olympic athletes. Perhaps they thought I was the latest ghost in town.
In fact I couldn’t sleep that night because of the heat: it was when I came out almost naked to get some breeze that I saw the human dogs moaning excitedly.
At first I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. And I am not used to watching such live performances. The problem is that I am a born-again Christian. Any-how before I could come to terms with the goings-on of the orgiastic ceremony, there was a sudden ruffle and then the quick shuffling of feet almost simultaneously didn’t know girls could also run that fast.
I am pretty sure they were damn scared and would never try it again around my territory. It is dangerous territory. You wouldn’t know when Kwame Alomele will appear in white and cause horror and panic.
Apart from the unbearable heat one has to face on load-shedding nights, you are also denied cold drinks. These days some of us have to pick a taxi to non-load-shedding areas to chill. It was last week Saturday when I made one such trip, and what an experience it was.
I was chilling contentedly and enjoying the breeze when a young woman of about 28 walked slowly and came to my table. I looked up at her and waited for her to talk. She said nothing.
“Are you looking for me?” I asked.
“I thought you were my brother who said I should meet him here. He looks exactly like you.”
“I see, look around, maybe he is hanging around somewhere in that corner,” I told her.
She looked around with disinterest and said her brother was nowhere around. I expected her to re-trace her steps and walk off. She didn’t.
Instead she said, “Well, once I haven’t seen my brother, I might as well sit here with you”. She sat down and smiled at me. I looked at her, examining her features carefully to make sure I was not dealing with any common ghost. She asked for a drink and I asked her to pick it up herself at the counter.
She stood up and while walking to the counter, she dangled her weighty buttocks. I was impressed.
She came back with a bottle of Guinness. “As for me, I don’t like drinking,” she declared. A little Guinness or malt is all I take. But I must confess that I want to spend the night with you that’s why I am here. I like your structure-thick tall. Are you a prince?
I was amused I wasn’t even a nephew of an Odikro much more becoming a prince. I took my drink quietly and she talked on. Knowing she was a prostitute, I feigned interest in her just to keep up the conversation.
How much do you charge for full night? I asked.
Charge? I don’t charge, I am not a prostitute. When you sleep with me, whatever you give me, I take.”
“I am not a greedy person believe me. Well I said, “I am really not in the mood today. You can meet here tomorrow same time and we’ll go and have a nice time. Do you know any hotels around? “Plenty! But I want to sleep with you tonight,” am really in love with you.”
Not tonight, No way! I am sleeping with you tonight by force,” she said emphatically and aggressively.
I became alarmed. What did she mean? Was she going force me into bed? Not Kwame Alomele, no matter how honey I become.
“Well, you know something, “I proposed, “I know you are only after the money. So you get this ¢2,000 and leave me alone.”
“Who told you I want money?” she asked me. I want money alright but I also want to have sex tonight. I feel for you. I know a hotel around the corner. Please, hurry with your drink and let’s go.”
“I am not interested,” I said. “I don’t know you from anywhere: how can I sleep with you? You may even be a ghost.” She laughed aloud.
“A ghost? She asked soon after. “If you see a ghost you can’t recognise it? Well I am not a ghost. I am a darling. If you say you are not in the mood for sex, I can do something to help you. I’ll buy two raw eggs, mix it with condensed milk for you to take. You’ll never stop coming. You can go four rounds.”
I was quite fascinated with her brand of sex therapy. She might have studied a very crude form of biochemistry and wanted to apply on Kwame Alomele. Wallahi
I finished my drink, got up to leave and she got up quickly and followed me. Close markings! I told her I’ll pick a taxi home and she responded by saying we were not going home but to a hotel. “You’ll like the style I’ll display for you.
You’ll forget about your wife for good; if you like let’s bet.”
I realised I was in trouble. I started watching out for a taxi that would have only one vacant space at the back so that I could leave without her. She realised my intention and cautioned. “I’ll drag you out if you want to leave me behind; if you like try.
I now had to use my wits to get away from the evil woman who was as tall as myself. I couldn’t underrate her strength. In fact she had muscles and I guess I was in for it. Moreover I didn’t want her to create a scene.
Craftily I told her I had changed my mind and that I was prepared to go to the hotel with her after all. I’d look for an empty taxi so that we could start the romance in the back seat to precede the actual showdown, I told her.
She was glad. She drew closer to me. Oh my dear. She crooned. “I knew you were going to agree. You only wanted to bluff me small, isn’t it?”
Of course. I must bluff a bit. After all, I am a prince. Am I not? She laughed.
I espied an empty taxi coming but deliberately allowed to pass. She called my attention: That’s an empty one; I stopped it quickly.
“Hold on. I told her “They charge exorbitantly if you appear too interested in them. Wait here and let me go bargain with the driver.”
“You rather wait, “she replied. “I’ll bargain with him. These drivers they are swine”
“Please, you are a woman. Bargaining is a man’s job. Just stand by.”
“No problem.”
I walked to the cab and told the driver quietly that as soon as I jump into the front seat, he should speed away.
“Aren’t you going with the lady?” he asked with concern.
I say speed away. Don’t ask me questions. I am paying for the job”
In a sudden flash, the woman saw me open the front door and jump into the seat. She dashed in my direction with lightning speed. At that very moment, the driver revved the engine, released the clutch and fired the accelerator.
The car jerked forward, landed in a pot-hole, came out of it and veered from the road towards a large gutter. The driver skilfully controlled the car and brought it back on track and powered the accelerator furiously.
I turned to look back and saw to my horror that this woman was chasing the car. Her speed was unbelievable. This woman is not human, I said to myself.
Indeed it was a real- load-shedding experience for me.
This article was first publish on Saturday, February 28, 1998
THE typical itinerant salesman in Sikaman is a herbalist. He is normally a slim macho with the capacity to perambulate the expanse of area covering the triangle of Accra-Tema-Ashiaman. In short, he can walk a total of 60 miles a day, marketing a product that cures every disease, including poverty.
The door-to-door herbal pharmacist advertises his product by word of mouth. He has nothing to do with the Food and Drugs Board (FDB). After all, his concoctions do not feature on FM stations.
Those herbalists who cannot walk to propagate the herbal gospel, liaise with drivers of mass transportation and their mates. They are, therefore, given the chance to sell their products on Benz buses that ply the routes.
Normally, the herbalist starts his sales message with a prayer and Bible study. He asks the passengers to bow down their heads in supplication to God the father, the son, the Holy Spirit.
When a herbalist asks the passengers to close their eyes and bow their heads, Moslems on board naturally feel offended. They feel that the herbalist has no right to assume that every passenger is a Christian. They think such an assumption is an affront to Islam.
So a Moslem on board will raise the hand for a point of order. He’ll remind the herbalist that it would be in his own interest to mind his language.
“Be careful the way you address people in a public place. Not every person here is a Christian,” he’d state assertively.
Of course, the herbalist will promptly ignore him, but would all the same “watch” his tongue. Who knows whether or not the Moslem brother is inspired by Quoranic zeal to defend the tenets of Islam to the hilt?
When he starts saying, “Wallahi!” and “Inshallah!” it could be the beginning of proclaiming Islam as supreme, a point which must be driven home with talibanic precision.
So the herbalist must tread carefully lest he steps on fire.
The herbalist could even add a measure of mirth to it all, by announcing that Christians on board today have very interesting company on the journey, but that should not detract from the business of the day.
The Moslem brother will weigh the words carefully and offer a wry smile.
He must be careful the occasion does not degenerate into the use of semantics and proverbial oration to deride his conviction that public utterances must be mindful of religious sensibilities. He has made his point very clear and expects that it is taken in good faith in the interest of a peaceful journey.
The herbalist will now open the New Testament and preach salvation, stating clearly that salvation can come only through Jesus Christ and NOBODY else.
The Moslem brother will now start twitching his moustache. The visible and almost revolutionary reflexes of his upper lip can be an indication that sentiments have begun superseding reason, and the outcome could well be tragic now shift uneasily in his seat.
The time has come for him to also express his right to the religion of his fore-bears. He’ll put his hand into his pocket and rise to his feet. The time has indeed come!
This article was first published on Saturday, September 9, 2006
When the cause of a particular problem like sickness, disease, sudden illness, a social issue etc. are not known, it stands to reason that resolving it becomes a huge challenge.
Citizens would understand the government when public announcements are made to the effect that government is trying to find a solution to the issue, even though it is taking a while for it to be resolved because citizens are rational beings.
On the other hand, if the solution to a particular issue is known to everybody but the government for whatever reason, is dragging its feet in resolving it, citizens become frustrated and begin to lose trust in their leaders.
One such issue is the heavy traffic along a section of the Kasoa – Odokor road. A short stretch of bad road between the traffic light at the Weija Government Hospital and the entrance to the entrance of the overhead that leads to the N1, is the cause of the problem but nothing is being done about it, day after day, week after week, month after month. Thus is clearly unacceptable.
Another issue that requires urgent attention is the lack of pavements along a lot of streets in parts of the various Municipal Assemblies. Exercise is a prerequisite for long life and healthy living and for those of us who it has become a way of life, this issue of people putting up structures right to the edge of the drains beside the roads, are making life difficult for us.
We are compelled to walk along the roads, putting our lives at serious risk. Pedestrians should never be compelled to compete with vehicles on our streets and roads. Roads and streets are made for vehicles and pavements are made for pedestrians. That is the norm. Any attempt to normalise a situation where pedestrians are mingling with vehicles is insanity.
It is the road regulations that makes it so and therefore district or municipal assemblies are to take responsibility and ensure that spaces for pavements are not encroached upon. Citizens have rights that must be protected by their leaders and making pavements available to pedestrians, is one of them.
When we hear of teachers having sex with students, it appears it is something recent. It is not a new phenomenon. It has been there since Adam. Perhaps this issue is getting much attention due to the proliferation of social media. It was an open secret in times past when Teachers were in relationships with female students and some married them immediately after completion of school.
Some teachers were also known to be having unholy interactions with female pupils but due to the times that these acts occurred, human rights issues and the awareness around it, allowed such unscrupulous teachers to get away with their crimes.
Now we are in a different era and so a Headmaster is now in hot waters. He is alleged to have raped about 19 female students and as usual, some officials tried to cover it up and are also in hot waters and their actions or inactions in the matter are under investigation.
Why the man has been allowed to roam freely without being arrested is simply mind boggling. It appears that the law applies differently, depending on who you are. This issue came to public attention sometime in August this year, yet the police had not arrested or invited this man for question regarding the rape allegation.
It has come out that he is a Constituency Secretary of the ruling party and the question in the public domain is that, is it because he is a political figure that is why he is still walking around without questioning? I believe in the rule of law so let us hold our breadth and let the proper thing be done.
The police must however be seen to be active in this matter. God bless.
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