Obaa Yaa
Should l consider this man or quit the relationship
Dear ObaaYaa,
My first relationship fell on rocks when l discovered after three years to my surprise that my boyfriend was married with two children and the lady was staying with his parents in the village while he came to Accra in search of greener pastures.
Though l was surprised to hear the news, the surprise look in his face which left him speechless for some minutes was enough for me to believe that the information l received could not be the figment of imagination of someone trying to be mischievous.
Initially, my boyfriend attempted to whisper some words but quickly realised that he had hit the rocks as the words could not flow and there was nothing he could do under the circumstance to redeem his already damaged image.
By intuition he rose from his seat which was opposite mine, went on his knees to plead forgiveness. I did not allow him to waste his precious energy as l assisted him back on his feet and attempted leading him to his seat but he could not move an inch.
I demanded that our meeting that evening should end for us to continue the conversation the following day, God willing. But l could not sleep throughout the night because of the hurt in my heart and in the morning it was not better either.
Linda, Accra.
Dear Linda,
You ought to thank God for what has happened and the fact that you have discovered this embarrassing news early before you could commit yourself further in this relationship.
So long as this lady and her children are staying with the in-laws means she is still married to the husband.
How would you feel imagine you were married to this man before this secret was revealed to you? Your man has erred for not letting out the parcel in his baggage and going forward to propose to you. He should have known that a secret of this nature will definitely come to light.
Having known the facts, there is no need to waste a second of your precious time in this relationship. Despite the fact that this man has shown some remorse you need not sympathise with him. Work hard at getting yours to avoid unnecessary marital problems.
I am in my final year in the university. My elder sister has been very supportive after the death of our parents.
My sister has a boyfriend who visits often. Anytime he comes around, she wonders why I don’t entertain him and why I suddenly find an excuse to leave the room. She takes it as me being cold, even jealous, and it angers her more than I can even imagine.
She has no idea about what is going on behind her back. He has asked me out on several occasions and looks at me in a lustful manner.
But my problem is that I never told my sister the real reason I avoid her boyfriend. I have kept my distance, not out of hate for her or for him, but because I carry a secret that would break her heart.
Princess, Tema.
Dear Princess,
Why are you keeping this away from your sister? As long as you continue to live under the same roof with your sister, tell her about her boyfriend’s behaviour.
Have you by any chance confided in any relative? I’ll advise you to open up to someone, at least to take the weight off your shoulder.
Act fast before the situation exacerbates.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a young lady of 23 years who lives in a compound house around Kasoa in the Central Region. I live with my auntie.
We are not always at home because she spends most of the time at the market due to her business, and I am mostly on campus.
One sunny afternoon, I overheard some tenants talking about another who takes her bath in a basin and throws the water away. We have two big bathrooms, but just because she doesn’t want to scrub, she has refused to bathe there.
Although she is usually not around due to her work as a nurse, it doesn’t warrant her to do as she pleases. We have spoken to the landlord about it, but she seems unconcerned. What should I do?
Beatrice, Accra
Dear Beatrice,
I am surprised that your landlord seems unperturbed.
Have you considered having a conversation with the tenant to find out why she ignores the chores? She does not seem bothered about the kind of perception the other tenants have about her.
Why would a young lady who is a nurse and an advocate for healthy living be this lazy and unconcerned about her surroundings?
No excuse should be tolerated just because she’s a nurse and mostly not around.
