Obaa Yaa
Husband impregnates house-help, wife adopts child
Dear ObaaYaa,
There is a common saying that life is how you make it, and that tolerance and sobriety are qualities which will propel one to surmount difficulties in life.
I thought it wise to write to this column to sound a word of caution or to advise young ladies who married or up-and-coming ladies are contemplating to marry.
We got married and with time had to arrange for a house help because there was the need for an additional hand to assist in taking care of the children.
In no time, our zealous house help attracted the attention and love of everyone in the house and this has given me the assurance that she will possibly spend many years with us.
Having spent two years in the family, one morning, l discovered in her signs of pregnancy. From that time till evening, I took time to observe her critically and eventually confirmed that she was really pregnant.
Afraid of the implications involved with pregnancy and the reactions of her parents, l enquired from her who was responsible for the pregnancy.
I was shocked to the marrow when she mentioned my husband’s name as the one responsible for her pregnancy.
I hurried to the bedroom to verify from my husband what the house help had told me, but he denied that he had nothing to do with her pregnancy and that the lady must be joking.
Though l was enraged in general and the answer he had provided, the obvious question l asked him was “Why should this lady mention my husband’s name and no other man either in the house or in the vicinity?”
However, judging from my husband’s demeanour, l had the conviction that he impregnated our house help.
I took pains to provide our house help with the necessary assistance and the items she needed throughout her period of pregnancy until she was delivered of her baby.
It is quite surprising to note that his child resembles my two children.
Thereafter, l decided to take care of the child, compensated her and asked her to leave the house for good since her continued stay could probably result in another problem.
So this is my piece of advice to the young ones.
Akos, Kumasi.
Dear Akos,
This column would like to praise you for the display of wisdom by which you were able to calm a seemingly volatile situation in your family.
Your marriage would have disintegrated and the children disorganised if you had left your matrimonial home.
More importantly, sharing this wonderful example for others to emulate gladdens my heart that people in dilemma will learn useful lessons from this. It takes women of substance and good character to overcome such problems in their marriages. The world will continue to sing the praises of your calibre.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 35year –old-lady married to a banker. I am a housewife. I am fair in complexion. I got my left hand tattooed sometime last year. I have never had my peace with my husband because he strongly abhors.
In my attempt to get it erased, I have caused a big scar on my hand which has worsened the situation. Sometime ago, your esteemed paper carried a story about how permanent tattoo can be cleared and a location.
May I know whether it is possible to get the scar and tattoo erased, and how much it would cost.
Worried housewife, Prampram.
Dear housewife,
Since I have no idea how wide and deep the scar and tattoo are, it would be difficult for me to have a meaningful discussion with the specialists at the unit.
I suggest that the next time you visit Accra, you pay a visit to any skincare unit and ask what help they can offer.
But until then, do not apply any self-medication. You may also ask your doctor to advise you as if there is any way out for a surgery. All the best.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Ever since we got married, two years ago, my husband seldom wears his wedding ring except on occasion such as church service, funerals, outdooring and other social gatherings.
For the rest of the week, he goes to work without it. The excuse he gives is that whether he wears the ring to work or not, he is by law married to me.
But I beg to differ. I suspect there is more to it than what he told me. I need your advice on this.
Eno, Ashiaman.
Dear Eno,
Some men don’t like wearing rings; others enjoy it. It is just like how some women like wearing jewellery or large earing while others would rather do away with them.
The fact, however, is that a man can misbehave even when he wears it or not because there are ladies who wouldn’t mind with the ring on.
When he gets back home, he would wear it again. What difference does it make if he doesn’t wear it all?
