Relationship
Tips on how to prepare your child for the return to school
It is the New Year! We have all eagerly waited for Christmas and now that it is over, it is time to get back into our daily routine.
This can be rather difficult, especially for children who may have become used to spending time with family, staying up a bit later than their usual bedtime, watching lots of movies and enjoying delicious Christmas treats and exciting new presents.
Having enjoyed some festive ‘freedom’ it is now time to get back to school routines and teachers’ expectations.
Getting back to work/school can cause anxiety to parents as well. Here are six tips to help your family adjust back to the daily routine:
Gradually introduce an early bedtime routine
The kids may have enjoyed a later bedtime during the festive period. By gradually introducing an earlier bedtime the transition between the holidays and the return to school will be easier.
Encourage your kids to go to bed early a few days before their return to school. This will help them get used to early mornings on school days.
Remind them of their usual term-time bedtime routine, such as getting their clothes ready for the next day, or no screen time at least an hour before bed. Do this gradually over the first week back.
2. Talk to your child
Kids find it easier to adjust to a new routine if they know what to expect. Explain to your child that now that Christmas is over and they have enjoyed some lovely experiences together, it is time to get back to school and other daily activities.
Remind them of the daily routine, such as school drop off and pick up, after school clubs, homework and everything else that happens during term-time.
3. Let your child share their feelings without judgment
Ask your child how they feel about going back to school. Listen to what they say in a non-judgmental way and avoid criticism.
Show them empathy and use positive affirmations such as ‘I know it’s hard to get back to school after the holidays’, ‘We are here for you if you find it difficult’ or ‘It is okay to feel this way, you will get through this’.
4. Draw pictures or use social stories
Many children find it difficult to express their feelings. You can ask your child to draw a picture of how they feel about going back to school. This is a great tool to deal with anxiety.
Look at their picture and try to find the message your child has tried to express. If you cannot figure it out, ask your child to talk about the picture and explain it to you. This could be a good starting point for a conversation about your child’s feelings and anxieties.
Alternatively, you could write a social story for your child. Known to be highly beneficial for children with learning difficulties including autism, social stories are effective methods to provide guidance and directions for responding to various types of social situations. You should ideally personalise it so that your child is the main character and your child’s specific school and teachers are mentioned.
5. Use positive holiday experiences
Sit with your child and look back at your holiday experiences together. Look at pictures or special objects that remind them of the holidays and choose one they could share with their friends or teachers at school. Remind your child that although the holidays are over, you can still enjoy family time or trips together on weekends. Try to plan ahead for weekend activities or days out and put these in the diary, this will give your child something to look forward to.
6. Get organised
Do not leave things for the last minute before going back to school! The school run and morning routine is already hectic. Get all uniforms, lunch boxes, book bags ready the night before – and be consistent with this approach.
Ensure school kits are ready for the first day back at school. Check with your child if there is anything else they need to bring back, such as library books they brought home before the holidays.
Parenting teens can be challenging. But it can also be a joy. The key is to know how to care for yourself, first and foremost. Before you have children, you might think that parenting will come naturally. And, to some degree, it does. But there are days (and sometimes months and years) when all parents could use some extra support.
Last week we looked at some four simple yet powerful approaches for parenting teens that build strong relationships for the long-run. Here are the remaining two:
4: Keep communication going
Because we are often busy and distracted, we do not always take the time to really focus on our kids when they’re trying to tell us something. Take advantage of the time you have together. Having dinner together as a family, using car time to talk, or chatting before bed are good ways to stay in daily touch with your teen. Prioritise quality time as well as quantity: Consider having breakfast out on the weekend as a special catch-up time to chat about the week. Or schedule monthly “family meetings” to discuss how things have been going and any conflicts that have arisen.
5. Be an empathetic listener
Listening with empathy and caring is one of the most important tips on parenting a teenager. Researchers have shown that people’s brain patterns synchronise when they listen closely to one another and watch each other’s expressions. As a result, the connection between them becomes stronger. Not feeling truly heard can lead to isolation and lack of self-esteem which are the root causes of anxiety, depression, and substance abuse. Therefore, take listening seriously. It’s not just a way of coping with teenagers; it has an enormous impact on their well-being.
The price of ‘I do’: Why money honesty is the real marriage insurance –Part 2
She did not find out he was cheating. She found out he was drowning.
It was two weeks after their beautiful wedding. The jollof was still in the fridge. A loan officer called her number-not his-and politely asked, “Madam, please tell your husband to pay his overdue loan. We have been calling him.”
That was how she discovered her new husband had entered their marriage with a hidden debt of over GH¢ 40,000. No cheating. No other woman. Just a financial secret.
And that is how many Ghanaian marriages begin to die. Not with a shout, but with a secret alert on a phone.
We prepare for the wedding. We do not prepare for the wallet.
What is money honesty?
Let me define it simply. Money honesty is not that you both earn the same. It is that you both know the same. It is the ability to sit down and say without fear:
“This is how much I earn.”
“This is how much I owe.”
“This is how I was raised to see money.”
“This is what scares me about money.”
Financial transparency is not about control. It is about clarity. You cannot build trust on top of secrets.
Many couples tell me, “Counsellor, we love each other, love will handle money.” I always answer, “Love is the car, but money honesty is the fuel. Love without honesty cannot move.”
How To Buy Your Marriage Insurance Today – My 5-Step Protocol
If you are engaged, newly married, or even 20 years in marriage, you can still fix this. At Counsellor Prince & Associates Consult—CPAC, this is what I give couples:
Step 1: The 90-Minute Money Naked Session.
No phones, no blame. Each partner writes down on paper: Monthly income, monthly debts, monthly family obligations, savings, and your biggest money fear. Then you exchange papers. Read it. Don’t react for 24 hours. Just absorb.
Step 2: Create OUR Money, YOUR Money, My Money.
You need three pots. OUR money for rent, food, school fees, utilities, properties, and the like— joint contribution. YOUR money and MY money—a small agreed allowance no one questions. This stops the feeling of being controlled.
Step 3: The No-Secret Debt Rule.
Agree from today: No new loan, no new hire purchase, no new family financial commitment above GHS 500 without telling each other first. Not permission, but information.
Step 4: Talk About Your Money Personality.
Are you a Spender or a Saver? Are you Risky or Safe? Most Ghanaian marriages are a Spender married to a Saver. Neither is wrong. But if you don’t understand your partner’s personality, you will call his saving “stinginess” and her spending “wastefulness.”
Step 5: Do a Monthly 30-Minute Money Date
Not an argument date. Light, with tea. “How did we do this month? What worried you? What should we plan for next month?” Couples who do this divorce far less.
My Final Word
Before you say “I Do” at the altar, have pre-marital counselling and also have the money talk on the sofa.
Ask your partner:
“If I lost my job today, how long can we survive?”
“What debt are you bringing into this marriage?”
“How much do you send to your family monthly and will that continue?”
If he or she gets angry that you asked, don’t get married yet. A person who is angry about accountability will be abusive about money.
Marriage insurance is not bought at Star Assurance or Enterprise. It is bought in honest conversations when no one is watching.
The wedding costs one day. The marriage costs a lifetime. Don’t enter a lifetime contract and covenant with hidden costs.
You can still insure your marriage today.
Source:
Counselor Prince Offei, CPAC’s founder, is a leading Mental Health Professional, Marriage Counsellor, Author, ADR Expert/Arbitrator, and Spectator Newspaper Columnist. He writes on relationships, marriage, parenting, special needs support, and their connection to mental health. For therapy, counselling, or enquiries, contact Counselor Prince & Associates Consult (CPAC) in Accra on 0559850604 / 0551428486.
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