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BEESIWA – Part 4

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After managing to get just a little sleep, Beesiwa woke up early, and without saying anything to her mother, headed for Yaw Awotwe’s house, not to see Yaw, but in the hope that his driver would be kind enough to say some­thing meaningful to take her out of her confusion. Fortunately they met at the entrance to the Estate, and she greeted him.

He nodded. ‘Uncle Paa Willie, may I respectfully ask you some­thing? I’m in a tight situation. Please help me.’‘Go ahead’.‘You see, Uncle, Yaw has been more than extremely good to me. How­ever, I have been in love with him for some time, and privately hop­ing that something would happen between us. But my mom warned me emphatically that Yaw was way above my class, and there were better girls waiting to catch him.

I kept up the hope for some time, then I gave up, took the advice he had been giving me, and started my own business. As you know he has been very helpful always. Unfortu­nately the frustration of losing him always weighed on me, and then Jeff showed interest, and made a big proposal, and even promised to buy me an estate house.

I discussed it with my mother, and she said I should accept Jeff’s proposal, and I did. I thought every­thing was going to go well, but at yesterday’s dinner, Jeff made the announcement of our impending marriage, and the response was shockingly negative. A few people applauded, and Yaw and Ebo Men­sah rose to congratulate us, but the general reaction was bad.

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So I want to find out whether there’s something I don’t know, so that I back out before I get badly hurt’.‘Beesiwa, if I didn’t know you I would have given you a diplomatic answer. But since I know you to be a graduate with a lot of good sense, let me tell you, straight up, that you and your mother have shown the worst form of judgement any­one can make.

Jeff comes to propose to you, and promises to buy you a house, and you drop all your senses and fol­low him? What work does Jeff do? Where is his office? Who does he employ? Have you met his parents or relatives? Beesiwa, you should be really ashamed of yourself. And please tell your mother that I have lost all respect for her. Let me not waste your time.

You and your mother, go and ask Jeff to show you his office, and tell you what he does for a living. Yaw was prepared to do anything for you. Anything. I said anything. And you turn your back on him, and fol­low this thief with the big mouth?’ Beesiwa opened her mouth wide.

‘Uncle Paa Willie, he told me that Yaw was in serious debt, and he had tried to help him in many ways. He said he would support me to be­come one of the biggest caterers in town, because he had very power­ful contacts. Uncle Paa Willie, how come Yaw did not show any sign of affection for me? I would have never taken such a foolish decision if I had the slightest idea he wanted me’.

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‘He takes his time with every­thing. He encouraged you to devel­op your talents, gave you money to start business, and brought in a girl to help at the house so that you would be free to make money. Why do you think he was doing that? He heard about you and Jeff a couple of weeks ago, and he said he felt very sorry for you, but hoped you at least knew what you were going into’.

So I’ve given you more answers that the questions you raised. I need to be going’.Devastated and weeping uncontrollably, Beesiwa started walking to the roadside to pick up a taxi. Then on an impulse she stopped, turned and followed Paa Willie to Yaw Awotwe’s house. Yaw saw her just before he opened the front door.

‘Beesiwa, I thought I have an­swered all your questions. What is the problem now?’‘I, I, I just want to say one word to Yaw. I won’t take more than one minute of his time’.‘ButBeesiwa, I have told you what you need to do. Why don’t you allow Yaw to go to work?’

You have already made your deci­sion. I don’t see how he comes in at all’. ‘You are here, Paa Willie’, Yaw said from the hall. ‘Is there anyone with you?’‘Beesiwa is here. She says she wants to have a word with you?’‘Really?’ he said as he walked to the front door, and saw Beesiwa weeping. ‘Is anything wrong?’

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‘Yaw, I want to beg you. Forgive me for everything I’ve done against you. I have always had deep feel­ings for you, and kept hoping that you would show some interest in me. But I realized that it was not going to happen, so I gave up.

Then Jeff started showing inter­est, and saying all kinds of things about you, and offering to marry me. I now realize I made a fool­ish decision. I was reacting to the disappointment of losing you, and I thought that because he was close to you he was also a decent man.

He said some really bad things about you, and because we knew him as a close friend of yours we believed him, and my mother and I decided that I should accept his proposal’.‘Beesiwa, I have a dif­ficulty. Yesternight, in fact, only a few hours ago, Jeff was proudly introducing you as his wife, and announcing that you two would be getting married in two weeks time.

Now here you are, telling me that you have changed your mind. What do you want me to do?’‘I’m apologizing for the things I believed about you. After spending so much time with you I should have not accepted any of the things he said. I am really sorry.

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The reaction of the people to his announcement clearly showed that there was something wrong, and when I went home I realized I had acted very hastily. And I came to see Uncle Paa Willie, and he told me a few things. I feel really terri­ble’. ‘Well, Beesiwa. You avoided a big bullet, so let’s thank God for that. If you had taken just a little time to get to know Jeff, you would have known the kind of person he is.

But now you know, so you can get on with your life. You have a business to run. I don’t blame you, but I certainly blame your mother. I don’t think I have the words to describe her’.‘Yaw, I want to ask a very big favour?’‘I’m listening’.‘I want to stop running the business, and come back to work with you’.

‘You know that doesn’t make sense at all. You have clearly demonstrated the capacity to excel in this business, and you are making good money. You want to stop all that and come back as my house help? That’s not right at all’.‘I would do anything to be around you. Please give me just one chance’.Yaw couldn’t hold back the emotions he had been keeping about Beesiwa.

She had made a very ridiculous, careless mistake by accepting Jeff’s lies and going so far with him. For­tunately she stopped just in time. He decided, from that moment, to take her as his lady.‘Okay. Stay here. Spend the day. I have to rush to keep some appointments. I will call’.That was how their relation­ship started. After three months preparation, Beesiwa and Yaw were married. As for Jeff, he got lost somewhere in the bush

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By Ekow de Heer

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MPs, churches, bad dressing 

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GHANA’S Parliament is a peaceful one. The arguments on the floor of the House can be fierce, but the House doesn’t catch fire. Ghana’s democracy has passed the acid-test of constitutional pluralism, and her legislature is a model of democratic beauty others are learning from.

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Sometimes it is edifying following proceedings in Parliament and you are likely to catch the voice of Honourable Alban Bagbin in full flight. He doesn’t talk much. His English vocabulary does the talking.

Last week, I heard another MP talking on bad dressing, and I must congratulate him on his brilliant exhibition of vocabulary, delivered in Westminster tradition.

Such explosive delivery titillates the floor of the House and brings joy to members and Mr Speaker.

In the parliament of some countries, there is no need for such niceties. The floor of the House is regarded as a battle ground. Others, including lady members, see it as a boxing ring, where the spoken word is often jettisoned and supplanted with punches and upper-cuts.

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PART-TIME

So the average parliamentarian trains part-time as a boxer, in case boxing skills will be needed in the House to iron out knotty points.

The ladies’ pedicure and manicure are carefully designed to fulfil a dual purpose. One is to showcase trendiness and the other is to scratch the faces of opponents in the House whether they are ladies or gentlemen. 

Sometimes, the Speaker has to keep shouting and banging for well over 15 minutes as a recalcitrant MP dashes across and grabs the tie of another MP, thus precipitating a free-for-all brawl. Some MPs return home with a half nose, a missing left ear and a double forehead.

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None of the offending parties is sanctioned because brawling in parliament is seen as a democratic process, since some MPs are so stubborn that only a sidekick to the ribs can mellow them. Meanwhile, a free-for-all is good exercise for the MPs, some of whom have grown too fat due to over-feeding.

Fortunately, the parliament of Sikaman has a civil democratic culture and debates get fierce but punches are not unleashed. For comic relief however, MPs do some break dancing once in a while.

When ROPAB was passed into law, some MPs caused a stir by bursting into song and dance. Mr. Speaker was be wildered, but obviously pleased that his announcement of the passage of the bill had brought joy to the House.

Others were not happy, though. The bill and the debates had caused them enough distress. As for the passage, it was like cutting their throats. They groaned in their hearts. No punches, no karate. That is democracy in its maturing stage. It is tempered with reason and civility. One day, it will be their turn to laugh and dance.

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Now, the MP who spoke on bad dressing did a good job by all standards and added value to his delivery by going highfalutin. He wanted a law to be enacted against bad dressing, because it was not good for society.

What constitutes bad dressing? That is a very difficult question. Judging what is good or bad as far as dressing is concerned will obviously depend on the setting or context.

For example, going virtually naked on a holiday beach is considered good dressing. But when a man and his wife storm a church room in their birth-time suits (naked) the pastor and his deacons will surely take cover. It means a sartorial revolution has precipitated and only the Holy Spirit can hold tempers at bay.

STYLISH

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In the streets of Sikaman, a lady with a very short skirt is admired by some as trendy and stylish. Others would think she is indecent and a bad influence. But the question that arises ultimately is this: Don’t people have the right to wear what they want to wear, so long as the unseemly parts of their bodies are not laid bare?

Certainly, nobody will go totally naked in the streets, unless the person is either in-sane or is a Black Stars supporter painted in the national colours. Even then, he’d be in what is called ‘pioto,’ with his ‘instrument’ well-positioned. That is called proper dressing.

So in the streets, this kind of dressing will be considered good or bad depending on the setting and the extent of exposure of the private parts (breasts, thighs, lower back, buttocks, etc).

Personally, I feel the churches should be very scrupulous about the dressing of those who go in to worship. The ushers should be tasked with ushering away badly-dressed worshippers. Incidentally, they are the worshippers who like the front pews, and the pastor is so distracted he can’t preach any meaningful sermon.

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However, a law on dressing is something I won’t advocate, for the simple reason that, first, there is no clear definition of what is bad dressing and second, society must be left to evolve its own dress culture so that fashion and creativity in fashion design will not be stifle Any law to regulate dressing will kill such creativity.

This article was first published on Saturday July, 2006

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The body under siege: how long-term stress wears you down                                                          

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​Most people think stress is just in your head. When you feel overwhelmed, overworked, or emotionally drained, you might think you just need a good night’s sleep or a quick mental break.

​However, science and biology show us something entirely different. Chronic, long-term stress is not just an emotion—it is a full-body physical condition. When you live in a constant state of survival mode, pushing past your limits without real rest, your body pays a very heavy physical price.

​Here is a clear, step-by-step look at how ongoing stress physically breaks down the human body, explained simply.

Step 1: The endless flood of stress chemicals

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​What happens normally: When you face a sudden emergency, your body releases stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. They give you a quick burst of energy, speed up your heart, and help you react fast. This is a great survival tool for short bursts.

How stress breaks you down: If you never truly relax, your body never turns off that alarm. Your bloodstream stays flooded with cortisol and adrenaline day after day. Over time, having these chemicals constantly sloshing around acts like a slow poison. It damages your blood vessels, raises your blood pressure, messes with your metabolism, and even wears down your DNA, making you age faster.

Step 2: The silent internal fire (Chronic Inflammation)

What happens normally: When your brain senses danger or stress, it assumes you might get hurt, so it tells your immune system to cause inflammation (swelling and heat) to fight off germs and heal injuries.

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How stress breaks you down: When stress lasts for months or years, your immune system gets confused and leaves that “fire” burning permanently. Instead of healing an injury, this silent internal inflammation starts attacking your healthy cells, joints, and organs. Over time, it paves the way for serious health issues, heart trouble, and total body fatigue.

Step 3: Turning your muscles into armor (Fascial Hardening)

What happens normally: Your body is wrapped in a web of strong connective tissue called fascia that holds your muscles, bones, and organs together. When you face pressure or trauma, that tissue automatically tightens up to protect you like a suit of armor.

How stress breaks you down: If you stay tense for years, that tissue never softens back up. It freezes in place, creating tight, painful physical knots (often called emotional lesions). Blood and oxygen can’t flow easily through those locked-up areas, leaving you stiff, aching, and physically unable to truly let go of tension.

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Step 4: Burning out your body’s engine (Nervous System Overdrive)

What happens normally: Your nervous system has two main gears:

​The Gas Pedal (fight-or-flight mode for dealing with emergencies).

​The Brake Pedal (rest-and-digest mode for healing and repairing your body).

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How stress breaks you down: Chronic stress forces your foot down hard on the gas pedal 24/7. Your heart beats faster than it should, your digestion shuts down, and your body is denied the deep rest it needs to repair itself. Eventually, your heart and nervous system run completely out of fuel from sheer exhaustion.

Reclaiming your health and sovereignty

​Chronic stress wears you down slowly by keeping your body chemically toxic, inflamed, and locked-up in physical armour, and running on empty.

​By understanding that stress is a physical breakdown rather than just a bad mood, you can stop glorifying endless endurance. It allows you to recognise when your body is screaming for a reset, helping you shift away from burnout and back toward true physical calm, balance, and sovereignty.

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