Features
The epidemic of failing marriages
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Observing the typical Sikaman family from afar, one can really be amused. You won’t fall to see a family member behaving exactly like a Vice-President and another doubling like a Trades Union Congress (TUC) man.
There is also every chance for you to meet an opposition flag bearer and if you’re lucky, you’d meet the President himself, His Excellency Sir Kwame Korkorti, commander-in-chief of the family forces, head of state of the Republic of Korkorti and Sons.
There are various family types with some having the wife as the President for reasons too obvious to mention. They are the breadwinners, and on top of that, they wield the power of the laddle; meaning that the portofolio of the kitchen is under their armpit.
In such a situation, the husband ceases to be a power broker. At best he is a linguist. He doesn’t make the rules, he interprets them. Such a family is a stable one because the woman is a better manager of family resources for the fact that she doesn’t spend on alcohol. She may take ‘quarter’ once in a while, but that is only to trigger off a dull appetite against fufu and groundnut soup.
The sad thing about the Sikaman family is that many of them do not last these days. It is also a fact akin to a worrisome global trend. In the United States, three out of every five marriages end on the rocks. In Russia getting married today and getting divorced the next dawn is a common phenomenon.
Press reports on the Russian situation denote a sad palaver of a super-power society. Russian women are blamed for most of the divorces. According to observers, they are unfaithful to their husbands, a factor that has skyrocketed the incidence of the divorce comedy.
Some, however, blame capitalism on the bad turn of events. With a liberal political and economic atmosphere, everyone is said to be liberated, adventurous wives inclusive. So their husbands must bear with the situation or quit. No compromise!
The Russian situation isn’t an isolated one, though. The whole palaver is that divorce is becoming a global epidemic, a disease no vaccine is able to prevent. I was sad when Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie Presley got divorced.
The lady claimed Mike could not do “things” to her. “He didn’t know I ever existed”, she bemoaned the last days of a tragedy-hit marriage. If that is true, then I’m sorry for her. She should have taken someone like Kokotako. It would have been a different story altogether, because the guy regularly drinks the dregs of palmwine. No lady comes and goes back without a dream in her heart.
Tyson and Lady Diana
Talk about the marriage of Mike Tyson to the beautiful Robin Givens and you’ll realise how it all started fairy-tale-like and ended in a bedroom that and often been transformed into a boxing ring – a mini Madison Square Garden.
When Tyson took Givens and her mother to Russia, I guess the cold entered into Mike’s head and he chased wife and mother around a hotel swearing to kill them.
The old lady did not know she was a good sprinter until the occasion presented itself. And she ran as if she had mad-cow disease. The die was certainly cast. In a television appearance with Mike, Givens told the interviewer that her husband suffered psychiatric problems and beat her. Mike could not bear it any longer. They divorced.
The marriage between Prince Charles and Lady Diana and its tragic coda is one that has brought doubts whether the monarchy is worth perpetuating or dismantling. My own opinion is that the monarchy is no longer worth a dime. Not with all these sexual tragicomedies inundating the centre of the royal family by a relentless osmosis.
Anyway, before the marriage, an astrologer announced it would not last. The prince, a Scorpio and the princess a Cancer, both of the water group were supposed to experience a very boring marriage. With a supposedly incompatible birth numbers and whatever, the astrologer declared the marriage was disaster-bound.
It is not, however, clear whether it is a prophecy come true or the marriage could have been saved if both had wanted to preserve the honour of the monarchy. And with the prince and princess having been very liberal with desecrating the temple of God in adulterous escapades, the monarchy has lost the moral legitimacy of its existence. Moreso when other members of the royal family like Fergie have been too morally wayward for the sanctity of and reverence for the throne.
In Sikaman, the cause of rock-bound marriage include money palaver, infidelity, sexual incompatibility, boredom and common snoring. Well, some wives complain that when their husband snore, the foundation of the building shakes. So they experience mini earthquakes at night and cannot sleep. So they must go to their parents and complain.
The palaver is that in some cases the women out-snore the men, but the men rarely complain. It is normally the women who complain to their parents as a first step to quitting the marriage.
“I am terrified”, a wife will tell her parents. “I can’t sleep even if I take valium.
When he takes akpeteshie before supper, it is worse. It is like his nose has been plugged to high-voltage electricity. I can’t stand it any longer. One day the building will collapse on us”.
“But didn’t you know the man was a dangerous snorer before you decided to stay with him?” her father would ask.
“At first it was not so serious. Now it has become like a criminal offence since he is depriving me of my sleep. He has to be put before the High Court”.
Problems associated with marriage can be minimised with counselling before and after marriage.
Very good marriage counsellors teach you how to become sexually compatible, how to resolve family crisis, how to bring excitement into a dull marriage and how to tone down a vibrating nose.
This is what the churches do these days. They have trained marriage counsellors that take prospective couples through the theory and practice of marriage. Perhaps if Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie had been counselled, it would have been a different matter today.
And Lady Diana would still have been in the arms of the Prince of Wales.
This article was first published on Saturday, November 2, 1996
“A woman who abandons her baby in a dustbin at Kasoa Lorry Station is not always a wicked woman. Sometimes, she is a wounded woman whose mind has broken, whose family has rejected her, and whose society has left her with only one terrible option: disappear or be disgraced.”
That is the hard truth Ghana must hear.
In the last 10 days alone, our nation has been confronted with the same painful headline, twice.
Case 1 – Kasoa Main Lorry Station, Central Region: A newborn baby girl was found abandoned inside a dustbin at the public toilet of the Kasoa Main Station. A woman who went to use the facility discovered the infant and raised an alarm. Commercial drivers and bystanders quickly retrieved the baby and rushed her to the Kasoa Polyclinic for emergency medical care.
Case 2 – Asante Bekwai, Ashanti Region: On Thursday morning, August 20, 2026, a two-week-old neonate was reportedly abandoned by an unknown nursing mother at Bekwai in the Ashanti Region. Residents who came across the child raised the alarm. The baby was admitted to the Bekwai Government Hospital as police commenced investigations.
Let me be clear from the start: Newborn abandonment is wrong. It is dangerous. It is criminal. And it can kill. This article does not excuse it. But if we only arrest and shame, we will never stop it. We must treat the root, not just punish the fruit.
What exactly is newborn abandonment? – The two definitions
The Legal Definition: Under Ghana’s Criminal Offences Act, 1960 (Act 29), Section 96, and the Children’s Act, 1998 (Act 560), abandonment of a child under 12 years is a criminal offence. It is classified as exposure and abandonment, punishable as a misdemeanor or felony. The law sees the mother as a perpetrator.
The Psychological definition: In clinical textbooks, newborn abandonment is defined as the intentional, permanent relinquishment of all parental rights, care, and responsibilities over an infant within the first 28 days of life without making formal, legal arrangements for care.
To understand this crisis properly, we must not confuse it with child abandonment. Newborn abandonment happens within 0-28 days of life, often driven by acute panic, denial of pregnancy, or postpartum psychosis where the attachment bond never formed. Child abandonment, on the other hand, involves toddlers to teenagers where a bond existed but collapsed over time due to chronic poverty, family breakdown, or parental burnout. One is an acute crisis of the first month; the other is a chronic breakdown over years. Both are harmful, but they need different interventions.
Psychologically, newborn abandonment is the ultimate rupture of the primary attachment bond. Think of a 19-year-old university student who secretly gives birth alone in her hostel room, wraps the crying baby in a polythene bag, and drops it at a refuse dump at midnight. That is not just a crime scene; it is a scene of extreme panic and psychological dissociation.
Why would a mother carry a baby for 9 months and then abandon it?
This is the question every Ghanaian asks. If you wanted to abandon it, why not abort? The answer is deeply psychological:
1. The psychodynamics of denial of pregnancy: This is a profound defense mechanism, not a lie. The mother’s subconscious mind completely rejects the reality of the pregnancy. She does not gain weight normally, feels no kicks, does not seek antenatal care, and genuinely convinces herself she is not pregnant until sudden, shocking labour pains take her by surprise in a toilet or bedroom.
2. Fantasy of a dissolving problem: This is called cognitive avoidance. She believes “my boyfriend will come back,” “my mother will forgive me,” or “something miraculous will happen before birth.” So she waits, paralyzed, until the baby is here.
3. Barriers to safe abortion: Deep religious guilt, moral anxiety, fear of dying from a back-alley abortion, lack of money for a safe procedure, and family laws force her to carry to term even when she feels incapable.
4. The shock of reality and acute panic: Upon delivery, the physical presence and crying of the newborn shatters all denial. Confronted with immediate exposure, shame, and reality, her brain enters a trauma response — “fight, flight, or freeze.” For many, it becomes “flight” — physically escape the threat of exposure to survive socially. That is why babies are left in places where others will find them -lorry stations, churches, hospitals.
Source:
Counselor Prince Offei, CPAC’s founder, is a leading Mental Health Professional, Marriage Counsellor, Author, ADR Expert/Arbitrator, and Spectator Newspaper Columnist. He writes on relationships, marriage, parenting, special needs support, and their connection to mental health. For therapy, counselling, or enquiries, contact Counselor Prince & Associates Consult (CPAC) in Accra on 0559850604 / 0551428486.
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Features
Environmental stewardship is an act of worship: The Islamic response to climate change, environmental degradation (Part 4)
The environmental consequences of illegal mining have reached alarming levels in Ghana. Several major rivers, including the Pra, Ankobra, Offin, Birim and Tano, have experienced significant pollution from illegal mining activities, increasing the cost and complexity of water treatment while threatening the availability of potable water for millions of citizens (Water Resources Commission, 2024; Ghana Water Limited, 2024). These developments underscore the urgent need for stronger environmental governance and collective action.
Islam equally emphasises accountability in governance. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) taught that every leader is responsible for those under his or her authority (Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith 7138; Sahih Muslim, Hadith 1829). This principle extends to public officials entrusted with environmental regulation, traditional authorities responsible for communal lands, mining companies, local assemblies, and community leaders. Environmental protection cannot succeed
where accountability is absent.
At the same time, addressing galamsey requires more than law enforcement. Sustainable solutions must tackle the underlying socio-economic realities that drive individuals into illegal mining. Many young people are motivated by unemployment, poverty, and limited economic opportunities. Islamic principles of social justice therefore call for the creation of alternative livelihoods through sustainable agriculture, vocational training, responsible small-scale mining under strict environmental standards, entrepreneurship, and skills development. Environmental protection and economic empowerment should not be viewed as competing priorities but as complementary goals that promote human dignity and national development.
Faith communities also have an indispensable role to play. Mosques, churches, schools, traditional councils, and civil society organisations possess significant influence in shaping public attitudes and behaviours. Imams, in particular, should consistently remind congregations that wealth acquired through actions that destroy communities and Allah’s creation cannot be regarded as a blessing. Religious education should cultivate environmental ethics alongside spiritual devotion, reinforcing the understanding that protecting rivers, forests, and farmlands is an expression of gratitude to Allah and a fulfilment of the trust of Khalifah.
Ultimately, the struggle against galamsey is more than a campaign to protect natural resources; it is a struggle to uphold justice, preserve human dignity, and honour the trust that Allah has placed upon humanity. Lasting solutions will require strong governance, responsible citizenship, sustainable economic opportunities, and renewed moral leadership. Only when these elements
work together can Ghana safeguard its natural heritage for present and future generations.
Water conservation, waste management and sustainable development: Practical expressions of Islamic stewardship
Religious education should cultivate environmental ethics alongside spiritual devotion, reinforcing the understanding that protecting rivers, forests, and farmlands is an expression of gratitude to Allah and a fulfilment of the trust of Khalifah.
Ultimately, the struggle against galamsey is more than a campaign to protect natural resources; it is a struggle to uphold justice, preserve human dignity, and honour the trust that Allah has placed upon humanity. Lasting solutions will require strong governance, responsible citizenship, sustainable economic opportunities, and renewed moral leadership. Only when these elements
work together can Ghana safeguard its natural heritage for present and future generations.
Islam is not merely a religion that condemns environmental destruction; it also provides practical guidance for preserving and sustaining the natural world. Through its teachings on moderation, cleanliness, conservation, and responsible consumption, Islam cultivates an environmental ethic that remains remarkably relevant to contemporary challenges such as water scarcity, pollution, waste management, and climate change. These teachings encourage Muslims to become
responsible custodians of Allah’s creation in both private and public life.
Water conservation: A sacred responsibility
Water occupies a unique position in Islam as the source of life and an essential element of worship. Allah says, “And We made from water every living thing. Then will they not believe?” (Qur’an 21:30, Sahih International). This verse reminds believers that water is not merely an economic resource but a divine blessing upon which all living creatures depend. The importance of water is further reflected in Islamic acts of worship. Muslims perform ablution (wudu) before the five daily prayers and ritual bathing (ghusl) under prescribed circumstances.
Yet, despite its central role in purification, Islam strongly discourages wastefulness. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) once advised one of his companions not to waste water while performing ablution, even when using water from a flowing river (Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 425). This timeless guidance establishes the principle that abundance does not justify extravagance.
Conservation remains a religious obligation regardless of the apparent availability of natural resources.
This Prophetic teaching carries profound implications for contemporary Ghana. Illegal mining has severely polluted many rivers, increasing the cost of water treatment and limiting access to safe drinking water for numerous communities. Climate change has also intensified seasonal variability in rainfall, placing additional pressure on freshwater resources (IPCC, 2023). Against this
backdrop, conserving water is no longer simply an environmental preference—it is a moral imperative grounded in Islamic teaching.
Water conservation should therefore become a shared responsibility among households, educational institutions, industries, and places of worship. Simple practices such as repairing leaking pipes, harvesting rainwater, protecting riverbanks, avoiding contamination of water bodies, and promoting efficient irrigation contribute to safeguarding one of Allah’s greatest blessings. Every effort to preserve water is an investment in public health, food security, and the
wellbeing of future generations.
Unfortunately, indiscriminate disposal of refuse remains a significant challenge in many communities. Plastic waste clogs drainage systems, contributes to flooding during the rainy season, pollutes rivers and beaches, and threatens marine ecosystems. Open burning of waste further degrades air quality and poses serious health risks, particularly for children and the elderly (UNEP,2024).
The author is Chief Imam of Katamanso Municipal and Certified Counsellor and Governnace Expert.
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