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Just in time part 1

Esaaba and Baaba were the only children of their parents. Es­aaba was two years older than Baaba. They had a good, comfort­able upbringing, but Mama and Dada just could not hide the fact that Baaba was their favourite.

They were both good in school, but Baaba was brilliant, all the way to university. She had a sharp mind, she was witty, and very pretty. Boys followed her like flies, and she had a way of shrugging them off without offending them.

Baaba was the practical type. She took her time, and got things done. Esaaba came out with a second class upper in Biochemistry, and Baaba got a first class in Pharmacy. For most of the time they got along quite well, but sometimes they had strong disagreements which only worsened when their parents took Baaba’s side.

When that happened, Esaaba would drop the argument or back out of the issue of contention and walk away. That often made things much worse. Two years after grad­uation, Baaba married a doctor she had met in the university. He was certainly a great guy, both in looks and character.

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They had two kids in two years, and settled down to a peaceful life. Esaaba was still living with their parents and at the age of twen­ty-eight, was not showing any sign of settling down with a guy. Initially their parents only dropped hints every now and then that she should be giving the issue of marriage some consideration.

She would also drop a word or two to indicate that the issue of mar­riage was certainly on her mind, but that she was firmly convinced that it was wrong for a woman to even attempt to look for a man.

The time she was convinced would certainly come, and she was not going to force it. Then Stanley Forson appeared on the scene. He lived with his family at the entrance to the Estates, whilst they were at the other end, some five kilometres away.

He attended an engineering school in Germany and came home to es­tablish a shop that provided hi-tech servicing for Mercedes Benz, Golf and other German cars.

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He was obviously doing well, and often travelled to Germany. He vis­ited a few times, and we went out to some restaurants. Mr and MrsEs­sel took a great liking to him, espe­cially when he brought them gifts when he returned from Hanover, where he was previously based.

One evening they called Esaaba and asked her what she thought of Stanley as a husband. It was obvi­ous, they said that he was interest­ed in her, and the least she could do was return the affection he was showing her.

Esaaba replied that she was doing enough to reciprocate the time Stanley was spending on her. She had cooked a nice meal and invited him to supper, for example, and he had certainly enjoyed himself. She had also bought him two shirts, one on his birthday and the other when he was leaving on one of his trips to Germany.

And she called him regularly, even when he was in Germany. But while they had developed a good friend­ship, Stanley had not even come close to indicating any interest in a relationship, let alone marriage. She said that the best thing to do at that time was to wait, and give him time to sort out whatever issues he had. But they had other plans, and they put them into motion without informing her.

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She learned later that they invited him home one evening, and virtual­ly told him that having known him and his family for many years, they considered him a decent young man with a great future. They had nat­urally taken note of his friendship with their daughter, and wished to assure him that if he had any issues regarding the future of the relation­ship, he could count on them to find a solution.

They went further to say that marriage was an institution that was built over time, that there was never an ideal time to get married, but two young people can decide to join together and build a lasting relationship.

Two days later, Stanley invited Es­aaba out for a drink. He picked her up, and he drove to a snack joint nearby. After they had taken their first sip, he drew closer and said ‘Esaaba, we have been friends for a while, and I believe we know each other well. I think it is time we took our relationship to another level.

I would like to ask you, will you be my wife?’ He took a ring from his breast pocket and continued, ‘I got this for you. Of course, I am not asking you to start wearing it now. I would like you to take it, and when we eventually do the traditional and official ceremonies, you can start wearing it’.

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I tried to hide my surprise and thought of something to say. ‘Stan­ley’ Esaaba said, ‘I am really sur­prised. Thank you very much. What shall I say? Yes, we have known each other for a while. I am certainly interested in your proposal.

I will only make a humble request that you let me know your plans for the future. If I am going to be your wife, then I would like to know what plans you have for us. I hope you understand what I am saying.’

‘Yes, certainly. I understand you perfectly well. I think it’s in order. I just wanted you to know what my intentions are. In the coming days and weeks I will discuss my plans with you, then we can go forward. So will you accept the ring?’

‘Yes’, she said. Certainly. ‘You have already said that you will dis­cuss your plans with me, so on that basis I accept it’.Esaaba did not say anything to her parents about Stan­ley’s proposal. She spent some days wondering what exactly lay behind it. Although she always hoped to en­ter into a relationship, she had not thought about how it could affect her life.

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She was a Teaching Assistant at the Biochemistry Department, and she was considering two options. She could start a three year Mas­ter’s Degree programme at the Department whilst still a teaching assistant, or she could apply for a scholarship to do further studies, preferably in Europe.

If she was going to marry Stanley, then she had to review all those plans. She had not thought about them because they had not come up in the times she spent with him.

They had spent some time to­gether, but they had not discussed anything that indicated an interest in a future relationship. She had visited his home once, and never been to his workplace, even though she knew where he worked. She had no objection to a relationship with him, but she would wish to know more about him.

So she decided that whilst waiting for him to open up regarding his plans, she would also start making some moves. She decided to wait for a week or two, and visit him at his workplace. He went to the house on two occasions, but they carried on as usual, although she noticed that he spent a few minutes chat­ting with her parents each time.

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By Ekow de heer

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Tears of Ghanaman, home and abroad

• Sikaman residents are more hospital to foreign guests than their own kin
• Sikaman residents are more hospital to foreign guests than their own kin

The typical native of Sikaman is by nature a hospitable creature, a social animal with a big heart, a soul full of the milk of earthly good­ness, and a spirit too loving for its own comfort.

Sikaman Palava
Sikaman Palava

Ghanaman hosts a foreign pal and he spends a fortune to make him very happy and comfortable-good food, clean booze, excellent accommoda­tion and a woman for the night.

Sometimes the pal leaves without saying a “thank you but Ghanaman is not offended. He’d host another idiot even more splendidly. His nature is warm, his spirit benevolent. That is the typical Ghanaian and no wonder that many African-Americans say, “If you haven’t visited Ghana. Then you’ve not come to Africa.

You can even enter the country without a passport and a visa and you’ll be welcomed with a pot of palm wine.

If Ghanaman wants to go abroad, especially to an European country or the United States, it is often after an ordeal.

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He has to doze in a queue at dawn at the embassy for days and if he is lucky to get through to being inter­viewed, he is confronted by someone who claims he or she has the power of discerning truth from lie.

In short Ghanaman must undergo a lie-detector test and has to answer questions that are either nonsensical or have no relevance to the trip at hand. When Joseph Kwame Korkorti wanted a visa to an European country, the attache studied Korkorti’s nose for a while and pronounced judgment.

“The way I see you, you won’t return to Ghana if I allow you to go. Korkorti nearly dislocated her jaw; Kwasiasem akwaakwa. In any case what had Korkorti’s nose got to do with the trip?

If Ghanaman, after several at­tempts, manages to get the visa and lands in the whiteman’s land, he is seen as another monkey uptown, a new arrival of a degenerate ape coming to invade civilized society. He is sneered at, mocked at and avoided like a plague. Some landlords abroad will not hire their rooms to blacks because they feel their presence in itself is bad business.

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When a Sikaman publisher land­ed overseas and was riding in a public bus, an urchin who had the impudence and notoriety of a dead cockroach told his colleagues he was sure the black man had a tail which he was hiding in his pair of trousers. He didn’t end there. He said he was in fact going to pull out the tail for everyone to see.

True to his word he went and put his hand into the backside of the bewildered publisher, intent on grab­bing his imaginary tail and pulling it out. It took a lot of patience on the part of the publisher to avert murder. He practically pinned the white mis­creant on the floor by the neck and only let go when others intervene. Next time too…

The way we treat our foreign guests in comparison with the way they treat us is polar contrasting-two disparate extremes, one totally in­comparable to the other. They hound us for immigration papers, deport us for overstaying and skinheads either target homes to perpetrate mayhem or attack black immigrants to gratify their racial madness

When these same people come here we accept them even more hospi­tably than our own kin. They enter without visas, overstay, impregnate our women and run away.

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About half of foreigners in this country do not have valid resident permits and was not a bother until recently when fire was put under the buttocks of the Immigration Service

In fact, until recently I never knew Sikaman had an Immigration Service. The problem is that although their staff look resplendent in their green outfit, you never really see them any­where. You’d think they are hidden from the public eye.

The first time I saw a group of them walking somewhere, I nearly mistook them for some sixth-form going to the library. Their ladies are pretty though.

So after all, Sikaman has an Immi­gration Service which I hear is now alert 24 hours a day tracking down illegal aliens and making sure they bound the exit via Kotoka Interna­tional. A pat on their shoulder.

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I am glad the Interior Ministry has also realised that the country has been too slack about who goes out or comes into Sikaman.

Now the Ministry has warned foreigners not to take the country’s commitment to its obligations under the various conditions as a sign of weakness or a source for the abuse of her hospitality.

“Ghana will not tolerate any such abuse,” Nii Okaija Adamafio, the Interior Minister said, baring his teeth and twitching his little moustache. He was inaugurating the Ghana Refu­gee and Immigration Service Boards.

He said some foreigners come in as tourists, investors, consultants, skilled workers or refugees. Others come as ‘charlatans, adventurers or plain criminals. “

Yes, there are many criminals among them. Our courts have tried a good number of them for fraud and misconduct.

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It is time we welcome only those who would come and invest or tour and go back peacefully and not those whose criminal intentions are well-hidden but get exposed in due course of time.

This article was first published on Saturday March 14, 1998

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 Decisions have consequences

 In this world, it is always important to recognise that every action or decision taken, has consequences.

It can result in something good or bad, depending on the quality of the decision, that is, the factors that were taken into account in the deci­sion making.

The problem with a bad decision is that, in some instances, there is no opportunity to correct the result even though you have regretted the decision, which resulted in the un­pleasant outcome.

This is what a friend of mine refers to as having regretted an unregreta­ble regret. After church last Sunday, I was watching a programme on TV and a young lady was sharing with the host, how a bad decision she took, had affected her life immensely and adversely.

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She narrated how she met a Cauca­sian and she got married to him. The white man arranged for her to join him after the marriage and process­es were initiated for her to join her husband in UK. It took a while for the requisite documentation to be procured and during this period, she took a decision that has haunted her till date.

According to her narration, she met a man, a Ghanaian, who she started dating, even though she was a mar­ried woman.

After a while her documents were ready and so she left to join her husband abroad without breaking off the unholy relationship with the man from Ghana.

After she got to UK, this man from Ghana, kept pressuring her to leave the white man and return to him in Ghana. The white man at some point became a bit suspicious and asked about who she has been talking on the phone with for long spells, and she lied to him that it was her cousin.

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Then comes the shocker. After the man from Ghana had sweet talked her continuously for a while, she decided to leave her husband and re­turn to Ghana after only three weeks abroad.

She said, she asked the guy to swear to her that he would take care of both her and her mother and the guy swore to take good care of her and her mother as well as rent a 3-bedroom flat for her. She then took the decision to leave her hus­band and return to Ghana.

She told her mum that she was re­turning to Ghana to marry the guy in Ghana. According to her, her mother vigorously disagreed with her deci­sion and wept.

She further added that her mum told her brother and they told her that they were going to tell her hus­band about her intentions.

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According to her, she threatened that if they called her husband to inform him, then she would commit suicide, an idea given to her by the boyfriend in Ghana.

Her mum and brother afraid of what she might do, agreed not to tell her husband. She then told her hus­band that she was returning to Ghana to attend her Grandmother’s funeral.

The husband could not understand why she wanted to go back to Ghana after only three weeks stay so she had to lie that in their tradition, grandchildren are required to be present when the grandmother dies and is to be buried.

She returned to Ghana; the flat turns into a chamber and hall accom­modation, the promise to take care of her mother does not materialise and generally she ends up furnishing the accommodation herself. All the promises given her by her boyfriend, turned out to be just mere words.

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A phone the husband gave her, she left behind in UK out of guilty conscience knowing she was never coming back to UK.

Through that phone and social media, the husband found out about his boyfriend and that was the end of her marriage.

Meanwhile, things have gone awry here in Ghana and she had regretted and at a point in her narration, was trying desperately to hold back tears. Decisions indeed have consequences.

NB: ‘CHANGE KOTOKA INTERNA­TIONAL AIRPORT TO KOFI BAAKO INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT’

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