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Where is that vital respect for the elderly gone?
The Holy Bible says in Ephesians 6: 1-3 that, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. Honour your father and mother that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land”. Then 1 Peter 2:7, it says, “Honour all men, love the brotherhood, fear God, honour the King”.
This shows that the Holy Scriptures acknowledge that respect for one another, especially the elderly is so crucial and important in all schemes of affairs on this earth.
RESPECT AND WHAT IT MEANS
Respect in clear terms means that you accept somebody or persons for who they are even when they are different from you or you don’t agree with them. Receiving respect from others is important because it helps us to feel safe and to express ourselves well. Respect in relationship, therefore, builds feelings of trust, safety and well-being.
Though the definition of respect may vary, it usually centres on character, experience and ethics. Respect often starts from an early age and continues to develop over time. Growing up, our parents usually taught us to show respect to people and things from different backgrounds. We were taught to respect authority, such as teachers, the security apparatus and more importantly our elders and senior citizens. Many of us were also taught to show respect to our dear country or the national flag which is the identity of the nation. Sometimes we respect a position not necessarily the person who occupies that position which is not healthy and the best option.
WHY IS RESPECT IMPORTANT?
Someone may ask why is respect important? The answer is very simple and straightforward. It is an essential qualification for a successful career and is sought after your progress through various stages of leadership and responsibility. Simply put, it is something that you want to earn and something you want to bestow. Wherever you are on your career path, it is never too late to focus on recognising those who deserve respect and for you to broaden your efforts to earn the respect of business associates.
It is important to note that these days, respect for one another, especially respecting the elderly by the youth has become a major problem in this beautiful country of ours called Ghana. The youth of today, see nothing wrong in disobeying and showing respect to the elderly in the society. They continue to ignore pieces of advice from the older generation and often pour venom on them at the least opportunity without any justifiable reason. Many young people are hesitant to show respect to adults if they have been disrespected by other adults.
TODAY’S YOUTH BEING DISRESPECTFUL
One may ask why today’s youth are so disrespectful? The answer is simply because of lack of manners. Whereas previous generations misbehaved as a rebellion against authorities, some of today’s youth are so caught up in their own self belief that no authorities exist in their minds.
Experts feel that the times have changed and the entire society has undergone a vast transformation. The youth of today are certainly not thoughtless or insensitive, but it is just that competition has increased so much that possibly these youngsters have little time and patience. They prefer faster pace of maintaining relation which is via internet or Facebook. Besides, much also depends on the upbringing and values inculcated in them by their parents. Lots depend on the upbringing by parents as they failed to impact good manners which is an asset in personal and professional lives. A well- mannered person commands more respect in society.
PARENTS SHIRKING THEIR RESPONSIBILITIES
It is a fact that most parents of today are a contributory factor to the indiscipline and disrespect to the elderly by their children. They are, indeed, doing a great disservice and leading them astray because these parents for reasons best known to themselves, don’t show interest in their upbringing. Their children dress anyhow, thus exposing their bodies and when the elders try to correct them, then the insults emanate.
The electronic devices such as the internet, mobile phones, with their resultant Facebook (now Meta), Instagram, WhatsApp, among others, have also aggravated the situation with all kinds of dirty and pornographic materials and negative foreign cultures, from which our youth try to copy blindly and you dare not talk of this bad and negative behaviours. The internet and the social media have become the platform for the youth to insult people in high authority by posting all kinds of dirty, obnoxious and unprintable materials castigating people with unfounded allegations.
YOUTH NOT INTERESTED IN ELDERLY ADVICE
The youth of today feel they are on top of issues and, therefore, need no guidance nor advice from anyone on how to manage their affairs. They don’t want to take any advice from the elderly as they consider them people who have outlived their usefulness and are bereft of ideas. They fail to realise that the older generation is a repository of wisdom that they can take advantage of and tap for their own good.
Parents have a major responsibility and task of ensuring that their children are well trained and cultured to respect older people. On regular basis they have to talk to their children to respect the elderly and also to tell them that their behaviour matters a lot to them since they don’t want any disappointment from them whatsoever. They have to explain to their children that they need to be polite to people they know as well as strangers. It is important for parents to make sure that their children know that there are no exceptions to being polite and courteous to elders.
ESSENCE OF RESPECTING THE ELDERLY
Showing respect to others is reciprocal. It simply means that you can get the same amount of respect as you give out. Showing appreciation of kindness is impossible without reverence. The fact is you cannot appreciate someone or something you do not hold in high esteem. You cannot really appreciate God if you do not respect Him. Being respectful shows you are grateful. When respect is lost, trust is lost. The bridge to gaining the trust of others is built by respect. Trust is, therefore, a valuable commodity.
The fact is that people you respect, will not only respect you back, but they will love you also. In reality your respect for others will be the foundation of their love for you. Respect is one of the things that make you teach better people because people will like to hear from you. When you show respect to others, people will look up to you to teach them about things. Finally, not only will your social life improve when you respect others. Your life in general, will become better as a result of respecting others.
Showing respect to others irrespective of their background is so crucial and vital and we need to cultivate this habit to forge ahead. Parents must also show much interest in their children and ensure that they get the needed training that will promote mutual respect for one another, more importantly for the elderly in the society.
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By Charles Neequaye
ALL these forms of responsibility are sustained by one central pillar: spiritual and moral discipline. Without it, knowledge becomes pride, power becomes oppression, and freedom becomes chaos.
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said: “The strong man is not the one who overcomes others by his strength, but the one who controls himself while in anger.” (Bukhari, Hadith 6114)
This control taqwā is the root of responsibility. Imam Al-Ghazali (1105) in Ihya Ulum al-Din wrote that the purification of the soul (tazkiyah al-nafs) is the foundation of all reform. A responsible man disciplines his desires, guards his words, and acts with sincerity, even when no one is watching.
We live in an era of temptation — social media, materialism, and moral relativism challenge our values. But men of faith must rise above these influences and remember that Allah is Al-Raqīb — the Ever-Watchful. Spiritual accountability anchors moral behaviour.
8. Emotional and psychological responsibility
Responsibility also includes taking care of one’s mental and emotional well-being. Many men suffer silently under the burden of expectation — believing that showing emotion is weakness.
Yet, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم shed tears, expressed compassion, and sought counsel.
Psychologist Aaron Beck (1976) in Cognitive Therapy and the Emotional Disorders emphasised that emotional maturity begins with self-awareness, recognising one’s feelings, and managing them constructively.
Group counselling sessions like this are essential; they help men share, heal, and grow together. No man should walk alone; strength is not isolation, but the courage to seek support. Let us normalise counselling, mentorship, and brotherhood among men. For in unity, we find healing; in shared wisdom, we find growth.
9. The five questions of accountability
The Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم said: “The feet of the son of Adam shall not move on the Day of Resurrection before he is asked about five things:
- His life — how he lived it;
- His youth — how he used it;
- His wealth — how he earned it and how he spent it;
- His knowledge — how he acted upon it.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 2416; also reported in al-Darimi)
This hadith captures the essence of personal accountability — the cornerstone of responsibility in Islam. It reminds every believer that every blessing carries a duty, and every stage of life demands conscious action.
Let’s break it down:
- “His life — how he lived it”
Life is a divine trust (amānah). A responsible man lives with purpose, not pleasure as his goal. He invests his time in doing good, serving others, and seeking Allah’s pleasure. - “His youth — how he used it”
Youth is the most energetic and creative phase — and thus the most accountable. As Ibn al-Qayyim noted in Madarij al-Salikin, “The strength of youth is a blessing, and blessings invite responsibility.” Men must use their youth to build character, gain knowledge, and resist destructive habits. - “His wealth — how he earned it and how he spent it”
Financial integrity is a key part of manhood. Islam demands transparency, fairness, and generosity. The Qur’an warns against wastefulness: “Indeed, the wasteful are brothers of the devils.” (Qur’an 17:27) A responsible man earns lawfully, gives in charity, and spends wisely. - “His knowledge — how he acted upon it”
Knowledge is meaningless if not practiced. Imam Al-Ghazali wrote that knowledge without action is a burden, not a blessing. A responsible man translates his learning into character, leadership, and service.
This Hadith teaches that responsibility in Islam is total and it covers time, energy, wealth, and knowledge. It’s not only about what we achieve, but how we live, how we give, and how we grow.
10. Summary
Responsibility, therefore, is not a single act but a lifestyle — one that touches every sphere of life:
- Educational responsibility empowers us to think and serve.
- Marital and family responsibility keeps our homes strong.
- Environmental responsibility safeguards our future.
- Civic responsibility builds our nation.
- Moral and spiritual responsibility sustains our integrity.
- Emotional responsibility maintains our well-being.
A responsible man is thus an educated mind, a loving heart, a disciplined spirit, and a servant leader. He is not perfect, but he is purposeful.
11. Conclusion
My brothers, as we look toward the future, let us remember the divine reminder:
“The believers, men and women, are protectors of one another. They enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong.” (Qur’an 9:71)
Our communities are counting on us — our sisters, mothers, and children look to us for leadership and example. Let us not disappoint them. When we build responsible men today, we build a Ghana that is peaceful, prosperous, and principled.
Let us be men of knowledge and humility, strength and compassion, faith and fairness. And may Allah grant us the wisdom to lead ourselves before we lead others. Āmīn.
Imam Alhaji Saeed Abdulai, Kpone Katmanso Municipal Chief Imam, governance expert and certified counselor.
By Imam Alhaji Saeed Abdulai
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Today, I focus on Ghanaian/African migrants in Finland and their mental health. Mental health is an important subject and a huge problem in the world.
According to the World Health Organisation (WHO), brain health is the state of brain functioning across cognitive, sensory, social-emotional, behavioural and motor domains, allowing a person to realise their full potential over the life course, irrespective of the presence or absence of disorders.
Studies have shown that maternal and paternal distress are associated with reduced linear growth of their children. I recently participated in a seminar on mental health among (African) migrants in Finland. We all wondered about the prevalence or incidence of mental illness among migrants in Finland. It will be interesting to know the statistics about mental illness among migrants in Finland.
Mental health in Finland
In Finland, studies have examined how behavioural risk factors mediate the effects of childhood disadvantage on adult psychological distress. A correlation is shown between parent and infant psychotherapy on maternal mental health and psychological functioning and children’s welfare.
There are also research and other reports of social child welfare interventions where at times children are even taken away (child removals) from the parent or parents for safe keeping.
Experts say it is important how parents plan their leaves in order to renew or rebuild their mental strength to be able to take good care of their kids.
Anyway, studies are limited about parent-child psychological distress and situations where children are taken away from their parents among minorities, such as African migrants. It will be interesting to know the figures and other aspects of mental health issues among the migrant group(s) in Finland.
Health and migrant vulnerability
Health experts point out that migrant communities can be highly vulnerable to diseases, especially certain infectious diseases. Experts say those who came to Finland as refugees or asylum seekers and their family members are often in a more vulnerable position in terms of their health (see www.thl.fi).
Research and media reports have shown in many countries that there are structural or societal/cultural factors that result in quite high rates of infection or ill-health among migrants, when compared to the majority population.
It is suggested that for example language barrier, lack of information, the nature of the work of migrants in professions where working from home is not possible (for example during the Covid-19 pandemic), not accessing healthcare, etc. can present some of the factors for migrants’ vulnerability to diseases and infections.
Childhood disadvantage
Information about the issue. Such a situation was much evidenced to reduce stress and anxiety during the coronavirus situation.
Thus, these associations and institutions become networks that create an important social capital as well as outlets for sharing and gaining information or knowledge.
Finland is committed to the integration of migrants into the Finnish society, as I keep pointing out. A number of research studies from surveys and other in-depth enquiries have shown a trend of increasing efforts to integrate African and other migrants into the Finnish society.
As the Finnish Institute for Health and Welfare (THL) has pointed out, health and wellbeing are an important part of integration of immigrants in Finland (see www.thl.fi).
There have been studies on whether behavioural risk factors mediate the effects of childhood disadvantage on adult psychological distress and child welfare intervention by social services. Unhealthy behaviours and their associations with subsequent sickness among Finnish young and early midlife employees have been studied.
When it comes to this subject and/or the effect of adult psychological distress on children’s wellbeing among African migrants in Finland, there is limited knowledge.
We should hope for more information to augment understandings about adult psychological distress and effect on children’s wellbeing among African migrants in order to inform policy directions.
Such studies will help to create awareness among migrants in Finland about their mental health, its effect on them and their children’s wellbeing, as well as where to seek therapy.
Migrant associations, social networks, and information
Migrants associations are already doing much to help in education on mental health and have become important points for securing. Public agencies, migrant associations and other non-governmental organisations (NGOs) in Finland have been publishing information to help educate people about their health and wellbeing.
Generally, migrant associations formally create awareness among their members and other migrants usually in collaboration with some Finnish institutions, and are thus an important tool for several migrants to be positively active and to get their interests and claims heard.
As I wrote previously, the role of migrant associations acting as bridge-builders for the integration and inclusion of migrants through participation in the decision making process and by acting as a representative voice is highly appreciated in Finland. Thank you!
By Perpetual Crentsil
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