Obaa Yaa
What is the meaning of love?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I AM really disturbed about the new meaning of the word ‘Love’ in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship (not in marriage). I feel love should not be based on sexual intercourse.
What do our men mean when they say to a woman ‘I love you’ and what is our women’s understanding of the response ‘I love you too’?
Personally, I have come to understand that most of the time when a man says he loves a woman, all he means and needs is sexual intercourse, and when a woman responds ‘I love you too,’ she also means marriage.
This small research can be confirmed by Walter Trobisch in his book entitled I Married You.
At this juncture, I would like you to use your column to find out from some of our men and women what they really mean when they say to each other ‘I love you.’
Yaa Baby, Takoradi.
Greetings
Dear Yaa Baby,
I MUST say you are quite right to say that the expression of ‘love’ is beginning to take a different meaning.
People seem to have a motive when they say ‘I love you’ to the opposite sex. It may be that they pretend to love just for sex, marriage, or money.
What this does is that the pledge ‘I love you’ leads more gullible partners to disappointment and hurt, while the deceitful partner may also, in the end, fall into their own trap.
So, with the widespread abuse of the phrase ‘I love you,’ men and women should not hasten to believe anyone who says it to them. Even after starting a relationship with their partners, they must continue to observe their actions to ensure the pledge is genuine, not just words.
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 35year –old-lady married to a banker. I am a housewife. I am fair in complexion. I got my left hand tattooed sometime last year. I have never had my peace with my husband because he strongly abhors.
In my attempt to get it erased, I have caused a big scar on my hand which has worsened the situation. Sometime ago, your esteemed paper carried a story about how permanent tattoo can be cleared and a location.
May I know whether it is possible to get the scar and tattoo erased, and how much it would cost.
Worried housewife, Prampram.
Dear housewife,
Since I have no idea how wide and deep the scar and tattoo are, it would be difficult for me to have a meaningful discussion with the specialists at the unit.
I suggest that the next time you visit Accra, you pay a visit to any skincare unit and ask what help they can offer.
But until then, do not apply any self-medication. You may also ask your doctor to advise you as if there is any way out for a surgery. All the best.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Ever since we got married, two years ago, my husband seldom wears his wedding ring except on occasion such as church service, funerals, outdooring and other social gatherings.
For the rest of the week, he goes to work without it. The excuse he gives is that whether he wears the ring to work or not, he is by law married to me.
But I beg to differ. I suspect there is more to it than what he told me. I need your advice on this.
Eno, Ashiaman.
Dear Eno,
Some men don’t like wearing rings; others enjoy it. It is just like how some women like wearing jewellery or large earing while others would rather do away with them.
The fact, however, is that a man can misbehave even when he wears it or not because there are ladies who wouldn’t mind with the ring on.
When he gets back home, he would wear it again. What difference does it make if he doesn’t wear it all?
