Obaa Yaa
My wife wants what I can’t afford
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My wife told me to buy her a brand new car as a birthday present. I have been saving towards this.
My intention was to get her a Nissan second hand car. Three days to her birthday, she told me she wanted a Range Rover because that is what her friends have been using.
I cannot afford this and even if I can do it, I may have to save additional money. She would not understand this.
She now calls me ‘irresponsible’ and all sort of names. I am so embarrassed by this behaviour.
Kwesi, Racecourse
Dear Kwesi,
Your wife isn’t treating you fairly if this is the story. If on the other hand she has a reason to believe you misuse your money, then she may have a point.
For me, your wife shouldn’t use what her friends are doing as a marker for you. After all you were willing to buy her a car of your choice but she rejected.
We are not in normal times so advise your wife to appreciate everything you do for her.
Advise her to stay away from those friends I believe may be influencing her.
Anyway, why don’t you sit down and talk amicably about this? If it’s Range Rover she wants, tell her she will get it but not now.
I think it makes sense for her to wait, unless she doesn’t want her preferred car.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We bumped into each other on orientation day as freshers on campus. I liked his smile, his choice of words, and charisma. I didn’t hesitate at all when he asked for my contact. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with a guy like this, I said to myself.
We texted more often, had conversations on phone, and our friendship literally grew very strong. We attended lectures together, studied together, hanged out together; everyone thought we were lovers.
He did everything for me—surprise dates, thoughtful gifts, pays my academic fees, and gives me a listening ear everyone would wish for.
One evening at a friend’s birthday party, standing in the middle of the audience, he proposed and asked me to be his girlfriend. I declined his proposal; this was because I have no feelings for him, and I just want us to be friends.
He is a man with good morals, so gentle, God-fearing, ambitious, a man every lady would wish for, but my heart just wasn’t in it. I wondered if love was supposed to be this complicated: the more he did, the more I felt like a friend, not a lover. He still wants me, but I want us to be just friends. What should I do?
Naa Kwarley, Kaneshie.
Dear Naa Kwarley,
This is a tough situation, and you’re handling it with both kindness and firmness.
Since you’ve already told him you’re not interested in a romantic relationship, it’s crucial to be clear and direct while still being respectful. I’d advise you to reiterate your feelings to him, emphasising that you value him as a person and appreciate what he’s done, but you see him more as a close friend. Make it clear that you hope you can still maintain a strong friendship, but it can’t be anything more.
It’s essential to be prepared for him to need space or time to process, so be patient and understanding.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a regular reader of your highly esteemed paper and I would like to know whether some amount of money is paid to those who write short stories for publication on the children’s page of your Weekly Spectator.
I wrote a short story which was published last month, and my friends who saw it told me that a token will be paid to anyone whose story is published.
A.J., Kwabenya.
Dear A.J.,
We don’t pay for short stories published on our children’s page. That opportunity is to encourage school children to develop the habit of writing. We believe that by publishing their short stories, they’ll be encouraged to write more.
The paper is open to everyone who wants to share ideas or write about a concern.
